Remembering Lily

Lilies by the Bridge

“Adie, let’s go. Our parents will know we ditched the party.”

I heard the laughter of the woman. It did not take me a lot of time to know who it was. One look and I already know it is Addison. Compared to the picture Adam has shown me, I am seeing a younger version. She has shorter hair and a face with a youthful glow. In contrast to the younger Adam’s fearful expression, Adie was more laidback and not even slightly scared.

“Oh, c’mon. Stop being so scared, Adam. Did you see how preoccupied are at the party? It’s not like they’re gonna know.” Her blush pink satin dress swayed as she walked further. Her back facing us, both me and Adam. I felt like I was with them but both people did not acknowledge my presence, not even face in my direction. I was invading someone’s privacy and memory but I continued to follow the two. Anyway, I had no idea why I am here so I also don’t know how to leave here.

I was hoping I could get some clarification and answers. If not, this could still help me know more about Adie without disturbing Adam.

“But-”

“As long as you’re not going to tell them.”

“But-”

She stopped from her tracks and looked back. Both I and Adam stopped in synchrony. “One more but and I’m really going to kick your butt away from me. I would still go so you either follow me or go back. Just keep your mouth shut for both options, okay? So what?”

"I won't leave you here alone!"

She smiled at him and I thought I was looking at the mirror that showed my younger self. So, this is what Adam was talking about. That was the smile that he was referring to.

This time, Adam stopped talking and silently followed Adie. We both did. There was something about her. Maybe it’s a positive energy surrounding her that I could feel. It makes me want to know where they were going at this time of the night. Actually, I have no idea what time it was but it was already dark. This place was also unfamiliar but it looked like we were in a garden of a resort because everything around us was well-maintained such as the plants and the lights.

It's not a scary place. In fact, it looks fancy. It's just that there's not a single soul aside from us.

I wonder why no one else is around. It’s such a huge place but it is so quiet.

Adie seems to know the way around here. Could it be that this is where she lives? Until I saw a bridge under a pond in a near-distant. . She knows where we were going although I have no idea where that could be. There was a gazebo at the end of the bridge.

“Here we are,” Adie murmured. “Beautiful isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Adam answered, his eyes looking around and exploring the area.

I was even about to answer myself, struck with the beauty of this place.

"Daddy let me plan this one. Either he loves me too much or he doesn't care about this place anymore."

There were lilies with buds closed as it was the night time floating on the river. There were lights by the bridge. Adie started to walk there and we followed.

“Adie, they’re probably looking for you.”

“As they should. I’d feel bad if they are not. But it’s my birthday, Adam. Can I at least get to do something I enjoy?” Her voice was gloomy and I was not able to see her expression since she wasn’t looking back.

Adam sighs. “Adie, they love you.”

“I know… but I wished they love me enough to care.” She stood in the middle of the bridge. Her hand rested on the wooden bridge while looking at the waters. “I let them throw me a party because I want to see them try together… for the last time.”

“What do you mean?” Adam asked.

I was intrigued as well. What are they talking about?

“They are divorcing.”

“What?” He was surprised and even with my limited knowledge about the situation, I was surprised too but not as surprised as Adam.

She looked so happy earlier and carefree. I was even jealous of the smile she had and the fun I thought she was having. It was quick of me to judge. I realized my mistake immediately because now, I can see her being vulnerable. Her walls slightly diminishing now that she is trying to open up and tell Adam this.

“I knew it would happen. I think we all do. They were fighting all the time, Adam. I know they are tired… I’m so f*****g tired. But I still try to smile because I was hoping that if they would see me happy, they would try… but they didn’t. I don’t matter.”

“Don’t say that.”

“I wish I could just leave… far away.”

There was silence. I tried to see what Adie was looking at the waters. There were fishes, some big koi fish with different colors and of different sizes but what caught my attention more was my reflection. It was my reflection. I no longer had anyone else’s face.

I thought I would get overwhelmed but instead, I was calm. I was comforted by my own face at this unfamiliar place.

“Lily! Lily! Lily!”

I felt someone tapping me but the tapping was really hard against my skin that I decided to open my eyes.

“Dear Lord, thank God!”

I was confused to see Adam as I opened my eyes. Why is he here with me? I mean… he was with me a while ago but that was just some sort of memory I don’t even know if it is real but it feels real. Adison’s emotion.

My head was clouded with both confusion and tiredness. It's like waking up after a short hour of sleep. Like the sleep I had was not enough and I was interrupted. Now I feel dizzy and groggy.

I looked at Adam... or the vision I was having of him. If I am imagining things, why would I see him? Twice, if I would just add.

"Adam..." I touched his face and my hand felt cold and pale against his skin.

I finally realized that I wasn’t dreaming now, the first question that came into my mind was why are there waters dripping on our faces? I suddenly felt cold only to notice that my clothes are drenched in water and so is Adam’s.

“Why… why are- where are we? What happened?” I wasn’t sure what question to ask first.

His arms were still wrapped around me, I just noticed. I was resting, half-lying on Adam like a helpless person. This feels unreal. What is happening? I am so confused. One moment, I was in a dream and now… am I still dreaming?

“You were floating on the river.” He started to cry so hard and I felt bad immediately even when I can’t remember anything from what he said. How did I even come here in the first place?

"How..." I was what? Floating on the river? I can't even remember coming here. I was in my place then... I forgot what happened but I remember clearly that memory of him and Adie. All the details including the words I have heard. One thing is for sure, I don't remember coming here. Even more, floating in the river.

"Why would you do that?" He asked me and I wish I had the answer myself.

I touched my forehead as I tried to remember anything... just anything. But got nothing.

“Lily, I thought you were dead. No… no one’s dying. Not again.”