Prologue
It was a regular Thursday, or so I thought. I had just gotten settled in at my desk, sipping on my second cup of coffee for the morning, when Marissa, my supervisor, came walking toward me with that “I’ve-got-bad-news” look. I’d seen it before, and it never ended well. My stomach dropped just a little at the thought that I could be out the door.
“Nikole, can we talk for a sec?” Her voice was tight, like she was trying to soften what was coming.
I nodded, my heartbeat slightly quickened. I wiped my palms on my jeans before standing up. I was still rocking my “boss b***h” energy, or at least trying to. But I knew what it was.
We walked to the meeting room in the back of the office. I could already hear the faint voices of my colleagues working through the thin walls. I stepped inside and Marissa motioned for me to sit. She took a seat across from me, folding her hands together like she was preparing herself to break my heart.
"Nik," she started, hesitating like she couldn’t figure out how to say what she had to. “You’ve been doing good work, but after a recent evaluation... the company decided to go in a different direction. We’re going to have to let you go.”
My brain froze. For a second, I thought I hadn’t heard her right. I had barely been here six months. Six months, and this was the thanks I got?
"Wait," I tried to keep my voice steady, but it cracked a little. "You're... you're firing me?" The word felt foreign on my tongue, a bitter pill I didn’t want to swallow. "I—I don’t understand. I’ve been on top of everything. I came in early and stayed late. You said you were impressed with my work."
She nodded, her lips tight and her blonde hair neatly pulled back as she tried to remain professional. "You have. But, like I said, it’s just not a fit with the team, and the company’s restructuring."
Not a fit!
I leaned back in the chair, trying to collect myself. It was hard not to let the frustration show. "So, all that talk about how ‘you saw potential in me’ was just... what? A lie?"
She bit her lip, clearly uncomfortable. "Nikole, I don’t want you to take this personally—"
"I’m not taking it personally, I’m taking it how it was given to me." My voice became sharper, a little more pointed. "You knew exactly what you were doing when you hired me. Why even bother to waste my time if you were just going to turn around and pull this mess?"
There was no sound, only my heartbeat and her nervous breathing. Marissa shifted in her seat, clearly trying to find some kind of comforting words. But I was done listening. I’d spent years working my ass off, always feeling like I had to prove I was just as good, just as smart, just as beautiful and worthy as everyone else around me. And now, this?
My hands clenched into fists. I wasn’t going to cry.
Hell no!
I’d been through enough to know the last thing I needed was a breakdown. Especially not in front of her. I didn’t need to be viewed as another stigma of the weak or angry black woman.
I stood up, pushing the chair back maybe with a little more force than necessary. I took a breath before I spoke. "You know what? You don’t have to give me a reason. I’m gone."
I turned to walk out with my head high, and Marissa’s voice followed me. "Nik, please—"
I didn’t look back as I walked to my now previous desk and I grabbed my purse, my coat, and walked out of that office like I was walking out of my whole damn future. I’m better than this. I’ll find another insurance job. If they thought they were going to keep me down with some corporate bullshit, they clearly had me messed up. I stepped outside and walked towards my car. I got inside and let out a breath. Now what?
