Our Contract Marriage

Loosing myself!

The light was pouring from the window curtain shining brightly on my face when i groaned to getup. I was so excited to see him again. We were going for a visit to the religious places at Bali and i was extremely excited to spend more time with Ryan. Taking more time than usual to get ready i wore a light floral skirt with white off-shoulder lacy top and let my naturally curly hair down.

I saw Ryan & Sheena sitting and having breakfast. "Why are you so late, quickly eat so that we can go out" Sheena commanded. I kept looking at Ryan for a glance, a smile but nothing happened infact he kept ignoring me. We left from our villa and visited the most famous Tanha Lot template and during the entire time Ryan kept Sheena close and wouldn't even look at me. I was extremely pissed by the end of our visit with him, how can he become so cold & distant with me!

After visiting Tanah lot we were back at a cafe nearby our villa. Sheena was bored and dint want to go back to villa yet.

The lounge had low seats around a table. When I entered Ryan sat on the main chair & Sheena quickly sat next to him. I was just going to sit next to Sheena when Ryan pulled my hand and made me sit on the other side of him.

I glared at him and he reluctantly let go off my hand. The waiter came to take our drinks and Sheena was quick to play the newly married couple with Ryan. Ryan just ignored her and started ordering, " Two beers for us and coconut water for my wife". "Actually he meant his wife there Sheena will have a beer and i his travel companion here will have a long Island tea please extra strong" I interrupted. " I dint take you for someone who can handle her alcohol and i hate to be with drunk women" Ryan said. "Tha'ts a great thing then cause you dont have to be me anyways" i told him with a smirk.

I think I saw a small smile but he always is so serious its difficult to say after the withdrawn & cold vibes he has been giving me. I loved beaches the sound of the ocean, its salty smell and relaxing music playing at the shack was really relaxing. On my first drink i was moving in place and by the third one i was up on my feet and dancing slowly moving to the beats of song Fire for you. Looking around i could see a lot of people were on their feet enjoying the song. 

Sheena had passed out or she was dead not sure and dont care. I was just enjoying the next song when someone held my waist from back and started swaying to the music. Each beat of the was making me extremely aware of body of this person. I could feel him against my butt probing and got lost in the wind of lust. I knew from the cologne of his body that it was Ryan standing behind me and kissing my neck, biting my ear. "I want to f*****g remove this excuse for a top and f**k you right now on the table till neither of us can stand straight" with this he softly bit my ear making my pulse race.

I turned around to him and lightly grazed my lips on him to challenge him "Who's stopping you?" Without wasting time he took my hand and started walking. I had no idea where we were going until we reached the dark parking lot. He opened the car and pushed me inside the back seat. " I need to f**k you right now, we can make love when we're back home" he said and started to remove his jeans.

I wanted to tell him this was my first time but everything was happening so fast and i was extremely dazed and wanted to enjoy the moment for once. He kissed me roughly almost biting and bruising my lips while he tore my panties swiftly from the skirt and started rubbing me there. 

It was the first time a guy had touched me and i was so turned on that i mini orgasm-ed only post few gentle stroke of his fingers. " You are so f*****g wet for me and so response baby" his voice was hoarse and moment frantic. Pushing me down completely on the seat and he leaned over. He rubbed himself on my wet p***y twice before entering me without any warning. I wont lie the pain was excruciating, so there were tears in my eyes but the actual horror dawned on me only when i looked up. 

Ryan froze and removed himself quickly from me, making me flinch. He looked down and saw the blood showcasing the proof of my virginity on my skirt and himself. He quickly got some tissue and started cleaning me and covering back and then he cleaned himself and tucked back himself back in pants. " I am just going to ask you only once? How the f**k did you not think of telling me that your a virgin", Ryan yelled at me. " I...I uh I never got the time and now you never asked me" I was stammering and feeling guilty. It was so confusing that I was guilty for losing my own virginity to someone whose clearly was so repelled and angry.

Ryan quickly pulled me to sit up right and left me in the car without saying anything else. After few minutes he came back with a sleeping Sheena in his arms. He tried to make sheena sit up right but in the entire trip she slept in his arms. He dint make any eye contact with me. This constant cold & hot emotions from him was making me emotionally exhausted. Once we reached back in the villa Ryan took sheena back to their room with even a backward glance. 

I was bone tired from these high and lows of our relationship. I was soaking myself in bath tub trying to dull the ache between my legs when i heard him outside the bathroom, "I have some cranberry juice kept for you outside with Advil. It will help with the pain" . 

I was so angry with myself for feeling the connection which apparently did not exist. I hate him and I hated myself for giving the best thing of my life to such a person. When i did not acknowledge him for sometime Ryan just left the room closing the door.

I washed up and changed myself feeling much more fresh from the bath, i picked up the cranberry juice bottle lined up with Advil and threw them outside my door. The last thing i need from Ryan was pity after the way he behaved.