ON HOLD Perfect Suffering: The Eternal Lovers Vol. 1

280 Nights of Celebration

The act of dance,

Is an act of love to the body.

No soul feels as free,

As when the mind no longer cares for stillness.

Dance your soul to the heavens,

And shall the gods welcoming you graciously.

—

“Everybody! Dance your hearts free!” Wine sloppily spilled onto the floor as Darius drunkenly cheered. “My love, you gotten drunk before our dance.” I giggled holding his arm. “Don’t worry I can still move.” He bounced his knees almost toppling over. I helped him back into his chair and he let out an earthy burp. “Maybe I have overstepped myself tonight. This ‘is’ the 7th party we’ve had. You can’t expect me to be sober ‘till the end of them all.” He slumped towards me with a glaze over his eyes and a smile. He stressed how important a Queen’s final dance was in order to end the night. That worried me. A lot. “Bring us some Withania and Poppy!” I shouted to the maids, because I knew what was coming up and wanted to sober him up as fast as possible. “No. No. Don’t let my drunkenness ruin your moment. Arthur!” He shouted and my soul screamed in anguish. I lowered my head as he approached us. “Give Elizabeth a dance for me. I don’t want this night to go without her satisfaction.” He took his hand with sincerity. Arthur glance me over to me and I turned my head. “Don’t mind her.” He added taking my hand as well. This was one of the few moments to where Darius would give me a stern look or a firm grasp. That was the true ‘king’ coming out and I never dared make the ‘king’ angry. I got up taking my ruby red gown in one and Arthur’s arm my other. “What’s your poison?” He leaned in grinning. I rolled my eyes as we separated, standing center of everyone. “Brahms!” I shouted and I held up 1 finger signaling the specific symphony. I looked over to Darius who was already dozing off. The upbeat winds blared as we circled each other, locking eyes. Arthur lifted his elbow as he bent his knee. This was the classic ‘courting of the bird’ move. I stuck my heel out raising my hands above my head. The infamous, ‘pretentious crow’. We continued circling until the circle grew smaller. I then took his waist in mine as he did the same. We leap on the 4th and 11th notes of each line. I took a lot of skill to achieve such precision. “We use to practice this dance in the Barn. Don’t you remember?” He whispered with a glued expression as to not draw attention to his words. “If I didn’t, you’d be stumbling to Vivaldi right now.” I tried not to laugh at his concentration. He swung me around as we began the ‘lovers prance’ running to each of the four corners of the room. “Don’t you see?” He held me from behind. “Us dancing for all the kingdom to watch. Our dream is becoming reality.” Desperation started pouring out of him as it always does. “I know no reality with you that isn’t full of pain and suffering.” I hissed back as we seemingly looked joyful to everyone else. “I will not give up on you Elizabeth.” He still held me causing us to stumble and miss a step. I broke the dance yanking my arms away. “Enough!” I was now speaking for everyone to hear. The strings and winds faded, and I shamefully cleared my throat. I walked back to the stage sitting next to an drunk and unconscious Darius. Two soldiers came in order to help him up as our exit and then end of the ball was announced.

—

ARTHUR POV.

“Dammit!” I kicked a mud filled bucket as I paced outside of the royal chambers. ‘Why does she still hate me so?’ I cursed myself. I tried my best to behave with her, but can’t bring myself to commit to my duties when around her. Why am I so mad? I ran my fingers through my sweat filled hair and I felt like my skull was splitting.

“Sir?” A voice called out and I swung around assuming a proper stance. I looked to see it was Elvira and I lowered my guard. “As you are.” I bowed getting ready to walk away. “Why does our queen treat you so horribly?” She asked stopping me in my tracks. “How do you mean?” I turned back to her acting clueless. She looked down wiping her tattered gown as if it would remove the stains. “It’s just. They way she speaks of you, talks to you. The way she answers to you. You’re one of the most respected and noble men I know besides our King. Why can’t she see that?” She bit her lip approaching me closer. I didn’t know what to say, even though I knew the reason. “Sorry, I’ve spoken out of turn.” She looked almost as if she were going to weep and I stopped her. “No, you haven’t. How the queen sees me shouldn’t be of concern to you. Our duties should be our only motive. I can’t control her emotions.” I held her as I explained things deeply. Her eyes scattered across my face, and before I could let go her lips stabbed into mind. I quickly turned my head almost causing her to fall over. “I’m gravely sorry! That was out of line.” She blurted turning away from me. I wiped my mouth looking around instinctively to see if Elizabeth or anyone was watching. Thank god she wasn’t. She looked back to me in away to try and garter pity from me. “El.” I only hyphenated her name when she made a mistake. “Elizabeth sees you like a little sister. She gives you so much privilege.” I force my tone serious so she wouldn’t misread me. “Don’t make mess of such a good thing. Good night.” I stormed off still feeling her lips on mine. Was that the right thing to do? Why can Elizabeth have another, but I must turn down the second most beautiful woman in the land?

—

THE NEXT NIGHT.

ELIZABETH POV.

“Uh uhn, that’s enough wine.” I took Darius’ chalice as we partied on the 8th night. Majority of the commoners could barely move as their drunkenness remained during the day and into the current night. “They’ll dance themselves to death.” I chuckled but was slightly concern. “Well then they’ll die with their bellies full and hearts whole!” He shouted which temporarily brought life back into them as they cheered. Is this all there is to being queen? For the first month I was on a strict routine of dining, f*****g, and bathing. And now, Darius has masked the soon welcoming of our ‘son’ with 280 days of nonstop song and celebration. I hated that I could no longer consume wine as it was the only thing tiding me over until my weekly feed. Thankfully, my early cutting off of his wine and brandy intake insured our dance for the night. I got up taking his hands pulling him out of his chair. “VIVALDI!” I happily shouted met with a few slight groans as this was the 4th time his music was played. I signaled for a more somber tone to try and shake things up. I gently placed my head down on his chest as we began our intimate waltz.

“What shall we name him? Or her?” His embrace was always gentle as we swayed to the slow strings. “I don’t want to think about it. It’s still so early.” I was dismissive and I knew it annoyed him slightly. He sighed continuing the conversation, “My father was King James. Yet, now there’s so many James’ in our kingdom now it no longer has power.” He shot down his first option. “What about your grandfather? Or The king before him?” My head rested on his soft tiger fur collar. “Edward..his name was Edward.” He said with a nonchalant tone, but I couldn’t control the panic attack that was about to ensue. I gasped as if I was stabbed by a knife falling to the floor. “What the matter?! Is it the baby?! Assistance!” He shouted also in a panic. Tears streamed down my face and I was filled with memories of that wretched man.

—

FLASHBACK.

“There won’t be a wedding. You are no queen my love.” Edward threw my white gown to the floor. I looked at him with even more disdain that when I first laid eyes on him. “Than what am I?” I felt a heavy lump in my throat. He bent down to me as I looked to my bruised leg. “My darling. You’re nothing but a w***e to warm my c**k until I find my true queen. Be thankfully I let you sleep at the top of the castle and parade you as if you were pure.” His smile was so crooked and evil. “I also been noticing you mingling around that commoner. What’s his name again, Artimus? Angelo?” He calmly circled me tossing my knife in his hand. “Arthur.” I held my leg carefully knowing it was for sure broken. “Ah yes.. Arthur. Such a shame, he fights like a warrior. He would’ve made a wonderful second hand leader of my men. Shame he’ll be executed at high noon.” He laughed stabbing the knife in the nightstand stand. “You will not lay a finger on him.” I managed to stand on my hood leg, limping towards him. “What will you do to stop me? Stab me? Poison me? Offer my head to the highest bidder?” He showed zero fear or weakness towards me. “You have no power over me. You couldn’t even graze me with a dagger.” I twiddled his index finger around the knife’s hilt. “I’ll find away to end you. Even if it means bringing god and the heavens down to my side for strength.” I tightly held my rosary staring him down. I finally cracked him, he lunged forward snapping the beads off my neck. “Mind your tongue, my little queen.” He hissed and I was thrown to the ground once more. My head slammed to the stone and my vision flashed white. As my ears rang, my head began burning as I realized he was pulling me by the hair.

I was taken to the private chapel as outside onlookers ignored my cries for help. “Let this be a moment for you, my love. Confess your dirty sins and maybe you’ll be forgiven!” He threw me into a small confessional box. “No please! Not again. Don’t leave me over night!” I pleaded and begged, but he stormed away and I was met with silence. He distancing footsteps took the breath out of my body as tears burned my cheeks. I fell pitifully into the corner as I looked up the Mary Magdalene who was also weeping for me. "All I ask is to be freed of this hell. The pain is too much to bear and I no longer wish to walk this torturous earth. I am not ashamed of what I wish for myself and only ask that you have mercy on me and mercy on Arthur. For he doesn’t deserve such retribution." My tears painfully mimicking hers. I then reached into my gown pulling out my second dagger. It glowed from the candle flames and I could see my mournful reflection. I held out my wrist as high as I could and dragged the blade along my swollen veins. Blood began flowing like unstoppable tears and I was already numb from the gin Edward forced me to consume. I then fell to my side and it continued pouring over the wooden floorboards. I closed my eyes accepting my fate.

Moments passed, and I could still fill my faint beating heart. A gust of wind shook me awake and I opened my eyes to see my blood soaked wrist was now healed. I quickly grabbed the dagger again and let the tip pierced my skin only for nothing to come from it. I looked at the blade only to see a small chip off the tip. I then began desperately stabbing at what I could as grief overflowed me even more. My anguished cries rang out and I tried ramming it into my heart hoping to finally do the job. I didn’t even realize I was standing on a now healed leg as I achieved the impossible. I could not die. My voice was now muted and the sound of my beating heart was no where to be heard, but I was still alive. I dropped the dagger in defeat.

—

My heavy eyelids opened as I stared at the ballroom ceiling. “There you are.” Darius let out a sigh of relief. He helped me sit up as he kneeled next to me. “You had a heat spell is all.” Elvira placed a cold cloth on my forehead. “Thank you.” I mustered as they helped me to my feet. My blurry vision slowly cleared as everyone was filing out of the room. I couldn’t help but look to Arthur, who’s chin was violently quivering as he had to stand guard for the commoners. I couldn’t help but feel bad, but also anger that he allowed me to wed the grandson of the man that caused everything. How could he not know? He had to have known.

—

“I will hold off on the parties. I’m sure everyone tired of them at this point.” Darius saddened by my sudden ailments. “I will ensure you’re nursed to be as healthy as the great stallion.” He deeply whispered as he ran his thumb over my forehead. I took his hand pressing it against my lips. I then felt compelled to subliminally inquire them both about King Edward. “I remember.” I spoke up still feeling weak, especially since this was the night of my feed. Darius and Elvira perched their ears. “What do you remember?” He came closer to me knowing I was referring to my past. “I remember stories..of a king who was murdered. A king named Edward.” I told half the truth in order to get answers. Darius let out a pained sigh. “Edward was a tyrant. He birthed my father through a prostitute, who he later murdered for having a son. He never wanted anyone to come after him, not even his rightful heir. Eventually, his corrupt nature is what led to his demise, yet he truly thought he’d live forever. Some still say he deserved it.” He was deep in thought and I could barely look at him without seeing hints of Edward now. “But my father taught me dignity and honor. We lived in a small shed until he was rightfully given the thrown. He didn’t stop until he got what he was owed, and did it with pure elegance.” He now looked proud of his upbringing. “So to answer your question. I don’t think our son should have such a shameful name.” He slightly grinned which warmed me. “Rest now.” He gave me quick kiss before leaving. I looked to Elvira who was washing the same cleaned cloth over and over. “You can go too.” I waved her to leave. She looked hesitant, “I can stay for the night. I don’t want you having another moment.” She looked upset. “Don’t worry about me. I’m sure I’ll be fine.” I held up the watered down brandy which was meant to give me enough ease without harming the ‘baby’. “Please can I stay?” she got up gripping the cloth and I was suspicious. “What’s with you? I gave you an order now leave?” I didn’t want to ponder on what could be causing her behavior as I rolled over hugging my cushion. She exited and within the hour Arthur entered. I sat up as he came to my bedside in nothing but his sleeping garments. “We need to be quick tonight.” He untied his shirt and I grabbed him. “If you ever attempt to lead me into deception again. I will have you banished to the ends of the earth.” I seethed staring him down. He looked puzzled at first, but eventually put two and two together. “You must have forgotten. I killed Edward to save us. Darius is not him and never will become him.” He tried reassuring me, but I twisted my neck as I shook my head vigorously. “All kings’ hearts become poisoned eventually.” I feebly got up nearing the warm fire. “I just haven’t decided if I truly want to allow the same to happen to my lord. Even though our nature must remain hidden.” I looked back him and and he shot up. “Don’t tell me you’ve thought about changing him?!” His voice was full of perceived betrayal. “Don’t be dense.” I scoffed walking back to the bed. He gave me a look that mirrored mine distasteful feelings towards him. A part of me felt foolish and wanted to apologize, but I couldn’t swallow my pride. “Take off your shirt.” I sat down taking his hand. He yanked it away which also hurt me as he removed his shirt. We started our routine as I leaned over taking his wrist in my mouth. As quick I began drinking his blood the quicker I finished. He immediately started getting back dressed and I took his hand once more before he could rush out. “Thank you.” For the first time I thanked him for feeding me while also giving the back of his hand a bloodied kiss. He seemingly relaxed from his apparent tenseness giving a nod in response.

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