Joined Paths

Chapter-4

Allena

"Because I don't trust myself with you," I shouted out. I felt so overwhelmed with my emotion that I could feel my heart thumping and all I wanted was to speak everything that's bottled up in me but I knew he can't handle that right now.

How could he go around announcing I am his girlfriend like that? I could feel my veins pumping from anger.

But more than anger I felt helpless,  my emotions were all fussed.  I don't know what is right to do any longer.

He tried to get up and come near me but I raised my hand to stop him, "Stop, please stop. Don't do this, I know you will say something and I wouldn't be able to stop myself and I will again fall for you"

"Then please fall for me again, I will do anything to make you love me back" he pleaded and I could see the sincerity in his eyes.

I looked up into his eyes "No.., I won't because I know this time when you leave me and I know you will, I will completely break. I won't be able to survive it." I said in between my sobs. I no longer had control over my tears. I didn't care what anyone will think. It was all too much to bear. So much pain and hurt.

 I sat on the edge of the bed and he immediately pulled me in his embrace and I cried myself out. His arm around me made me feel so warm and after such a long time I felt safe, protected. I know it was wrong but I didn't want to move, I wanted to stay there forever, I wanted this moment to never end.

"I never meant to hurt you and I am so sorry I did. I know I f****d up but I want to make amends, I will never leave you, I will make you the happiest woman on this planet. You are my sunshine my life my everything, please don't leave me. I can't live without you." he said but I couldn't reply, no words came out of my mouth. 

He sighed and continued, "I know  what Esther did was wrong but don't make it a reason to hate me."

I got away from him immediately and now I was staring blankly at him, "You don't get it, do you?" 

"What do I not get?"

"That it doesn't hurt when Esther thinks I am a golddigger or when the world thinks that I leaked that video just to get money but it hurts like hell when you believe that all the time I spent with you and all my feelings for you were because of your money. It kills me that you used my deepest regret about my mother against me just because you believed that stupid video leak. You believed everything that you ever saw against me but you never ever believed in my love. You didn't have the courage to open the letter for ten years. You never believed in me. Because...because You don't trust me." I said breathlessly.

I know this isn't the place or time for all this but I couldn't keep it all in any longer. I was tired of people coming and going out of my life when they feel like so. First dad and now him, I am not a toy without feelings. And then they want me to take them back like I am just supposed to accept it without any question and just forget all the hurt I felt.

Now he was speechlessly staring at me. His eyes showed he regretted it but I guess I no longer wanted to believe in them.

So I just turned around and started walking towards the gate.

"So, you don't care about me anymore?" he said, now he was walking toward me. 

He came and stood beside me so close that I could feel his breath on my neck, "No" I managed to barely say. I myself didn't believe what I said. I know I never did, never can, and never will stop caring about him. No matter what he does, there is some part of me that will always love him.

He stopped just in front of me"Then why did you come here every night?" he whispered near my ears and I felt a tingle down my spine. All the reasoning was slipping from my brain as he closed the little gap between us and with each of his kisses on my neck I felt my knees going weak. My hands automatically went into his hair as his lips came near my cheeks.

His lips were inches away from mine and his hands held me against the door, I felt heat rose in my body.

"Because you are my friend"I blabbered. What, f**k, why would I say that? There couldn't be anything more stupid to say. It would have been better if I just shut up. Uhh, I hate nervous me.

He looked at me stunned and then laughed. I felt embarrassed but his genuine laugh gave me butterflies in my stomach. He looks even hotter when he laughs. I pushed him away to hide my blush and thankfully he let me slide.

"You remember the last time you said we should be friends, it didn't last for a day," he said limping towards me.

I mindlessly ran toward him to support him and make him sit on the bed" Will you stop walking all around, you haven't recovered fully"

"Only if you promise me not to go," he said with his puppy face. I hated that I can't say no to that. He always used it to get his way.

"Uhhh... Ok, but we will just be friends and nothing more." I know that is next to impossible but i had no other option right now. I can't leave him like this in the hospital when I am the reason he is in hospital but I also don't want to start any romantic relationship again right now

"We will see to it." he deviously smiled. 

"I have to go now, I am already late for my job. I will come back as soon as I can"

"What? Why? Which job? It's already evening. Can't you just stay?"

"No, but I will come back first thing in the morning. And I am sending Robert in with the food, please eat it."

"I will but at least tell me where you work? Is it a safe place?" he asked worriedly, I don't know why but his caring about me made me feel weirdly happy.

"No, don't worry, I will be fine," I said exiting the door with a smile on my face which I could no longer hide. 

After talking to Robert I took a taxi to the club as I was already late.

At the very entrance, my manager Abby was standing there as if waiting for me only. My all hopes of getting in without getting noticed went down the drain.

"I am so Sorry Abby I am late but it was an emergency.."

"No Allena, I am sorry but you are fired," he said with seriousness.

"But Abby, I was just late today. I ensure you it will not be repeated. Please let me have my job"

"No, it's not just that. We are cutting on people and we have to let you go."

Before I could continue a waiter came from behind, "Sir, there is a call from Mr. Paul for you" I could see the blood drain out of Abby's face.

 I instantly started to walk out of there. I should have guessed it. 

"Allena, I am sorry" he shouted from behind.

There was no point to wait there for a second more so I went straight to the taxi stand to go back to the hospital. I am not leaving that bastard this time.

He thinks he owns everybody around here. He will regret doing this.

By the time I reached the hospital, I was fuming with anger.