The Boy I Shouldn’t Want

“Okay, Mum, babe, wish me luck.” I said it as our car finally stopped in front of the campus, where students were walking in and out of the buildings. We had just been directed there by the admission office, and suddenly, seeing the university in front of me made everything feel real. I was in the car with my mother, who had been driving us all the way here, while my cute boyfriend sat beside me in the back seat of Mum’s white sedan. Bobby. Bob for short. My childhood best friend for over eight years. He had chestnut-brown hair, a handsome face, and sleepy-looking blue eyes that had always held something I couldn’t quite explain. Almost like they carried dreams inside them. That was probably the real reason I hadn’t thought twice about accepting him as my boyfriend back in high school. When he had asked me out, he had done it quietly, almost shyly. And majorly because Mum approved of our relationship, I hadn’t hesitated to say yes. Bob was my safe place. And surely, he was. His hands were wrapped around mine like he didn’t want to lose me ever, like he wasn’t about to let me go. My hands were clasped over his too. Mum glanced at us through the rearview mirror with a smile. She was wearing a beautiful white suit, her brown hair cascading over her shoulders. “Go out there and kill it. Make me proud, sunshine.” She said it warmly, and I smiled. Then I turned to look at Bob. His face held so much warmth as his blue eyes stayed on mine. “Kim, I would call you every day.” “And I would answer every day, Bob.” He smiled and reached up to touch my cheek. I leaned toward him and kissed him once on the lips. It was soft and quick, but enough to make him smile. “It’s time I go so I don’t miss my lectures. I’m seeing already on the timetable that classes start in a little while.” I held up the timetable in my hand, running my eyes over it again. Chemistry started at ten. And it was already 9:30. I had to be in class before then, especially as a new student. “You’re right,” Mum said. She opened the car door and stepped out. Bob and I followed. The sun was shining down on us now, making everything look golden. My brown hair gleamed underneath the bright morning sun as I stood there, staring at the university in front of me. I knew I had a lot to do now as a university student. I would be living in the hostel, and after classes, I had to find my dorm, settle in, unpack and somehow figure out how everything worked. I prayed it wouldn’t be as stressful as I already imagined it would be. Thankfully, my luggage had already been dropped off at the hostel before Mum drove us here. At least that was one less thing to worry about. “Oh, honey, I’m going to miss you so dearly… and your nuisances.” Mum said sweetly as she came toward me for a hug. I rolled my eyes. “Mum, I have no nuisances. Stop.” I hugged her back. She smiled and pressed my body tightly against hers, almost like she wanted to stick my scent to herself so she’d have something of me to take home with her. For a few seconds, neither of us said anything. Then she finally pulled away. “Just kidding.” She said it, but judging from her expression, I knew she had only added those words so I wouldn’t start arguing with her. Then Bob came toward me. He held my arms, and I immediately melted into his blue eyes. “I love you, Kim. And I can’t wait to see you achieve all your dreams.” I smiled. Then I raised my hand and rubbed his head. “Uhh… your hair is so fluffy.” I scattered the hair he had probably spent several minutes brushing into place. Bob didn’t care. He only smiled at me. He was currently schooling at a college next to his late parents’ workshop, which he was now tending to. He couldn’t school far, even though he really wanted to attend university with me. Just as we had in high school. And then I whispered loudly enough for both of us to hear, looking directly into his eyes. “I love you too, Bob.” Our hands tightened together. After a few more moments, Mum and Bob began escorting me toward the building I was supposed to enter. It was a tall, impressive building with enormous stained-glass windows stretching across its front. The colorful glass caught the morning sunlight, throwing beautiful patterns of blue, gold, red and green across the stone walls. Broad stone stairs led up to the entrance, and students were already making their way inside. From the corners of my eyes, I could see some walking alone with their phones in their hands while others were discussing things with their friends. Then my eyes caught someone. And for a moment, everything else disappeared. He was tall. Muscular. And completely emotionless. His thick black hair was slightly messy, with a few strands falling over his forehead. He wore a white shirt that was partly unbuttoned, exposing his muscular chest. Black leather trousers hugged his long legs, and he wore polished black Chelsea boots that somehow made the entire outfit look even more intimidating. There was something about him. Something I couldn’t explain. He was coming down the stairs in the most careless, arrogant manner, one hand tucked casually into his pocket. Then I saw the tattoo. It was drawn along the side of his neck, dark against his skin and disappearing beneath his shirt. I swallowed. And then his sharp, dark gaze touched my face. It stayed there. Longer than expected. My chest suddenly tightened. Why was he looking at me? And why couldn’t I look away? “Kim?” Bob’s voice interrupted my thoughts. I blinked. He was watching me now. Apparently, he had been speaking to me, asking me a few questions, but I hadn’t been listening at all. I turned my head sharply toward him. I was speechless for a moment. “You… you were saying?” My chest began to throb as he repeated the words I hadn’t heard before. “I can’t wait for us to graduate and build the perfect family together.” I heard him say it. I smiled. Or at least, I faked one. I was very good at fake smiles. Because deep down, the face of the person I’d just seen kept ringing through my mind. Who was he? And how could a person be so hot? I screamed inwardly. Then guilt immediately followed. Bob was standing right beside me. My boyfriend. The boy I’d known for over eight years. The boy who loved me. And I was thinking about another person. Someone I didn’t even know. Someone whose first name I didn’t know. Someone who had somehow sparked an interest in me that no one else had. I felt guilty. I shouldn’t even be thinking about him. I didn’t know him. Yet I couldn’t stop wondering who he was. Finally, Mum and Bob prepared to leave. I gave them both a kiss on the cheeks before watching them walk away. I stood there for a few seconds, watching them disappear. Then my eyes drifted back toward the stairs. The stranger was already gone. But somehow, my feet began moving. I found myself walking along the path the stranger had followed, my head held high as I pretended I was simply going to class. But deep down, I knew exactly what I was doing. I was hoping to catch another glimpse of him. And I had absolutely no idea why.