I am sorry Finn
Well this f*****g sucks. I don’t like to swear, so I don’t do it very often. But since I don’t have any other words to describe my situation, yeah, this f*****g sucks.
I’ve always thought I’ve had rather good life. Sure, some things happened. My mom and dad died some time ago and I am pretty much all that's left of the Berry family, but over the years, I was practically adopted by a rather peculiar group of people who became like my second family.
Sure, they tend to be rather loud, sometimes surprisingly hairy and unnecessarily violent, but everybody has something right?
I was about seven years old when my mom and dad got into a car accident that took them from me forever. I survived because I was saved by these hairy people who were just running by.
After that, my childhood was pretty normal. I mean, after I survived my initial shock after learning that werewolves exist, it was pretty normal. Well, maybe not extremely normal, since I very soon realized that I suffered from very deep and very unrequited love for my best friend, who was one of the testosterone-driven, straighter than a ruler macho wolves.
But who could blame me? He was everything I was not. He was perfect, strong yet kind and beautiful. The whole package. And he was my best friend. Antony was very popular with the boys and a magnet for the ladies.
I was just me, so naturally, I never told him about my feelings. And I was somewhat okay with just silently admiring him from a distance or when he was not looking. Just his presence brought me joy and his smile could carry me through a whole week.
I knew that since he was a wolf, he was destined to one day meet his second half and live happily ever after or until some other testosterone-driven wolf challenged him and killed him in a brutal bloodbath. (Basically the same thing to me) But I tried not to think about it too much and enjoy the time I had left.
Then his twentieth birthday passed and nothing happened. He seemed like he wasn’t even surprised that he hadn’t met his destined one yet.
After a while, all the excitement in the pack faded and life went back to normal. He finished his training and began to take over from his father and I finished university and opened my own small veterinary clinic. And after work, we spent all our free time together, just us having fun. Only my love for him seemed to grow even stronger. Every day started to feel difficult to me. I wanted, no, I needed to touch him, to hold him, do all sorts of very unholy things to him and let him do even more unholy things to me. It was a torture.
But I would take it any day over what happened next, because one day I woke up in the small house just at the edge of the pack land I was given when I came of age and found Anthony sitting on my bed. He was looking at me kindly as always, but something in his thoughtful stare gave me goosebumps and not the good ones.
“I am sorry Finn, I didn’t want to do this, not now anyway, but I think we are both strong enough now and, according to my father, it is the highest time to do it so I can finally fully take over.” he said calmly.
I didn’t know what was happening, but the feeling of dread was slowly taking over and my fight or flight instincts were kicking in.
“Tony, what are you talking about? What is going on?” I asked, trying not to let my voice shake.
“See, this is what I am talking about, you don’t even know, so it should be fine.”
At this point, I was lost in his riddles, so I just settled on staring at him helplessly.
My apparent confusion seemed to help him with his final decision. He sighed deeply before uttering those devastating words. “I am going to reject you, Finn.”
