The Influence of Moon

Normal is boring. And I hate boring. I wish I could choose what kind of different I would be. But… I didn't have the chance. So I became what I am now. Today. What I am? I'm not human, vampire, werewolf, witch or whatever. I'm everything, but nothing. And I am the only one of my kind. My name is Fiona. My name is supposed to describe me. It means white and fair. But I don't think I am any of that. My life is a total mess. I was engaged once. But he hung himself. I knew him since we were kids. We were best friends since kindergarten and he was the only one who knew about Hannah, my fairy, which is kind of my pet, best friend and my guardian angel. But three years ago he started with dealing drugs and taking some. He also wanted me to take some but I refused. I tried to convince him that drugs are no good for him. "I know but it is easy money" he always said and smiled stupidly. I loved that smile. After a year of trying to get him rid of the drugs, I made an ultimatum. Either the drugs or me. One will go and one will stay. "If you are being such a b***h I rather choose the drugs. At least they make me happy as distinct of you" this broke my heart. I hoped he would love me more than his easy money drugs. I had to let him go. It wasn't easy but I knew I made the right decision for myself. If he already now chooses the drugs over me, he wouldn't make a loving, great husband especially for a species as I am. But this wasn't the end of our story. I was lying in my bed, on the side he used to sleep. I went back to the days we were back together. I lived without him for half a year. Not even knowing if he was still alive. It was midnight when I got a text from an unknown number saying 'please open the door we need to talk.' I still remember the feeling I got. As I came down and opened the door at this raining night, I saw him again. He was wet, malnourished and pale. "Hey, what a surprise. Come in. What is going on? Where were you?" I had a million questions in a second. He stepped inside and looked at me. "Sit down I'll get you a towel," I ordered him and went for a towel. As I gave it to him, I felt how cold he was and finally realized he was freezing. Quite unusual to be so cold in summer. "I'll make you some cocoa." We loved to drink coco when we couldn't sleep or were cold. Later I gave him dry clothes and a blanket. "F, we need to talk," he said with a desperate voice. As he said that, I looked at him for the first time. He seemed hopeless and depressed. "What's wrong?" I asked. "I need your help," he whispered. In his eyes was written, he doesn't see any way to solve the problem he had but hoped that I could help. "How can I help you? I'll do whatever I can," He took my hand in his and started crying. "Hey, we will get through it no matter what it is. We always did." He hugged me and I froze for a few seconds. Afterwards, I hugged him back. "I got addicted to drugs and I can't get back out. I don't know how to get rid of it. How not need them anymore. How to get rid of the people. Help me please!" My heart broke. Again. "I'm sorry I didn't listen to you before. I am sorry I chose drugs over you. A day hasn't gone by when I didn't miss you, thought of you or wished you were with me. I am sorry for everything. I promise I will listen to you and do whatever you'll say just forgive me and help me, please! I need you now more than ever before!” He kept crying on, apologizing and asking for help. After a while, when I realized that he won't stop crying, begging or apologizing I chose to answer him. "As I told you before. We will get through it no matter what. We did it once, we did it twice, we did it a hundred times and we will do it again. Just calm down now and then we will go up to my room so you can get some sleep okay?" He nodded and we went up to my room to sleep. In the morning, I realized it wasn't a dream as I thought first. He slept there, safe and sound, in my arms. His black hair messed up and his breathing so calm. I watched him as I noticed he's got scars all over his back. I went with my left hand over these scares and as I reached the newest one, touching it awoke him. "don't look at this" he said angrily. "why not?" I don't see a problem in it? "it is none of your business. I shouldn't have come here. It was a mistake." He continued angrily trying to stand up. As he turned around, I saw even bruises. "Taylor last night you didn't think it was a mistake. You seemed relieved I accepted you back without any hesitation." "Oh, shut up. I was high. If I were sober, I would never come here." He answered. "but you came high and now you are sober still here talking to me and you know you made a better decision high than you are doing sober. Taylor, don't push me away again. You know as much as I do that we are best when we are together." I tried to find the words to keep him here but I didn’t want to push it too far. "Liar" he labelled me. "Do I lie or are you afraid? Do you think I lie when I say I still love you? That I still miss you? That I still dream about you? Do you really think I could forget so easily about you?" he turns around and puts his hands in fists. I try really slow, step by step, to get to him. "you really think it is so easy to forget someone you were supposed to marry? We grew up together! My parent took you in as if you were their sun! So did your parents with me! Do you really think that anyone and I mean ANYONE turned their back on you? Everyone misses you. Your mum is still crying her eyes out. So does Anna. Do you remember your little sister? The one you adored so much! She keeps coming to me asking when is her big brother coming back home. Every single time she cries on my chest, and I promise her you'll come home soon. Do you need help? Okay, I will help you. We will get through this addiction. We will get you out of the streets. We will get you back in your own life." I saw him shaking. I hoped it was because I got to him. "We can do everything together. As we always did." With one hand I took his hand with the other one I pushed his chin so high so he had to look me in the eyes. And those eyes scared me but I wasn't allowed to show him. I had to be stronger so he could get his s**t back together. "Look me in the eye and tell me you don't miss Anna. Look me in the eye and tell me you don't miss our parents." I breathe deeply, hoping I moved something in him. "I don't miss Anna or our parents," he answered with pain in his eyes and anger in his voice. "If you say so. Then tell me this, looking into my eyes. Do you miss me? Do you love me? Don't you want a happy life with me?” I admit this was my last joker. “Why do you keep pushing me? f**k! Of course, I miss my little sister! Of course, I miss my parents and hell yeah I miss you and I’ll be damned if I would say I don’t love you! But it is too late for me! All I can do for anyone of you is bring you to suffer, hatred and pain! I am not worthy of any of you! I f****d it all up the second I chose the drugs over you! s**t! Get away from me! I don’ want to…” it is easier to shut up a man with an unexpected kiss. But this was way more than just a kiss. It was the key to calm him down. It was the sun in his world, he missed so much. It was the strength I got to pull him out of this mess. It was the recovery of the bond we had. The butterflies in my stomach started to fly again. The reason why I fought so much got clear. I got him back. The first and hardest step has been done. And we were united again. Side by side as it was supposed to be all along. “Fio…” my little sister Sophie came into my room. The second we heard her we stepped away from each other. “Taylor! You are back!” she screamed, ran to him and hugged him. The look on his face was priceless. First, he looked confused but then he realized what is going on and hugged her back. Of course, she screamed loud enough that my parents heard her and came to my room too. “O my, it really is you,” said my mum and hugged him “we were worried,” she said putting her hand on his cheek. “don’t you dare ever to do something like this to my daughter again,” said my father and hugged him too. Taylor was speechless. Obviously, he didn’t expect such a welcome. Probably he didn't know he meant so much to all of us. “Can I call Anna and tell her Tay is back?” asked Sophie my mum with her puppy eyes no one could resist. “sure, honey. Is it okay with you Taylor?” Everyone looked at him. I look out of the window “you better make a choice quick, cause Anne is here.” Now everyone looked at the window and I guess I was the only one who realized he was fighting with himself. “my I open the door?” he asked. My mum looked at me and I nodded. This is it. He is 100% back. He is mine again. As he walked out of the room Sophie hugged me and whispered “I knew you were right and he’ll come back” she smiled at me and we all went down to see how Anne will react when she sees her brother after a long time. We all stayed at the background and left them their moment. The second the bell rung he opened the door. She stood there looking at him. “Hey Ann,” he said. That smile on her face she made is the biggest smile I have ever seen. She hugged him crying and laughing repeatedly saying “Taylor you are back! This is real. O my God you are back!” after a couple of minutes he put her down and came to me. “You know, if you didn’t want to have me here you could just say instead of cry,” he said and put a lock of my hair behind my ear. As always when he did this, he smiled, with that stupid smile I loved so much and kissed me. And at the moment where our lips touched the world disappeared. The 6 Months were gone and I was in heaven. With him. All my dreams came true. “ahem..” I heard somewhere in the room. I saw my mother-in-law waiting to hug her son. We looked at her. I felt he took my hand and played with it nervously. “Don’t worry, it is your mum. I’ll be right here” He looked at me again and I nodded and gave him a little smile. This encouraged him to step towards her “my baby boy” she said, crying and hugging him. As my parents are, we had to celebrate his comeback so we had a picnic.