Amidst love and heartbreak

Aron's feelings

Aron’s POV

Breathe. Aron, you have to breathe. There should be no bad reaction because you will lose her completely. She just said that she is going out with Ethan. I guess there is no real news there. I guess, deep down I knew that this was going to happen. The way those two have been hanging around lately and the way she was laughing that day I first saw them together. Who knows how long this has been going on? And stupid me never noticed anything. Stupid me was being respectful and waiting for her time to be right. Anger is starting to boil inside of me.

“Aron, are you ok?” she asked while still being in her fairyland. 

“Am I ok? Yes, Emily. I am fine,” I answered while trying to calm myself down.

“Any thoughts?” she asked while biting her bottom lip. That distracted me for a couple of seconds but then I pulled myself together in order to answer her.

“I have some thoughts, but I don’t think you are ready to listen to them,” I said half muttering.

“Tell me. I want to know. You are my only friend. I value your opinion more than anyone else’s,”

She seemed worried. I didn’t want to make her feel bad but I don’t trust the guy. I have a feeling that he is going to play her and dump her.

“Look, Emily. I really care about you. I will say this once and I hope you try to take it into consideration. The guy is a fucker, a womanizer, a Casanova, call it whatever you want…”

“No, he’s not. At least not only that,” she defended him.

“f**k… you are defending him already,”

“What are you talking about?” she asked.

“No answer this: How long has this thing been going on?”

“What thing?”

“This thing between you two,”

“We were friends, and he asked me out,”

“We are friends, Emily. Not that pathetic excuse of a boy,” I was starting to get angry again.

“What does that have to do with it? Why are you saying these things now?”

 I could see tears welling up in her eyes. It’s not the effect I wanted to have on her, but now there is no going back.

“I have been waiting to get out of this friend-zone for almost four years because you were too busy to have a life. Meanwhile, I never got a life as well,” I said too much. I know I said too much. She will hate me now. Or at least, she will avoid me forever.

“But…” she started saying.

“I better go, before I say more than I am supposed to say,” I am just tired of this.

I left Emily in her room, wearing that dress that will make him check her shapes out. I just gave him a free pass to my prohibited wish.

As soon as I greet her mum and walk out of her driveway, I take a deep breath to calm myself down. My hands are shaking. Tears welled a couple of times in my eyes, already. She doesn’t understand what’s going on with me. I bet she doesn’t even know why I lashed out on her.

I keep walking for a couple of houses until I reach my parent’s house. I still live with them. I am a total disappointment of a person. I contemplated getting in and heading straight to my room and hide there for I don’t know how much time, but then I changed my mind and hoped on my car that is parked right in front of the house. I drove away without a destination in mind but I am not surprised to find myself parking right in front of Brandon’s house. I normally call or text him before coming over but today I didn’t really think about it. 

I knock on the door a couple of times and after some attempts, Brandon opens the door. He is wearing a polo shirt and some jeans. This is not his usual professional outfit. That means he is probably going out pretty soon.

"Hey, Bran," I said with a low voice not to give away immediately that I am upset.

"Hey, Lil bro. What's going on? Come in," he offered and I entered the house following him to the living room. I plopped on the couch and laid my head on the backrest. Closing my eyes, I took a deep in and out.

"I need a drink. Can you pour me one?" 

"You came there to drink? This place is not a bar, buddy," he said most probably to cheer me up but when he saw me frowning he stopped.

“I. Need. A. Drink. Please?” the polite side in me showing in the end. Brandon nodded and took a serious expression while pouring me a drink. I hope it’s a strong one.

“Here you go. Now tell me. What’s going on?” he asked with the same serious expression on his face. I bet he never saw me like this before. I don’t ever remember myself like this before. Like everyone, I had my ups and downs but this down never happened to me.

“Thanks. Sorry for coming over like this. I probably should have called. I hope I did not interrupt anything,” I asked suddenly realizing that he probably had plans.

“Don’t worry. Tell me what happened,”

“She is going on a date,” I said with half a voice. “She is finally free to live her life and she… has a date… with the one and only person I dislike in this world,”

“I see. How do you feel?” What a stupid question? How do you think I am feeling? I give him a look to express just that.

“Like the loser that I am,” I said and I really meant it. I feel like the world that I have lived in just collapsed today and I am still falling. How far down? I still don't know.

He opens his mouth trying to say something and closes it again. Opened it again and still no words came out. Suddenly the doorbell rang and he stood up to go open it, but before that, he turned to me one more time.

“You, are not a loser,”

Nolan’s POV

I finally gathered the courage to ask Brandon out on an official date. He wanted to come to get me in his fancy-ass car, but as per ritual I am the one asking and I should be the one picking him up from home. I park my Honda in front of his house and stay in for a couple of minutes more. My eyes catch his brand new red BMW in his driveway and can’t help feeling bad. I feel like a total loser compared to him. How is this ever going to work? We are so different in everything we do and are.

I gathered some courage and stepped out of the car. This is our official first date so better not keep him waiting for me. I ring his doorbell twice before he comes to open it.

As soon as the door opened my heart skipped a beat. He is gorgeous. Calling him handsome wouldn’t do him honour. He is just much, much more. 

“I brought you chocolate. I don’t know if I should have bought you a flower or something else…”

“It’s ok,” he said with a smile and I think I blushed which he mirrored in a second. My, my. The mighty Doctor blushing. If all the girls that throw themselves at him knew that he plays for the other team.

“Should we go?” 

“Actually… can we wait a minute. My brother is here and he is not in a good place right now,” he said it, whispering. The disappointment was probably very clear on my face now. I think he noticed because next thing I felt strong arms pulling me from the front. He hid his face on the crook on my neck and whispered softly.

“I promise to make it up to you as soon as possible,” I know he would but I wanted to make him feel good today. It was my idea and my moment to show him my feelings. I decided to say as much.

“But I wanted to make this day special for you. You make nice things for me all the time and it was my idea to go on a date, so if we have to reschedule I will do this all over again, ok?”

He smiled back at me with his soft eyes filled with so much care. 

“As you wish,” he said and kissed my cheek sweetly. We had already kissed before but it was more like a stolen kiss rather than a kiss we shared spontaneously together. “Come. I will introduce you to my brother,”

“Brandon, I need you to refill this, if you are going to abandon me longer,” Aron yelled from the living room.

“Aron, this is Nolan. Nolan, this is my brother Aron,” he said and I did notice that he left out the details of our relation to each other. Not to be blamed. We are still undefined. I would have done the same. But I felt like I would have wanted him to introduce me as something more, his boyfriend maybe.

“Oh, hi Nolan. Excuse my pathetic appearance and my probably very soon drunken self. I am heartbroken and I can’t help it,” Aron said and I felt a bit bad for him.

“Hello, Aron. It is my pleasure to meet you even though not in perfect circumstances, but don’t worry. We’ve all been there,” I said and saw Brandon looking at me with worried eyes. We haven’t shared our past together yet and I am not sure if I will share anything at the moment.

“Drink?” Brandon asked me and I nodded. I trust him to find a suitable drink for me since it is obvious that we are stuck here tonight.

“Are you guys friends?” Aron suddenly asked. Brandon looked at me and I was doing the same. I didn’t know if his brother knew about his s****l orientation or not, so I waited.

“Aron, we used to be friends. Now…” he started but his brother interrupted him with realization.

“Was this a date? Oh, my God! I am so sorry.” he said and stood up to leave.

“No, Aron. It’s ok. We are not going anywhere, and you definitely are not in a good place to leave anytime soon,” I said.

“How ironic can life be? I was not able to stop a date that I should have, but I am stopping you guys from going wherever you were planning to go. How pathetic, right?”

“No, it’s not pathetic. Things happen. Plans change. Plus I might get something extra on our next date just because your brother feels guilty for missing this one,” I said and winked at Brandon who was now faking to be appalled. He definitely knew I was joking to make his brother feel better, even though he made some promises as well.

“Nolan…” Brandon started but got interrupted by his brother.

“He better be making you feel special and treating you right. You are entitled to everything you want just for putting up with him,” Aron joked and we both laughed at Brandon’s expense. 

When I came here today, I was nervous about the date I had planned and about my doubts about this relationship in general. I never thought I would be meeting someone of his family, who by the way is more than comfortable with us eventually being a couple. But most of all, I would have never thought that I would have been accepted so easily by one of his family members. I always thought that Brandon came from a wealthy family and that we had nothing in common together, but being here today made me think that we are all human beings, with our ups and downs.

Brandon seems like he had enough of us two laughing at him and joking together. He stood up and poured another drink for himself.

“Get me another,” called Aron suddenly getting back to his sad mood. 

Oh, man. This feels like a very long night of drinking and heart to heart talks.