Stay

Beg Each Other for More…

When I've hit the ground

You're all I need

'Cause your love lifts me up like helium…

- Sia

He pulls away and watches my face. Then he grins at me.

“I love the effect I have on you. Suits you perfectly.” He says and kisses my cheek. I inhale.

“Alex, do you think they liked me?” I look at him batting my eyelashes. He c***s his head and laughs.

“They did. Don’t worry.” Then he hugs me gently and we just stand there for long moments. Suddenly, Lana opens the door. She clears her throat.  

“Guys, the dessert is waiting. But I think you prefer each other’s company more.” She grins. I blush. Alex scowls.

Soon, he lets me go and takes my hand instead. With his other hand, he hugs Lana’s shoulders and kisses her temple. “Let’s go ladies.” He says and leads us downstairs.

Alex’s home feels like home. His family is loving and welcoming. I remind myself of how long I haven’t seen my mom and dad. My throat closes with sadness. Alex notices it and takes my hand. I look at him.

“Sweetheart, are you okay?” Alex’s mom asks. She is concerned.

“No, no, I’m sorry. It’s just… You reminded me of my parents and I miss them.” I confess and lower my head. I can hear gasping sounds and when I look up, they are all smiling at me.

Alexander kisses my hand and his gaze is so loving, so soft. The rest of the evening is a mixture of laughter, jokes and happiness. Soon, Alex and I, using our perfect gesture language, silently tell each other it’s time to go home… His parents are awesome but we still need to go.

As we leave their place, I really want to ask Alex if we can just go for a walk rather than going home so soon. The evening is warm; there’s only a soft breeze caressing my skin.

“Do you mind if we don’t go home right away?” Alex asks me breaking my train of thought. I grin.

“I was just going to ask you that. Can you read my mind?” I say and he smiles.

“Let’s go to the Singing Fountains.” His ideas are perfect every time.

Singing Fountains are like an artwork, alive and breathing. The water is colored by many lights and it ‘dances’ to classical music. One of my most favorite places. We take a seat next to them and just watch. Soon, Aram Khachaturian’s compositions fill the air and we don’t need to speak to understand each other. We just feel each other.

“I want to take you to your parents.” Alex says suddenly. I am surprised.

“You do? How?”

“I want them to know me and I want you to see them. You looked so sad today.” He says as I lean into his chest. I love him so much. The way he cares, the way he wants me to be happy…

“When?” I ask him. I’m overwhelmed by his offer. I immediately regret every single bad thought I have ever had about him.

“Well, I will need to arrange things in the company. But I will do everything according to your wish, so…”

“Hmm, I’m thinking… My parents live five hours away from here so if we want to really spend time with them, it’s much better to stay a day. What if we go on Friday and come back on Sunday?”

“Sounds good. So we have a week to prepare. It’s Saturday today.”

“Yep.” I grin. I am so excited. My dad’s going to rave about his army skills and see if he can scare Alex away. I laugh just imagining this.

“What?” Alex says examining my face.

“I just imagined you with my dad. You know he has been in the army right?” He laughs. Then his face suddenly falls. I know him well enough to know that something is disturbing him inside.

“What is it?” I ask him cupping his cheek. The soft stubble caresses my palm.

“I am going to worry about you and Lily. It’s always on my mind. I don’t want you to go home.”

“We are going to be okay, really.”

“No. You will talk to Lily as soon as you go home. My broker is going to contact your dad tomorrow. I don’t want him to know it’s me buying the place.”

“I know.” Suddenly I am ashamed once again that he has to go through all of this because of me. But even I myself am scared for me and Lily…

“Look at me.” I do. “I will never let anything or anyone hurt you. Understand?” I nod. “Good. Now come here.” And he hugs me to him. In front of the fountains. My dream come true.

“Should we go home? It’s midnight.” I ask him. He nods. And just like that, we wander in the cosy streets of Yerevan, illuminated by orange lights and stars. His home has become home to me as well. I spend half of the week there and Lily has grown used to it, of which I am not proud. Seems like I have left her all by herself.

“Alex.” I say when he pours me my cup of iced tea at his kitchen counter.

“Yes, sunshine?” he winks at me. Why, why does he have to be this cute when I need him not to be cute? I want to jump him right away. Like, there’s a difference between yummy cute and masculine cute which is not really about cuteness overall, but about him being cute. Hard to explain, I know.

“I am feeling so bad for leaving Lily alone all the time. She must be very lonely and I am acting very selfish.” I pause and look at him. His eyes betray that he knows what I’m going to say. “I want to go home today.”

“Well…” He takes the bar stool next to mine and grabs my knees, spinning me to face him. Then he locks my knees with his. When will I get used to this man? This beautiful, powerful to intimidation man. “I will take you home if you promise you will talk to Lily about moving out. And if you kiss me now.” He flashes his breathtaking smile and I melt… I kiss him oh so gently and sweetly. I love him so much, so much. Please, please I want to be with him for all my life.

His hands come to embrace me and naturally I fit his frame. Our bodies mold in a way unexplainable. I feel so his… I have wondered for a long time about what home is. And now, just now I realize that I have never been more home than I am now, in his arms… He is my home.

“I promise.” I say quietly, trying not to cry because my natural reaction to a beautiful moment is to cry. It has always been so.

“Don’t cry, sunshine.” He says softly and it makes me want to cry more. In the short time we have been together, we has grown to know me so well. We have met on May 8 for the first time and it has been a bit more than a month now but I feel like I have known him and needed him for all my life. It escalated quickly. I know it, but I don’t feel so. This all comes so naturally and beautifully.

“So, are you taking me home?” I ask quietly, sadly even. I asked him to take me home, yet I don’t want to go home and also his ‘okay’ was too easy. I shake my head at my own thoughts. I’m nuts.

“Yeah, I just need to call someone. Give me some 5 minutes, okay?” He says and cups my cheeks. Then he tilts my head and places a gentle kiss on my lips.

“Okay.” I obey and kiss him back. He smiles and leaves for his room. As I’m left alone, I wander around studying the various objects he has on his shelves. He has a lot of books, mostly on programming, but I also find some Sigmund Frauds, a ‘Pride and Prejudice’, a ‘One Thousand and One Nights’… He has framed photos of him and Lana, their family, him and his friends… I study his life, still without me… Did he have any idea he would fall in love again one day? Was he too different then from what he is now? It’s amazing how different we are inside from the person everyone thinks we represent. They think they know us, understand us, feel us but to every single human we are a different person and I’m not even sure we are the same person to ourselves every morning… The way I imagine Alexander… Is he too different from that? And the way he sees me… Do I deserve to be seen that way?

My steps take me to the little table that has the round vase on it. I look inside it. The earring is still there… I’m not making a fool of myself, am I? Alex cannot have lied to me. I trust him.

“I will do everything to keep you happy.” Alex says from behind me and it makes me jump. He hugs me from behind and kisses my temple. “If I have to break her heart, I will do it for you.”

“It’s for both of us.” I say quickly.

“I know baby. Now let’s go, shall we?” I nod and we leave his apartment. It’s almost midnight and I call Lily to tell her we are going there so she doesn’t freak out because of the knock. She freaks out at every noise.

“Lil, hey. You okay?” I say as we walk hand in hand to his car.

“Yeah sis, why are you calling at such a late hour?”

“I’m sorry, I just called to say Alex is bringing me home so you don’t get frightened when I try to open the door.” She exhales in relief.

“Phew! I thought something bad has happened.” I laugh.

“We are on our way. You don’t have to get up, I have my keys.”

“Okay girl.” She says and we hang up.

Alex takes his time touching my body while he’s fastening my seatbelt. He wants me to think he’s not doing it deliberately but I know his game. He’s trying me. I hesitate between playing along and giving in but his mischievous grin tells me he wants me to play along. So I do.

I put my hand on his torso and draw small circles. The taut muscles under his t-shirt clench at my touch. I hum in my most seductive voice.

“Mmm, babe?” He looks at me almost in disbelief. Now I have his full attention. “Remember when you poured tomato sauce on your shirt?” He nods curtly. I continue softly. “You removed your shirt and it was the first time I saw you naked to your torso. You have no idea how much of a turn-on it was…” He swallows… I feel my victory so close. My hand reaches for his knee and his gaze follows it. Luckily, my silent grin goes unnoticed. Then I reach towards him and my nose almost touches his neck. He takes a sharp breath in and I know he wants me so much now. It’s visible. I move a bit closer and whisper into his ear. “Two can play this game ace…” Then I place a swift kiss on his neck and move back to my seat feeling very proud of myself. He looks at me in complete awe. I grin and stick my tongue out to him playfully. In a split second his seat belt is unfastened and his mouth is on me. He tastes so good. The kiss is almost animalistic, primal. He mauls me pouring all of his need into me. Then he pulls away and we are both breathless.

“I so don’t want to take you home now.” He groans and I laugh. Anyway, he starts the car and the beautiful city guides our way to my place. He pecks at my cheek occasionally and kisses my hand while we wait for the green lights. The way to my place is cheerful and so full of love. He takes my breath away. What on the earth did I do to ever deserve such a man? He’s gorgeous, kind, intelligent, caring and loving. As I study his face I realize there’s nothing I don’t like about him. His perfect body and his beautiful soul… Can I keep him forever?

My thoughts are interrupted when he parks the car at my building. I miss him already and he hasn’t even left. We get out of the car and walk to the entrance. I face him and cup his cheeks.

“Thank you for bringing me.” I say softly. “I love you.” I place a chaste kiss on his lips and turn to go. He grips my wrist and pulls me to him in a second. I crush into his body.

“Not so quick baby. I’m coming with you.” He says and bites my cheek playfully.

“You don’t need to, really. I’ll be fine.”

“No. Come.” I roll my eyes and follow him.

He walks to my door cautiously, examining every corner. He is paranoid. Thanks to me! When we reach the door, I take my key out and try to open the door. It has always been very stubborn but this time the key doesn’t even turn… It just doesn’t work. Oh, wait, it’s open.

“It is already open.” I turn to Alexander. “Probably, Lily has left it open for me.”

Alex eyes the door suspiciously.

“Ace, don’t be paranoid, it’s okay.” I shrug. Then I hug him briefly and enter my apartment. Alex glances inside for a moment, sees it’s okay, then pecks at my lips.

“Okay. Say hi to Lily. Take care.” He says and leaves.

I look at his back till it disappears in the corridor and as I’m about to lock the door, I hear muffled cries from my living room. My heart sinks to my stomach. No, please no!