She must have gone back to the house very late because around 3am I heard her crashing and banging around, I silently slipped on my robe and rounded the landing when I saw Mom carrying what looked like big clear plastic bags. Now normally her paranoia would seem normal but even this seemed odd to me.
Pressing my back against the wall so she doesn’t see me, I watch on as she goes back down the hall to get the next thing, what looks to be a tool box, the contents are rattling around yet she carries it with ease. This time on her return up the hallway she heads out the door, evidently she needs something from the car.
so I round the stairs and head down trying to keep quiet and discreet,it looks like she’s putting it all down in the basement the door is unlatched and a small orange glow lights the passage way.
It’s like a horror film really, it always starts and ends in a basement, “What the hell are you doing?” She shrieks making me jump and fall into the door knob, clutching my soon to be bruised arm I look up into her face. I mean what was I doing? I don’t know, I came down I guess to see her,to help? But I knew this wouldn’t wash, “I just needed some water Mom,and I saw the door was left open a little” I try to sound as sincere as possible. “ oh darling,just be careful you gave me a fright, there could be rats down there and you know what that will mean! Disease” of bloody course she’s worried about an imaginary rat and it’s disease.
Funny thing is I know there’s no rats, Mom is so clean and tidy the last house had a cellar down many steps I was told the same,then when I asked if I could take a look it was always ‘ no and danger’ Maybe she thought I’d fall in the dark or get hurt?
I just need her to see I’m older now 16 I can make choices.
Love is strange especially as a child, do love for love? Or because we’re told to?