His Human Mate

Monday

Monday comes around all too quickly and as much as I would love to stay in my pyjama cocoon, eating marshmallows and drinking hot chocolate as I have been doing all weekend. I can't continue ignoring all my responsibilities. Emily tried to convince me to call in sick to work, offering to take the day off with me. I am sorely tempted, but I know it will be harder in the long run if I don’t head back to reality. Something is also telling me that it's a good idea to go in today, like an invisible pull.

Unsurprisingly, I haven’t been able to face going back home yet, so I have no clothes for work. Luckily for me, Emily is pretty much the same size as me. Unluckily for me, she is far more confident and so most of her clothes are far too revealing for me to go to work in. I pick up one of the skin-tight tops she has laid out for me with a plunging neckline and roll my eyes. I can’t wear this; my cleavage would be far too imposing. It's a university so the students are adults, but there is still a dress code and although it does not explicitly say "don't have your boobs out", I believe it would be frowned upon. I stand holding the garment contemplating what to do when my mind drifts to Max. It isn't the first time I have thought of him this weekend. He does stray into my thoughts quite often. I have been trying to keep pushing him out of my mind. The last thing I need right now is him, adding to my confusion.

But this morning it felt ok to be thinking about him, I was going to see him today anyway. He did say I should wear something tight. I briefly consider it, wondering what his reaction would be.

No! I mentally shake myself. He was just having a bit of a flirt and I am in the middle of my marriage falling apart. Be sensible Vee. I quickly pop the top on with a pair of stretchy, black leggings and head down the hallway to knock on Ben’s door.

“Oh hey”, he opens the door wearing nothing but a pair of low-hanging pyjama bottoms. My mouth goes dry as I run my eyes across his impressive physique and land on his sexy trail of hair leading to beneath the bottoms. My mind wanders as I remember what that line leads to. What am I doing? I catch myself, biting my lip and dragging my eyes back to his face, blushing furiously as I see his smirk, knowing that he knows full well what was just going through my mind. I have tried my best to avoid him as well this weekend. Still embarrassed by our momentary lapse.

“Um hey, I err, just wanted to see if I can borrow a shirt?” I splutter. For goodness sake, I mentally scold myself. I’m so bloody horny at the moment, I'm like a b***h in heat. What is wrong with me?

“You mean you aren’t wearing that to work?” He raises an eyebrow cheekily before turning around to grab a shirt from his wardrobe.

“Ha, no definitely not”, I look down at my breasts hardly contained in the thin material of Emily’s top. No, I won’t be wearing this to work or anywhere else, for that matter.

“Here you go,” he hands a light blue shirt to me and I take it gratefully, thanking him and turning to walk away.

“You know you don’t have to be so formal with me, Vee. We’ve seen other naked,” he winks. My cheeks light up again and I quickly return to my bedroom, wishing I had time for a cold shower to calm myself down. Unfortunately, I don’t so I splash my face with cold water instead, thinking that this will have to do. I slip the shirt on and do up the buttons. I decide that it needs a belt around my middle to give me some shape. I quickly apply my foundation, mascara and lip gloss, braid my long blond hair so it hangs down my left shoulder, and then I make my way downstairs to grab some coffee before going in to work.

I arrive at work at 8:15 and head straight to my room. My first lecture isn’t until 10am so I have some time to do some marking as I didn’t do any over the weekend. Coffee first, though, I think and pop to the staff room to grab my second cup of coffee for the day before I settle in to mark some papers. Usually I can make it until lunch without the second caffeine boost, but as I mentally note to myself, it is going to take a lot of caffeine to sustain me this week. I am stirring my coffee in the corner of the unimpressive beige room, looking out one of the big panel windows at the courtyard below, when the staff room door opens and closes. I don’t pay it much attention, continuing to stir my coffee absentmindedly, my attention being caught by some of the wildlife in the courtyard. They put out bird seed for the birds, but this always attracts squirrels. I enjoy the distraction, allowing myself to focus on the scene and not think about the shambles of my life. Suddenly, my body starts tingling and I feel a warm presence close to me.

“Morning mate”, his voice alone makes my stomach do butterflies and I jump slightly. This is new. Max’s presence has always made me excited in a way that no other man has done before, but not to this intensity. My mind unexpectedly travels back to the dream I had Saturday morning and the tiny electrical sparks of pleasure…

This is crazy, he literally just called me "mate", a synonym for "friend". I need to stop this.

“You ok?” His voice again drags me out of my spiral.

“Um yeh,” I mutter, trying to plaster on a fake smile and ask him how his weekend was. He isn’t fooled.

“What’s wrong?” I debate telling him the truth. I mean we work together and he spends a lot of time watching my lectures but how close are we really? Does he want to know about my personal life?

“Hey,” he puts his hand on my shoulder, sending butterflies swirling through my insides and he lowers his face gently closer to mine as he looks into my eyes. It’s as though he senses my hesitation because he says, “you can tell me”. As usual I feel my body heat up under his eyes, but I know without any doubt that I can trust him.

“So on Friday…” I sit down on one of the beige padded chairs and he follows to sit opposite me as I begin. All of a sudden it all comes pouring out and I don’t stop until I’ve told him everything. Even down to how I’m worrying that this is my fault. He listens and I notice him clenching his fists as he takes in what I am saying, almost like he is angry. I am surprised by this. I can understand Emily being upset but I wasn’t expecting Max to take it so personally.

“And now I am not sure what to do. I mean of course we aren’t going to stay together. I can’t forgive him for this but my whole life is about to change and I guess I am scared”. I pause, worried that I have said too much and bored him, as he doesn’t instantly say something.

His face tenses slightly and for a moment I think I see his usually deep brown eyes turn a shade of honey gold, but he closes his eyes and when he opens them it is gone. I must have imagined it.

Fixated on this thought, staring into his eyes, it takes me a moment to notice that he’s smiling. Smiling! I’ve just told him that my marriage is falling apart and he is smiling at me - a big toothy grin that shows his perfectly straight white teeth. I can’t help but smile back despite my reservations at the appropriateness of his reaction.

“I’m sorry”, he says. But he is still grinning from ear to ear so I don't really believe him. What is this?

He places a comforting hand on my leg gently. This small gesture sends a shock wave up my leg straight to my core and instantly creates a pool in my underwear. I cross my legs in an attempt to squeeze my thighs together and he has to remove his hand. He pulls it back and inhales deeply. His expression suddenly turns serious and for a second I think I see another flash of gold in his eyes. He abruptly stands up and walks to the other side of the room rubbing his forehead with one hand and shoving his other hand into the pocket of his navy chinos.

“You don’t look very sorry”, I say, addressing the fact that he was smiling and trying to continue our conversation with a small chuckle, pretending that the atmosphere hasn’t rapidly intensified.

“Yeh, you noticed, huh?” He said with his own chuckle rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude”. After a few minutes he slowly starts to head back in my direction and takes a seat opposite me again. His jaw is tight and I think I see tension in his body that wasn’t there before. He is careful not to touch me again and I wonder if somehow I have made him uncomfortable. s**t, did he notice my body’s reaction to him? I look down at my hands resting on my crossed legs and start scratching my nail beds. This is a bad habit that I have always had. It gets worse when I am uneasy or anxious.

“I am sorry that he hurt you”, he finally breaks the silence and I look up to see him regarding me with a genuinely sympathetic look on his handsome face. I feel my cheeks start to warm up as we sit looking at each other for a moment. Before I can get too heated again, I offer him a small smile and thank him then shrug, putting my walls back up. I need to be more careful around him. We are work colleagues and I don’t want to make things weird.

“Anyway, I have a load of marking to do, I guess I’ll see you later”, I say as I stand up and pick up my forgotten, now luke warm coffee.

I turn to head out the door but before I reach the handle he speaks. “Can I just ask?” I twirl back around to look at him and see a conflicted look on his face now, like he is fighting an internal struggle.

“Yeh”, I prompt.

“Whose shirt are you wearing?” His question confuses me, how does he know it isn’t my shirt for one thing?

“It’s my friend’s brothers. I’m staying with her for now and she didn’t have anything appropriate for work”. I decide not to tell him about our s****l history, feeling that it would probably be heading back into the danger zone of crossing boundaries between professional and personal again.

“Ah”, he seems to visibly relax. I believe our conversation to be over so I smile and head back to the door, making my way out and back to my classroom.