Dear Moon Goddess

I sit and stare in the mirror, brushing my long dark brown curls. I can hear my mother in the kitchen cooking breakfast, the smell of bacon wafting up the stairs and through my bedroom door. Today would be my last day with my pack, and my family for a while, as I would be soon traveling to the American Packs, maybe even further, in search of my mate. Being alone in my room helped me think about what has brought me to this day. It was rare not to find your mate soon after your sixteenth birthday, but here I was, turning 18 tomorrow and I still hadn't found mine, and not for lack of trying. I continue brushing my hair wondering what my mate would be like. Would he be tall? Short? Brave? Caring? Or would he be mean? Ruthless? Hateful? The moon goddess paired mates with their perfect other half, but I've seen mated couples split apart because they aren't compatible, and that's not an easy decision to make, because leaving your mate feels like ripping your soul in half. If you think about it, it actually is ripping your soul in half. Figuring I had stalled long enough in my room, I grab my suitcases and head downstairs. I smile to myself as I hear my mother scolding my brother. "Jonathan! Stop eating all the bacon before I can even set the table!" my mom laughed as she lightly smacked his hand. As werewolves, we tend to eat a lot more than a typical human. Shifting into our wolf form burns a lot of calories and takes a lot of energy. " But mom, I'm hungry now, " my brother complains. I giggle, I was going to miss my family while I was gone. I sit down next to my brother, ruffling up with light blond hair. He and I are twins, but look nothing alike. He got our mothers blond hair and blue eyes, but stands tall like our father at 6'4'' with the defined muscles every wolf tends to have. I on the other hand look more like our father, dark brown hair and hazel eyes, but stand shorter like my mother at only 5'3'' with more curves to go with my muscle. We were the children of the Alpha and Luna of the Midnight Pack, Nestled into the mountains in Tennessee. My brother was training to be the next Alpha, with his mate, Tori, being mentored by our mother to become the next Luna. Being a female, I couldn't take over the pack, which I'm not disappointed about, but being the daughter of an Alpha, I had a very strict and structured upbringing. I didn't get out much unless it was pack duties, or school. Today would be the first time I would be leaving our small town, and venturing off on my own. I was terrified to say the least. Bringing my focus back to the present, I grabbed some plates and set the table for breakfast. This would be the last meal I would have with my family. Being a female, I would be joining the pack of my mate once I found him. It's unfortunately how it works in our world. "So, what time do I leave?" I asked with a sigh, knowing someone else arranged all the travel plans, and knowing I have an itinerary shoved into my carry on luggage for the flight. "You have about an hour before you have to be at the airport," my dad said coming into the kitchen and placing a kiss on my head. I sighed, feeling defeated, wishing my mate was my best friend Levi. He was the future beta for the Midnight Pack, but he also hasn't found his mate either, which means I will at least have a friendly face on this trip for as long as it takes the first to find their mate. "I'm all packed and have everything by the door," I say, taking a bite of my eggs. I know they were sad I was going to be leaving, but they would never say as much. Everyone had a sense of duty to our pack, and finding a mate was part of that duty. "Darling, you know it's tradition to do these trips for all unmated wolves at 18. You will have fun and it will he worth it when you find your mate," my mother placed her hand on mine, smiling sweetly at me. "Now finish eating so we can get you there on time, we still need to pick up Levi as well." I sighed, this was going to be a long day. We all got loaded up in the car and made it to the airport in plenty of time. Most packs had a private jet, but with the amount of travel that was planned, it didn't make sense to hold up the plane for us, which meant we had to go through all of the security at the airport. Levi kept nudging my arm while we made our way to our gate, already having said goodbye to our families, Noone shedding a tear. "Hmmm?" I asked after the 3rd time he nudged me, still lost in my thoughts about what the next few weeks would bring. "Are you going to he okay Sid?" he asked, nudging me again. "I know you didn't want to do this in the first place" Thinking about his question, I didn't really know how to answer, was I okay? "I'm not really sure, if I find my mate on this trip, I don't get to go home, but then again, I will have my mate." I sighed, "what if he's awful? What if he rejects me? What if he's a ruthless killer?" Throwing all of my concerns out onto the air, knowing Levi wouldn't discredit my fears like my mother would have done. "Even if he's the worst wolf imaginable, he would be stupid to reject you," he smiled, nudging me one last time before we gave the attendent our tickets so we could board our flight. Once we got seated in first class, I pulled out my itinerary to read up on the first stop. We would be flying out to the Grey Moon Pack in California first. They were a smaller pack, but fierce according to their reputation. Looking at the map of their territory I noticed that one border ran along the beach. Their alpha, Jerrod was 19 and unmated, along with 20 other male wolves and 16 unmated she-wolves. "Anything interesting about the first pack?" Levi leaned over looking at the open binder in front of me. So I relayed everything I had read so far. Both of us slightly excited to see the beach for the first time. "Maybe we will be lucky and find our mates at the first stop of the trip," I laughed, knowing it was a slim possibility. Looking at Levi after the laughing quieted down, I yawned loudly as I decided to get comfortable in my seat, we had a few hours before we got there and a nap seemed nice right now. "Wake me when we get there." I laughed as I shut my eyes, not willing to let Levi know how nervous I really was the closer we got to California. Nightmares plagued my sleep, like any other time I closed my eyes. Nightmares of rouges breaking through onto our territory, the same black eyes I remember seeing coming through my bedroom window 3 years ago. The scene always playing on repeat for me. Me trying to scream out for someone but having a rag forcefully tied about my mouth, effectively gagging me, before a single noise could come out. The Rouge running his half shifted claw down the side of my face, tracing the path my tears took. I was unable to move or scream for help, trying not to panic, but knowing that whatever happened next was in the hands of this man in front of me. I woke, startled, when Levi shook me from my nightmare. "You okay?" he asked. Looking at me with so much concern. Taking in deep breaths I realized I was breathing extremely hard and I had broke out in a cold sweat, hands trembling in my lap. Levi knew about the nightmares, he also knew what happened that night when the rouges invaded our homes. He was the only one who knew of everything that happened, because he was the one who found me afterwards. Since then, we had become inseparable. "Just a nightmare, I'm fine," I tried to smile reassuringly, but I'm sure it came out as more of a grimace. But quickly turned my head when I saw pity in his brown eyes as he looked at me, trying to judge if I was lying or not. Running his hand through his dark brown hair he sighed, "I know it's been rough, but it's over, you're safe now." I only nodded, looking at the window while seeing LAX come into view. Once we landed we would have a heck of a drive ahead of us to get to the pack, hopefully they sent someone to pick us up at the airport. I had heard sometimes packs forget that. I smiled up at Levi, hoping it calmed him down a bit, "Looks like we made it."