Finding Love Again

Chapter 17

The next week was a blur. I was able to take the week off because I needed to meet with lawyers and plan my victim impact statement. I felt bad, because I knew I was pushing Cody away and not letting him help me at all with this. I felt like it was my battle and I had to fight alone. I guess it’s one of my biggest flaws, being too damn independent. He looked hurt when I pushed him away, but I think he understood. He just wanted to look after me. The only time I let him hold me was when I was waking up during the nights either in a panic or in tears as memories flooded back, memories I had blocked out a long time ago. The week was hard. 

It was now Friday and the day of the hearing. I was driving in and meeting my mum outside the courthouse, where Matthews family would also be. God bless Cody, I woke up that morning to a coffee brought to me, that he went and picked up and brought back to me before he went to work. I gave him a big hug and quick kiss before he left again. Getting up I jumped in the shower, getting myself ready. I was wearing black pants that stopped above the ankle, a pale blue blouse, black court shoes and a black suit jacket. It was my professional look that I didn’t wear often, but I had saved it for when I was applying for corporate jobs. I tied my hair back in a low ponytail and put a small amount of make up on. Ok, physically I was ready. 

Arriving near the courthouse I parked the car, taking 3 deep breaths I got out. I could see my mum waiting already. I knew she would be there early just so I didn’t have to be alone at all. 

“Hey mum” I said, giving her a big hug. Over her shoulder I could see Liz and Chantelle, they were standing with other members of Matthews family including his dad, Peter. “Brave face mum, I can do this.” 

“Yes you can sweetie.” She kissed me on the cheek, taking my hand as we walked over. Everyone was rather somber but they were happy to see me. Except for Chantelle of course, she just sent me dirty looks. 

“Hi Sophia, how are you doing? I hear you have found yourself a nice boy?” Peter approached me, giving me a warm hug hello. 

“Hi Peter, yes. I am with someone”

“You didn’t bring him today?”

“No. I didn’t think it would be right. Not just for him, but for all of you. He wanted to come and support me, but I didn’t want it to look like I was rubbing my new partner in everyone’s face.”

“Oh Sophia, you deserve to be happy. Matthew can’t come back, but he would want you to be happy. Don’t listen to anything my daughter says to you.” 

“Thank you Peter” I smiled, his words were so genuine and he really made me feel much better. Like perfect timing, the lawyer came outside calling us all to come inside. The mood of everyone changed, mum stuck by my side like glue. I zoned out for much of what was going on. Until they brought out the driver of the car, if I admit, he did look remorseful. I’m sure he was sorry for what he did. However he took a life and he didn’t deserve to have his sentence reduced. The lawyer turned to me, “you ready hon?” I nodded, unable to say much, feeling like my voice was caught in my throat. I was called to the stand and asked to give my statement. The only person that I could look at was my mum. Before talking, I again glanced at the driver, taking a big gulp and then back to mum. She gave me a supportive smile. I began.

“The night that this man chose to get in his car and drive after having what he would have known was too many drinks, my life changed. I was waiting for a Matthew to return home, like he did everyday. Instead I had a knock at the door from the police. Unless you have experienced that, you can never imagine. This man took my world away from me. We were engaged to be married, I had invitations ready to send out, all of that ended because of this mans actions. This is why he can’t have his sentence reduced, his actions have consequences and he stole a life that night. No amount of remorse can take that away, you do a crime you deserve to be punished for it. The rest of us, we have a life sentence handed to us, with Matthew gone.” 

I took a big breath, I had gotten through it. It was only short, but the lawyer said that was all that was needed. I could see Liz had tears streaming down her face. This time wasn’t easy for any of us. 

Peter got up and gave his statement, Chantelle have one and so did Liz. The driver pleaded that he was incredibly sorry for his actions and that he is seeking treatment for his alcoholism. For me it wasn’t enough, only 18 months in prison wasn’t enough. 

The judge agreed. His sentence stood as it was, he lost his appeal. The judge said there needs to be punishment for crime and while it was great that he was trying to better himself, we are all defined by our choices and when they impact other people, there needs to be punishment. It was such a relief. He also wasn’t allowed to appeal again, but he may be eligible for earlier parole if he kept up his treatment and good behaviour. It was over. When we were out of courthouse I said farewell to Matthews family, Peter asking me to not be a stranger. Liz gave me a big hug, thanking me for being there and Chantelle, naturally ignored me. 

“Come on sweetie, let’s get some cake and coffee.” Mum took me, linking her arm in mine and we headed to the cafe next door. Selecting a triple chocolate cheesecake and ordering a coffee, we sat down. 

“You did well honey, how do you feel?”

“Honestly, I feel like a weight has been lifted. Today felt like some closure. I need to speak to Cody though, I’ve pushed him away a bit this week.”

“I’m sure he understands. He is a great guy and it’s obvious he loves you very much.” A

Mum and I chatted away. We talked about her work, my work, what I wanted to do next with my career, where I see Cody and I going. By then end of our chat, I was feeling like myself again. I called Cody in the car on my way home to tell him how the hearing went,  I was on my way home, that I loved him and couldn’t wait to see him. This day was the closing of one chapter of my life.