Color Me Crazy

Chapter 19

All is fair in love and war, is what everyone says. But I lost the person who was meant for me. I loved him, I still love him. I've never told him but I've been falling for him and I don't even know if he feels the same. He loves Jamia and not me. He doesn't want to marry me. My whole life has been focused on finding my soulmate, finding the person who helps me see the colors. But now that I have no chance with him, there's nothing really left for me to do. I hadn't planned anything, no colleges or jobs. All I've ever thought about is finding Frank.

I was walking down the hallway at school that afternoon. I didn't even have my backpack, it's still left at Frank's house. I saw Eliza walk up to me, a small smile on her face.

“Hey, Gee, are you alright?” She asked, walking beside me. “You were pretty upset when I saw you two days ago.”

“I'm fine,” I muttered.

“Have you thought about whether or not your soulmate are really meant to be?” Eliza asked.

“I have and I don't think we are,” I said. “I broke things off between us. He isn't good for me, I was sneaking around and lying to my own mother and grandmother. I don't like doing that. Things are better off if we just pretended we never bumped into each other that day at the store.”

Eliza nodded, looking over at me.

“Sorry things didn't turn out the way wanted them to,” she apologized.

I shook my head, looking down at my feet.

“Anyways, do you wanna go on a date with me?” I asked.

Eliza stopped walking and I looked back at her shocked face.

“Y-you really mean it?” She asked. “You're not messing with me?”

“We can go to the diner,” I offered.

She pulled me into a tight hug, giggling happily. Eliza pulled away, kissing my cheek. I don't think I've ever seen her smile so big. I felt a hand on my arm pulling me away.

“Hey, what the hell?” Eliza complained, turning and walking away in annoyance

I looked at Lindsey, who was pulling me down the hall with Bert by her side. They stopped once we got into a more empty hallway.

“Why the hell were you talking to Eliza?” Lindsey asked. “She's a total creep.”

“I was a creep too when I met Frank,” I said.

“Well, what were you talking about?” Bert asked.

“I was asking her on a date,” I stated.

“What are you talking about? What about Frank?” Lindsey questioned.

“He chose Jamia over me,” I stated. “I'm just trying to forget him now.”

Lindsey looked slightly panic-stricken. “N-no, that's not how it works. You and Frank are supposed to be together.”

“Why does it matter?” I asked.

“Because you two are soulmates,” she said. “If even people who are meant to be soulmates don't work out then what are the chances that my soulmate and I will work? That doesn't give me much hope.”

“Well yeah, soulmates don't necessarily work they're all f****d up,” I said. “If I were you I wouldn't even bother trying to find your soulmate.”

Lindsey looked slightly hurt but Bert stepped between us.

“Okay, so tell me what happened exactly,” he said.

“Frank is getting married in nine days,” I said. “I told him to choose.”

“So why would he choose Jamia over you?” Bert asked.

“He couldn't, he still wanted us both and couldn't decide,” I said. “I decided for him because I didn't want to live this lie anymore, especially not when he was getting married. That's a big thing that cheating matters a lot more. He's always wanted to marry her, he loves her but he doesn't love me.”

“Why Eliza?” Bert asked.

“She's the one person who does love me,” I stated.

“But why Eliza?” He asked. “She's always just been a bitch.”

“Not always, mostly just when you two are around and act bitchy to her,” I said. “She helped me the other day, she's not that bad. Yeah, she's still a little bit crazy but so was I with Frank.”

“But--”

“Bert, it's over between us,” I interrupted. “You were unhappy about him cheating so he won't be doing that anymore, guess that should make you happy.”

“But I also want you to be happy,” Bert said softly.

“Well, I guess I'll just have to find happiness somewhere else,” I said. “Now, I've gotta get to class, I'll see you all later.”

I turned and walked away, going to my last hour. It went by slowly until we were finally released. I met Eliza and she looked just so happy. She wore a black t-shirt with black ripped jeans. It was definitely in contrast with my light pink dress. At least, that's what it said on the tag, I couldn't actually see it. I drove the two of us to the diner and we got a seat in one of the corner booths.

“I'm glad you asked me to come on a date with you,” she admitted, spinning her straw in her soda.

I nodded, not knowing what else to say.

“So, why'd you end things with your soulmate?” Eliza asked.

“Things weren't working between us,” I said.

“Well, I'm glad that maybe now we can have a chance together,” she said.

I nodded and she scooted a little closer to me.

“You're really pretty,” she said.

“Thanks,” I muttered, looking down at my lap.

Hayley came over, giving us our food. The two of us ate quietly, not knowing exactly what to say.

“Okay, can I be honest?” Eliza asked and I nodded. “I have been dreaming of going on this date since, like, middle school and I'm seriously just really happy right now.”

“I'm happy that I've made you happy,” I said.

She smiled and kissed my cheek, holding my hand over the table. I smiled at her, trying my hardest not to think about Frank. This is what's best for everyone. Frank gets to be with his fianceé, Jamia doesn't get hurt, and I don't have to be sneaking around anymore. I can be with someone who is more open and more open about her feelings for me and someone who I can be with in public.

The bell above the door rang and I looked up. I shrunk into myself when I saw Frank walk in. He glanced over at me, then at mine and Eliza's interlocked hands. Frank looked hurt as he turned away, walking up and talking to the owner. I frowned and Eliza looked at me in confusion.

“Maybe we can continue this date at my house,” I said.

Her eyes lit up as she nodded. We got out of the booth and Eliza dropped some money onto the table to pay. She held my hand and I saw Frank watching me as I left. I heard footsteps chasing after me and I turned to look at Frank. His eyes were watery as he looked at me.

“C-can we talk?” He asked.

I looked at Eliza, who had her arms crossed as she stood in front of me.

“You aren't good for him,” she said. “You don't deserve him.”

“I-I know I don't,” Frank said. “Let's just talk, please, only a minute.”

“I'll meet you in the car, Eliza,” I said.

She looked at me with raised eyebrows, turning to give Frank a dirty look. Eliza sighed, kissing my cheek before walking to the car and getting in. Frank looked pained as he looked between us.

“You're on a date?” Frank asked.

“You're getting married,” I countered.

“But I've been planning this wedding for 6 months,” he said. “Things only for us ended yesterday.”

“You don't want to be with me,” I said. “It's easier to get over you quickly.”

“I never said I didn't want to be with you,” Frank denied. “I want to be with you so badly, I love you.”

I felt my face soften as I looked at him. “Oh daddy, I love you too.”

Frank smiled, but then looked upset again.

“Does this mean we can be together?” I asked hopefully.

“I…I love Jamia too,” Frank whispered.

I took a step back and looked at him. “Then why would you even bother coming here and telling me you love me, Frank? That just makes it harder for me. I'm trying not to think about you and just move on because you want to marry Jamia, okay? I'm trying to forget about you so you can have the happy life you have always f*****g dreamed about but you telling me you love me is making this more painful. It isn't fair, Frank, you cannot have us both. It hurts me every time we have to just sneak around behind Jamia's back. Why would you just come up here and tell me you love me?”

Frank opened and closed his mouth, not seeming to be able to find his words.

“Frank, I said what we have is over,” I repeated. “You can't just show up like this, it makes it all so much harder and more painful for me.”

I turned to walk away but Frank's voice stopped me.

“Gee, wait,” Frank stopped.

I turned to look at him, a slight hope in me that he'd still choose me.

“I'm sorry,” he whispered.

I shook my head, trying to fight back tears. I turned away and got into my car with Eliza.

“Is everything alright?” She asked.

I nodded my head and drove to my house. The house was empty as we went down to my bedroom.

“Awe, Gee, you're so adorable,” Eliza commented as she looked at one of the stuffed animals on my dresser.

I walked over and pressed my lips against hers. She seemed surprised but didn't deny it. I deepened it between us as we both moved to the bed with me on top of her.

I needed to forget about him.

“Gee, you sure?” Eliza asked.

I nodded quickly and I saw her smirk. She flipped us over and straddled my hips, her hands on my chest.

“Gonna listen to what I say?” Eliza asked and I gulped as I nodded. “Good boy.”

She leaned down to suck on my neck while I whimpered.

If Frank can love Jamia, maybe I can learn to love Eliza too.