Hidden Sanity

Odd Phase

Jack went to the office after. Well-groomed and composed. When he just sat in his chair, the vice president entered his office and told him about the rumor spreading around the whole office.

"Sir Jorge, what have you been up to? This might affect the image of our company."

Jack, looking so confident, did not even look at him and kept himself busy from reading the newspaper laid on his table. "What did I do?"

"You and Ms. Alice Simone. What’s with both of you?"

He immediately looked at him as soon as he heard him say her name. "Why?"

"You went to her house last night, right? It was very late. What is going on? What are you two up to?"

He dodged it right away. "It was a rushed business task I asked her to do."

"And so that's the reason why you got out of her house in the morning? Too long of a task then."

He curled his eyebrows. "Who is creating all of this? Where did this all come from?"

"Unknown source."

"As far as I know, I applied for a presidential job, not a celebrity's. Why do they need to dig up all this?" He didn't react too much to it. Like he was not affected at all.

"What do we do about this then? It's unstoppable. It can spread outside the company and ruin our image for being unprofessional."

"Then hire an outsource to stop it!"

"This is dangerous, sir. What is really going on between you two?"

"Alice is my secretary. We're close like that. Nothing is going on between us. Please keep off your dirty minds in this, you filthy peasants." Now, he sounded angry.

The vice president got a little bit nervous because of it. He knows Jack when he's angry. "I just want safety for this company, sir."

"Everything is safe. Now get out!" He furiously pointed to the door and waited for him to step out of his office.

"What about the rumors?"

"Let them spread! Rumors are spread by fools!" He irately stated while reading an article from the newspaper.

"Yes, sir." He stepped out of his office and instantly hired an outsource to stop the rumors even though the president didn't insist for the order.

When the vice president was already out of his office, it gave Jack a moment to think. "f**k! Who is behind all this?! So I will be a candidate for being a suspect if ever I succeeded in my plan for Alice?! No, I can't let it happen... Not like this... Let me give that person what he or she wants, I will let him or her get what he or she deserves."

But Jack didn't let it beat him up.  He knew when to rise in his own game.

An hour later, Alice just arrived at the office and Jack saw her from the window. She sat on her chair, looking very serious. He was observing her. But he can't just distance himself from her like that, he needed to step his game up. He went out of his office and walked toward Alice's table.

All eyes were lent on him and Alice.

Jack ignored them all. He talked to her and said, "Hey,"

Alice looked at him and wondered why he's acting like that in front of many people. They are supposed to have it like that, exclusively. "Uhh, Good Morning, sir."

"Lunch later?"

Alice was signaling through her eyes that he shouldn't be talking like that, not in front of their officemates. Looked like she had no idea about the rumors yet.

"I'll be inviting the executive officers as well. Where's Morrie?"

"Got it, sir. Uh, Morrie is not here yet."

"When she arrives, tell her I personally invited all of you to have lunch together."

"Alright."

"'Kay." He walked his way back to his office and gently closed the door.

He acted perfectly faultless. He kept his head up in all things. He knew he could never lose.

Alice wondered what it is with Jack that he's doing that. Jack must be diving into surges to make something happen and Alice is so oblivious about it. She didn't mind it anyway and just continued her job until lunch time.

As the clock hit 12, Jack went out from his office and just stood in front of his door and waited for the executive officers to come over. He's just not the type to come over to them and fetch them to come with him for lunch. If they don't want to come, Jack doesn't care. It was nothing to him anyway.

When Alice saw him standing, she stood up right away and told the other executive officers that they better get going.

They gathered and followed Jack's steps until the outside of the office. He opened the door of his car and said, "Get a seat," and entered.

Upon their ride to the restaurant they're going to, Jack was not speaking. The vice president was beside the driver's seat and he can't keep on thinking about the rumors spreading around now that Alice is with them and he couldn't help but think malicious thoughts about them.

No one was talking. No one had the guts to, especially when they feel like their boss was not in a good mood.

Just when they arrived at the restaurant, it was completely awkward. But they can tell, that Jack was not so stale in picking restaurants. He's got class, well, away from his high rate of profit, he also got good taste in foods.

Jack spoke, "Pick a dish. I'll pay."

"Wow, it's not even payday," Alice replied.

Jack just looked at her as if she had made the mistake of saying something. She felt embarrassed and just kept quiet after. He was damned serious at that moment.

The vice president asked, "What is the treat for?"

"Nothing... I just want a little bit of a good time."

"A good time?" He thought of a way to make it good. It is harder than it looks because first, Jack was so unapproachable and second, there's no fun at the place he chose. There has to be an ice breaker. He said "Alice, what do you want to order?"

He thought that because of Jack's growing ego and outrageous personality, Alice could tone it down and save the act.

"Anything, just not an alive octopus or something."

They laughed. She's obviously trying to make the feel lighter than it seemed. And so it went like that, pretty much quiet because no one dared to talk, but it's bearable. When the food was served on their table, Alice was so happy. So glad that she wouldn't make much effort in talking already because all of them will get food stuck in their mouth.

They all ate and Jack finally spoke for the first time after almost an hour. "If ever all of you here now heard about the issues, please don't believe them. I don't do such things."

Alice didn't know what he was talking about. The PR Manager said, "But is it true?"

"I don't do things that will dishonor my position. Not a chance. I'm an oriented man. I keep things clean."

Morrie, who wasn't talking lately, suddenly stood up and said, "Excuse me. I'll just go to the comfort room." She walked away. Jack's eyes followed her and he knew the reason straight away.

Morrie can't take the lies coming out from Jack's mouth, especially when she knew that they were doing something malevolent before. Very opposite of what Jack's saying. She's mad at him, not because he denied it and lied, of course he had to, but her real reason is, she's sick of seeing Jack. Even the sight of him disgusted her, the sound of his voice infuriated her. She didn't want him around anymore particularly now that he knew about him and Alice.

Nobody minded Morrie leaving the table. It was an effective excuse anyhow. The officers were talking to each other. Busy chattering about their personal lives, having a good time. Trying really hard to have it. For not so long, Jack excused himself as well. "I'll wash my hands." He walked away and he was headed to the comfort room in the corner, near to where Morrie is.

He waited for Morrie to get out of the comfort room. He was leaning his back against the wall and facing the door. When Morrie got out, she was surprised because Jack was just standing in front of her. She looked down and tried to walk back to their table and avoid him but Jack stuck his arm out to keep her in her position. He said "Why are you avoiding me?"

"Everything is over between us, Jorge."

He tilted his head to the right and wondered. "What is over?"

"You can't just use me again like that. Can't you remember what you did to me?!"

"Keep your voice down!" He hushed her by putting a finger on top of her lips.

She muttered. "You are a hypocrite! A radical person. Admit it, Jorge! You are... a f*****g bad person!"

"No, come on..." He walked closer to her. He put his arms in her back and wrapped it around her waist.

"Don't touch me." She tried to remove Jack's hand in her body but he's too strong. His grip was too tight. He was close to hugging her. All of a sudden, he placed his head on the side of her head and whispered in her ear.

"I know you love me, Morrie. Want me more than anyone else... My lips are your favorite... They are your sugar..." He was staring down at her with his dazzling green eyes. "It's only just a simple fascination, it'll go away. Just like other things in this world, it will go away... But that's what you thought. It grows more and more... Eventually, it will...... You can't resist me."

"Let go of me," she grumbled, still trying to run away from his arms.

His head lowered down a bit and his mouth aimed for her neck. He was murmuring words. She can feel his breath crawling in her skin.  

"What if I tell you, I want to hold you close like this? Your skin pressed tight against mine. My soft breath entering your mouth...... Isn't that lovely? Doesn't it feel so right? Tell me..."

"How could I believe you again after almost killing me! You are hurting people, Jorge! You are not far from being a murderer."

"So now you're judging me?" He moved away from her and looked at her straight in the eyes with such resentment in his face. Confusion in his eyes.

"Yes! And that's true... You will get caught soon, Jorge! What you're doing... to me and to all the other girls you f**k with! I don't care who they are! Don't let me spill it... Don't wait for me to!" She attempted to walk away because Jack's grasp yielded a bit. But Jack pulled her hair hard to make her come back to him and make her lean the wall. It hurt Morrie.

"Get your hands off me!", she nagged as she's trying to take his hands out of her hair.

He drew his face inches away from hers and said, "You will not tell anybody about this! You don't know what I'm capable of... You don't know me." His eyes gazed at hers. "Be careful what you do... I am keeping my eyes on you. I can do something more than this... more than what you got from me. This is a warning. Pay attention to it."

Morrie wasn't able to say anything again. She ended up speechless again. Maybe his charisma got her again. Maybe she just wanted him so bad that she can't help but to feel weak in her knees and be shaken by his presence. She stayed still until Jack started to kiss her passionately. She kissed back and Jack made a smile while their lips are intact. He knew Morrie would give in so easily.

So then he pushed her inside the comfort room while intensely kissing her neck. He locked the door after.

Too much tongue. Those rules about it don't mean nothing now. She just wanted his kiss.

Morrie won't be able to stand on her feet if it weren't for her clutch in the sink while Jack was doing her from behind.

They lasted for only about 4 minutes. If Jack didn't initiate to stop, Morrie would have got more into it. But they're with their officemates for lunch so they have to go back there before they start searching for the both of them and suspect.

Jack said while pulling up his pants. "Go back first, I'll follow after a few."

"Okay." She wore her underwear and pulled down her dress and fixed herself in the mirror. As she twisted the knob to go out, he said "This answers yes for a deal, I guess. Again, don't tell anyone and I can be good to you for as long as you want."

"Got it." She went out of the comfort room and walked back to the table.

Everything seemed normal because no one saw them, heard them or at least felt like there's already something going on between them.

In a few minutes, Jack sat back in his seat and said "So, what did I miss?" Trying his best not to make eye contact with Morrie or else it will look very suspicious. Morrie was doing the same.

After that lunch meeting with the officemates, Jack already knew what he really wanted and what are the next steps to take.

A day after that, Jack kept his thing with Alice going on. It lengthened to a week.

He can never feel guiltier. Seeing Alice two or three nights a week which was a lot for him.

And then there has been quite a few changes in Jack's actions after that. He's not talking much to Alice anymore. No calls. No private meetings in the office. No coming over to her house. Not a single visit in her apartment. He got busy. Nobody knows what he's up to.

Probably an excuse for a gateway to a new plan.

He's precisely developing another personality.

Alice did not see Jack for a week already. So it left her more time with Joe. She often goes out with Joe, mostly at night, anywhere under a roof.

It's a cold night in Alice's house. It was the breeze of the Northeastern Monsoon.

Alice went to the kitchen to grab a snack for them to eat. But then she saw the note that her mysterious killer wrote, it sent her goosebumps all over her body. It can't stop her from thinking that he's still around, eyeing her up until now. She just can't look at the dark corners of their house or even at the dark street outside. She didn't want to see the face of a gruesome person, hiding behind the shadows.

She crumpled it and was about to throw it into the trash bin but she thought that she could use it as a form of evidence in case the situation gets any deeper and reaches to court. She walked toward the living room with a snack and she sat beside Joe on the sofa.

"Joe, do you think Kinley could be anywhere around my place here?"

If Joe didn't care about Alice, he could've been so sick about her complaining about the same thing again and again. It was Jack Kinley again. But he cared so he could tolerate her actions about it. "I think it's possible but there are no signs."

"There are signs!"

"Then where is it?"

Alice realized that she can't show it to Joe because Joe will keep on asking what the said-to-be killer is watching and more about what it says on the note. Joe is a smart man. Very logical. He'll know the truth. He could guess it with just a snap.  

"I can just feel it..."

Joe stared at her and watched her facial expressions. Wondering maybe why Alice is acting like that. One time, she's very sure about it then next time, she wasn't. He said "I'm not trying to trivialize your concerns, here, Alice, but I really think we've got nothing to worry about." Joe leaned back on the sofa. A cool breeze from the open door of the balcony blew inside the house.

Alice pulled her bare feet up and tucked them beneath her on the cushioned glider. She clutched her zip-up gray sweatshirt, not sure if she was cold or if fear made her shiver. The left side of her brain totally agreed with Joe. It wasn't right that Kinley could still kill. It wasn't fair. Wasn't fair if there are FBI's searching for him. But the right side of her brain, her instinct tells that she couldn't just shrug it off.  "You're right," Alice said. "I know you're right." She stood up and looked across the balcony. "But what if you're wrong?"

"If it will make you feel safer Alice, I'll stay with you all the time."

She pressed her lips together, thinking that was all she needed right now. She was just learning how to be on her own, to depend on herself. "Joe---"

"Alice, for how many years would I stay like this to you?" He wanted to know his standing for Alice.

His tone was close to begging, and she didn't want to make him beg. Didn't want to hear him beg. "Joe," she said softly. "Let's not get into this tonight."

He walked closer to her and slid his arm around her shoulder and she didn't shrug it off. Right now, she could use a hug.

"Whatever happens, I'm always here. Okay?"

"That's your way to convince me that you're a good guy and I should date you?" She teased.

Joe chuckled. He was grinning like the office guy she had fallen in love with her first year at the company. He was so damned handsome. Could be so charming.

"No, it's all right," she said, going back to their topic. "He's been out for almost months and he hasn't been a confirmed suspect for any murders yet. He couldn't be killing... maybe not again or maybe just not yet. I'm just paranoid. Just paranoid," she repeated, as if she could convince herself by merely speaking the words.

Alice wished she could prolong the moment with Joe's arm around her shoulders. She loved Joe's warmth. But then she could not stop thinking about the happenings in her life. Still fearing that Jack can see them right now. That Joe might be in danger too.

Joe talked. "Alice... Can we go out again every night?"

"It's too dangerous outside, Joe. I can't even go anywhere except to my apartment."

He slid his arm off her. "What, so I'm not enough? Is that what you're trying to say?" His mood changed.

"Hey, it's not like that. I just got a handwritten letter from him. I guess that suggests that he's following me wherever I go. He is watching me. I don't want you to get involved in this."

"Yeah... but he can?"

"Who?"

"Our president."

"He is our boss, Joe. Please don't think like that."

"How is it possible that I couldn't get involved? I was there first with you. I helped you first... I helped you find people related to Jack Kinley, because I want us both to have time together at least. Because you wouldn't pay attention to me if it weren't for that murderer!" It seemed like it had just flipped his switch.

"Joe, you can't understand me no matter what I say huh? Be in my shoes!"

"I am trying to be! But every time I do, you are ignoring me like I don't exist in your priorities. You are pushing me away from your life!" He started raising his voice.

"So if I got killed, do you think we'll have time together?" She raised her eyebrows.

Joe got hushed.

They were both staring at each other until Joe moved away and walked to the balcony to breathe some fresh air. They were too close to fighting. It happened so quickly just because of the involvement of Jorge.

Alice didn't talk to him first. It was an awkward silence between them. There was a massive space of silence between them that lasted for minutes. Alice hated the silent therapy. She hates it when she has to think of what to do and worry about what he's thinking as of now.

She went back to the kitchen area and drank some water to relax. Maybe if she wasn't too frantic about the situation, it wouldn't have happened.

But maybe she had a reason to be and this was really meant to happen.

She badly wanted to snap off the idea forming in her head. She needed to do something different to amuse herself.

She called Jack. It was stupid. She knew her decision was very stupid. She doesn't know what she's doing. Didn't know that this could lead to a bigger fire since she called the source of it.

He answered after so many minutes. It was a long wait for Alice.

"Hey..."

She felt strange after hearing his voice after a week of not hearing or seeing him.

"Hey Jorge, listen, can we talk later tonight? Or tomorrow if you've got something going on?" she added.

"Oh, you can call me later. Call as late as you want." It gave her a different kind of mood. It always happens every time she's talking to him.

She smiled again and didn't know why. "What, no hot date tonight?"

He laughed. "Just me, my computer files and my pasta salad."

She laughed with him. "Busy huh... Okay then. I'll call you later. Nine-ish?"

"Talk to you then, Alice."

"Who was that?" Joe asked as she hung up. She was taken aback by Joe's sudden nudge. He leaned his shoulder on the doorway of the kitchen area. She was not expecting that he got there so fast and that he was listening to her conversation with someone else.

She felt like telling him it was none of his damned business who it was, but she still answered. "Our CEO, why?"

"Getting pretty friendly with a man who used you to make a buck, aren't you?"

Alice studied Joe's face for a moment. If she didn't know better, she'd think she felt jealousy through his voice.  He's clearly jealous. "He volunteered to dig up some info on Kinley for me, and he was calling me back, that's all." She walked to the balcony of her house where he just came from and Joe followed her.

"What? Is he hoping Kinley's on another murder spree? Hoping to hit on you someday?"

Alice frowned. She hadn't really thought about Jack's motivation, but she had no intention of discussing it with Joe. "No," she answered. "He's just being nice."

Joe rolled his eyes. "Alice, you're so naive. No man does something just to be nice. He either wants your benefit to our company or wants to get into your shorts."

"That's ridiculous."

"Not any more ridiculous than your refusing to consider the possibility."

Alice ignored him. The air between them started to change again.

"Listen," Joe said, obviously trying to make an effort to speak more calmly. "I'm not trying to tell you what to do. I know better than that. But I think you're getting a little obsessed with this murder case of Kinley. You need to take a step back and take a good hard look at what you're doing. Maybe you need to talk to someone." He wants to make up with her.

"I thought you weren't going to tell me what to do." She continued to gaze over the view in front of her house, refusing to meet his eyes. "You think I need a shrink?"

"Alice, forget it." He scuffed his shoe in the floor and walked away.

"Don't be upset, Joe. Don't end it like this."

Joe looked back at her and said "How am I supposed to? You won't listen to what I say!"

"Because I just can't do anything you say!", she shouted.

Then Joe was shocked. He said something under his breath, not being able to speak it up.

Alice glanced at him. "What?"

He raised both hands to her as if surrendering. "Fine."

He walked out.

She watched him stomp away, and a part of her wanted to follow him. But she stayed where she was.

She never wanted to fight with Joe. Joe was special for Alice.

As the hours passed by, she thought of what Joe said. She realized that he had a point, that he made sense about everything he said to her. Maybe she was overacting, maybe she was too selfish not to listen to someone else's advice...... to Joe's advice.

She needed someone right now. She needed words of comfort to make herself believe that she at least did something right. She felt responsible for Joe's frustration and what made it worse is that she can't do something about it. She wanted to talk to someone. There's only one person on Alice's mind when it comes to comforting.

She called Jack.

It was 9 already anyway.

She called him twice but there's no response.

She thought that maybe he's too busy so he can't pick up her call or got his phone on silent so he didn't notice or intentionally put his phone away from him so he won't get disturbed with his computer works.

She felt alone.

"Who do I run to now?", she said.

It was a cold evening and it even got colder now. She hates it when she makes people upset because of her. It made her overthink. She wanted to apologize but Joe's temper lately shows that he just can't talk to her like how he used to for now.

Hours have passed.

Joe went back to his house, threw his clothes to his bed then sat on the edge. He sighed and checked his phone in case he got text messages from Alice but there's none. He wanted her but he didn't like how she acted lately. He felt unimportant to Alice, like his opinion doesn't even matter. He wanted to call her and say sorry but his pride told him not to.

Besides, they both need space.

And while Alice was figuring everything out by herself, on the other hand, Jack walked around his loft picking up the clothes he'd shed in the heat of the moment. He tossed them into the laundry basket and pulled on a clean pair of gray boxer briefs from his dresser drawer. He took the two wine glasses from the bedside tables and carried them to the kitchen sink.

Noreen had just left. She had to be at work early tomorrow morning for an editorial meeting and she wasn't ready.

Sheena had introduced them at a party a week ago. He actually felt a little guilty about seeing Noreen. Not guilty enough to sleep with her though.

Jack ran water in the wine glasses and swirled it around to rinse them out. He'd been feeling edgy last week. He had thought he might be growing bored with the other girls from the office he spent his nights with.

But when he had met Noreen at the corner of the pub for a beer, when she had greeted him with a warm smile and a kiss, it hadn't been Noreen he had seen in his mind's eye. It was another woman.

Alice.

He couldn't get her out of his head and couldn't for the life of him get himself away from it. But he can't be spending his whole time with her. He had to have his own leisure sometimes too. His own way to have fun. Sleeping with other girls will solve his issues. He liked it in some ways. It gave him happiness in some ways. It became habitual.

Later on, when everything else around his house was back to the way it was, like nothing happened, he called Alice after seeing her missed calls.

Within seconds, she answered.

"Hey," Jack said with a sleepy voice. Of course, he had to get his acts straight so she would believe everything, so he could manipulate her.

"Hey, uhm, you done with your work?", she had spoken with a lonely voice.

"Not yet... What's up with that voice? You have something to tell me?" His voice really was comforting. Alice felt the warmth in his voice, that soft, serene and deep voice with such concern.

"I just feel like talking to someone right now. I'm sorry. I know you shouldn't get involved with this."

"What's your problem, sweetie?"

"But are you sure this is okay? You still have many things to do, right?"

"How could I reject you? Tell me. Who would dare to reject someone like you? That's clearly not me."

"You didn't answer my calls lately. Isn't that a form of rejection?" She frankly spoke.

He chuckled. "Ah, I was not looking at my phone because I was too focused on my computer screen and my papers. I just knew now that you called twice. Come on, minor reason..."

"I see."

It was his first time to hear her voice like that. Very lonely and unusual.

"Hey, you want me to come over and let's talk about it? Whatever you're going through..."

"No, I just want to talk to you... even just hearing your voice is enough."

"Don't you want to see me?" He sounded sulky. He surely knew how to flirt.

"What?" She smiled like an i***t to what he just said. Glad that Jack can't see her so she won't make a fool out of herself in front of him.

"Don't you want me?"

"What are you saying?"

He gusted air from his nose and gave a short laugh. "I'm just kidding. What's your problem?"

"Have you ever felt so guilty about doing something to someone that it bugs you the whole night?"

Her words had an impact on him. He felt more guilty about what he's doing. Lying to Alice. Womanizing. But he had less guilt to feel the same way Alice does right now.

"Is there anything that happened?" He sounded so clueless.

"I just fought with someone and I don't want us acting so cold with each other. I just don't want something to change between us. I think I... I made a mistake."

"Your best friend?"

"Nope."

Jack didn't reply and he seemed muted to her answer.

"Jorge?" Alice asked.

"That........ that makes me feel jealous a bit, you know...Knowing that it's not your best friend, meaning, it's another person and I have this feeling that it's a man."

"You don't need to be jealous, Jorge." Alice didn't mind the idea and just shrugged it off. She knew that he's just kidding. He loves joking.

He laughed. "So what about this person?"

"I want to apologize... I..." She sighed. "I don't even know if I should be saying these things to you... I'm sorry, I just really need someone right now."

"Wow. And you chose me?"

"What, you didn't like it? I mean, duhh."

He laughed. "You're really sexy when you do that. Those forthright comments of yours."

She giggled.

"God! Goodness gracious! I want you here."

"Just do your work first." She teased.

"I only want you."

"Really huh?" She always falls for his flirting style.

"Yes, you."

"Too bad, you have too much stuff to work onto right now."

"Can't you stay awake with me while I make them?"

"What are we? Teens? Come on, we both know that we can't focus on something when we get our attention to other things."

"So Ms. Simone, are you trying to say that you don't need me right now and I should hang this up?"

"That's not what I meant, Mr. Kione."

"Hah... Whatever it is, forget about it. You can't sleep with all those worries. In order for you to sleep, stop worrying about it. That simple. Don't think of anything right now and just enjoy the moment. Have an ice cream or something."

"Thanks." She stared at the floor, rethinking what happened lately with her and Joe.

"Stay calm, okay? I thought you were strong? Prove me."

She didn't talk back.

"Alice? Let's talk about it tomorrow, okay? Me and you, in my office."

"Okay."

"I need to finish everything first... then I'll get back to you."

"Alright. Good luck!"

After he hung up, he proceeded to his bedroom, removed the bed sheet and held it with one hand.

He looked at the blood stains in it. "Jesus Christ..."

He briskly threw it to the laundry basket. "f**k, I hate virgins."

He went to his living room and sat on the sofa. He leaned his head on the backrest and rested. His hips felt tired because of what he did with Noreen lately. He just wanted to sit until he fell asleep. He stared at the ceiling and thought, "This is nice..." His smile slowly showed. "Really nice."

He's enjoying the taste of others as well. He loved the feeling to the extent. Perhaps, it's a change in his plans or maybe still a part of it. Well, he knows better.