Prologue
"I can't promise you to love, and I will have no other woman but you," Juan Yihe’s voice was steady, devoid of emotion, as if the words were a contract he had signed, not a vow he was making.
At that moment, I convinced myself it was enough. I told myself that love wasn't necessary. I thought my devotion would be enough to bridge the gap between us and make our marriage whole.
But how naive I was.
Five years of enduring silence, of hoping for warmth from the man I married. Five years of waiting for him to see me, to acknowledge my presence beyond duty.
And then she came back—Lou Jiang, his first love. She returned, not alone, but with a child in tow—a boy who resembled Juan Yihe so much that it was as if fate itself had carved the child from his very flesh.
I watched in silence as my world fell apart.
"She’s trying to make her child the heir of the Juan family," Yihe said matter-of-factly, like a business arrangement. There was no shame, no guilt, no hint that he had already torn my heart apart.
It was then I realized I was done. I had no more love left to give, no more hope that Juan Yihe would ever look at me like he once looked at her.
"Let’s get a divorce," I said.
The words slipped out so easily, yet they were soaked in years of pain. The weight of unrequited love crashed down, finally lifting the burden from my heart.
His expression faltered. Juan Yihe’s eyes showed something other than cold indifference for the first time in five years: shock. Panic. His voice, usually so measured, trembled slightly.
"What?" He asked, as though he couldn’t understand the simple word.
I had spent so long waiting for him to react, to care. And now that he did, I felt nothing but a bittersweet relief.
“I want to leave you,” I repeated, softer this time, more certain. “So, Yihe, let’s stop now. I’m tired of waiting for you to love me, even just a little. I want a divorce.”
Juan Yihe's eyes shook violently. The words, so simple yet final, hit him like a cold wind. But it was too late. I had spent five years clinging to the idea that if I loved him enough, he would eventually love me back.
But I was wrong.
In those five years, I had lost myself in a love that was never returned. My heart broke every time I watched him look at me like a stranger, every time I caught the wistful look in his eyes when he thought of her.
Now, I have finally made my decision. I could no longer stand by and watch them together, not when Lou Jiang had returned with a child who resembled him. It was like a knife twisting in my chest.
I deserved better than this. I deserved to reclaim my life to find peace, even if it meant walking away from everything I had invested in for five years.
"I’ll leave," I said, “I’ll leave you, and this relationship only brings me pain.”
Juan Yihe opened his mouth to speak and protest, but I had already decided. He could have fought for me, but he didn’t. Not then, not when it mattered most.
That was the end.
And as I walked away, there was no looking back. No more waiting. No more hoping. It was time for me to reclaim my life, my heart, and my future.
