YOU ARE IT FOR ME

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Donovans P.O.V

I feel very angry right now while staring at Stacey and her boyfriend. What the f**k were they even doing here? why do they have to be here right now and in the same restuarant as I am, if only I knew that I would meet them here I wouldn't have come here with Catherine.

Gush this is so messed up, I thought that I could successfuly avoid her at least till monday but fate made it that we had to see each other today and in this way.

I know I had treated her unfairly and I have no excuse whatsoever in treating her the way I did, but I thought it was better if I saved her from all the s**t going on in my life and I can distract myself by faking my relationship with Catherine. But heaven help me, because seeing her right now with another man did alot of things to me, I feel suffocated and rage was building up inside of me, the like that I have never felt before.

This was excatly the things I had tried to avoid all these years, all these over whelming feelings and attractions one feels when you fall in love.

I thought I have locked up all of my feelings but here I am right now feeling like strangling the man she was with and kissing her senseless till she agrees to be mine totally and nobody else's.

I glared at them as she equally did the same to me. What the f**k was her problem? giving me those dirty looks. I sighed as I responded to what Catherine was saying to me while I continued to watch Stacey, she looked very angry as we both stared angrily at each other, the jealousy was eating me up already.

Suddenly her boyfriend turned and stared in our direction then I saw his eyes widen in recognition, then he quickly looked away saying something to her . It infuriated me the more as she leaned towards him saying something to him.

I totally forgot that I was with catherine as she asked me why I was so distracted she turned and looked towards the direction I was looking at.

Is that one of your fling? she asked chuckling, you look like you are about to kill someone right now. I sighed looking away from them. I didn't say anything to what Catherine just said. I went through my menu seeing nothing as my thoughts were occupied, I heard Catherine telling our waiter the things that she would like to order and then she called my name snapping me out of my thoughts.

What? I asked, she smiled at me before rubbing my hand which was placed on the table, babe the waiter would like to know what you would like to order.

Oh! just get me the speciality for today but before then get us the best wine here. She smiled before leaving to get us our wine.

Is everything alright D? you seam to be lost in thought and you keep staring at that couple over there.

Nothing to worry your head over Cat, lets just enjoy this lunch and please you don't have to act excessively affectionate towards me in public, I replied frowning at her.

She didn't reply then I looked up at her and saw her lower lip trembling like she was about to cry. What the f**k! I say quietly. come on Cat, why do you look like you wanna cry right now? okay I am sorry if my words hurt you it's just that I have suddenly lost my appetite.

She sniffled then looked at me with teary eyes, does it have anything to do with that lady over there? I clenched my fist that was on the table then took a deep breath, let's just say partly but trust me you can have any thing you wanna eat.

But you already placed the order for your own food we can't let it go to waste she replied looking worriedly at me. I chuckled once the waiter comes with our drink I will just tell her to cancel my order.

She sighed, is she very important to you? she asked. I don't know yet, I say looking towards Stacey's table. She looked angry as she was quietly speaking to her boyfriend. It seams like there was trouble in paradise. I watched them , then suddenly Stacey rose from her seat along with the guy, she picked up her hand bag and started to walk towards our direction or rather she was heading towards the restuarant entrance, She locked eyes with me without those glares that she was giving me previously, then she turned away and walked gracefully as she made her way out of the Restuarant. Her boyfriend was walking behind her with anger written all over his face. I know this, because I was also looking at him without expression on my face. He glared at me when he met my eyes as he passed by our table making me wonder what the f**k was his problem.

I can't believe that she didn't even bother to acknowledge me, the least she could do was to say hi to me but then who am I kidding.

Damn, she looked so good in her green dress which hugged her body and brought out all her sweet curves and those legs of hers were to die for, to me she is like the most beautiful creature I have ever behold in my life. If only the situation were different I would have claimed her as mine a long time ago even if she had a boyfriend I won't give a s**t about it, I would have claimed her non the less.

I sighed, rubbing my neck, just then the waiter arrived with our drink and Catherine was kind enough to tell her to cancel my own order seeing that I was in no mood to make any conversation.

After the waiter left, I looked up to see Catherine giving me a quizzical look, I have never seen you act like this before D, that woman must be really important to you for her to foul up your mood this way.

This only means that she is very special to you. I burst into laughter, what are you implying Catherine, you know that for a long time now I don't allow myself to catch feelings for any woman so where are all these coming from.

Believe it or not D, you are catching feelings for this lady right now. My laughter froze after hearing what she just said to me. Lets just forget this Cat and talk about something else.

She is very beautiful she continued. Who? I asked raising my brow.

Duh..the lady that just left with her boyfriend who else. I said nothing only concentrated in pouring drinks for myself while she drank water.

We didn't say anything after that as I was in deep thoughts regarding my next decision. I know Stacey is feeling betrayed right now, what asshole would refuse to call a woman he had spent a passionate moment with, well that asshole was me. I had treated Stacey the same way I treated the other women but did she deserve this kind of treatment from me? neither did those other women.

Well she is different from them. They are all after my wealth well as for her I can't really place our relationship. We only fooled around once and that's it but before then I was already feeling attracted towards her which I have not felt for any woman all these years so I can say that I deserved every treatment she metted out to me.I have to fix this I say under my breathe.

What did you say? Catherine asked me, You have been out of it D. I smiled Don't worry Cat everything will be fine I just have to do something to fix my mess.

Mind to share? she asked making me laugh Nope I say popping the p. Hmmm.... she said rolling her eyes. the waiter brought in her food and as she started to eat I resolved that I would settle things with Stacey on monday, I can't wait.

**************

Stacey P.O.V

I feel like s**t right now for how I spoke to Ryan knowing fully well that it was not his fault that my boss was an asshole. Ryan has been nothing but good to me and he did not derserve the treatment I gave to him at the restuarant. I didn't know that seeeing Donovan with another woman would make me feel so bad to the extent of reacting this way towards my best friend, who had done nothing but made my day very memorable.

I sighed for the umpteenth time as I slowly turned to glance at him. He had this expression on his face that I don't understand, he also looked angry as I noticed his jaws clenching from time to time.

He has been very silent all this while since we left the restuarant and as he drove he didn't ask me anything nor did he say any other thing to me since the time I threathened to leave the restuarant with or without him. he had stared at me then nodded telling me we can leave, since then he had remained so quiet and that worried me alot.

I didn't know where to start from or what to tell him that made me behave like that to him, I know Ryan whenever he was very furious he didn't say anything and right now I know that he was beyond mad at me. I bit my lips silently while staring at him. I felt so remorseful, this was the first time I have ever treated him like this, we do argue at times as friends but never have I ever treated him so poorly in public before. It was really bad of me, if reverse was the case I would have been very devastated right now.

I couldn't find the right words to use in apologizing to him right now, I was also so nervous and mad at myself, gush, I feel like beating myself up right now. I bowed my head not looking at him as I tried to form in my mind the right words to use to tender my apologies to him.

Half an hour later we arrived at my place and Ryan parked the car but non of us made any move to get out of the car and the car engine was still running. I was twistting my fingers that was resting on my laps as I tried to form the right words to use but Ryan beat me to it, Why Stacey? I looked at him trying to understand what he meant by 'Why', he noticed my silence so he repeated his question, Why did you behave like that towards me at the restuarant?.

I shook my head as I willed myself not to cry , I am sorry Ry I didn't know what came over me, please forgive me.

No Stacey you can do better than this you know, tell me why you had to ruin today for us because you saw your boss. Tell me are you two together already?

No! I almost shouted, we are not together. Then why did you act like that?, your mood suddenly changed when you saw him at that restuarant, you were absolutely fine before he arrived so what happend?.

I sighed, Ryan's incessant questions will make me blurt out the truth, I wasn't ready to tell him anything just yet until I am sure about where I stand in Donovan's life. But wasn't it f*****g obvious that the man has zero feelings for me. So how can I possibly tell my best friend that I am attracted to someone who has no feelings for me. The last thing I want is to see that look of pity for me in his eyes.

For the first time in my life I am inlove with a man and not just any other man but my boss, a man who changes women like he does his underwears.

What was I even thinking, that someone like Donovan would actually return my feelings? the man has no f*****g heart to begin with. It was my bad luck that my heart had to fall for such a man but then the heart loves who it loves we only just do what our heart wills us to do but I cannot continue like this I will have to find a way to kill every feelings I have for this man and I will not put the relationship between me and Ryan in jeopardy all because of him.

 I don't want to end up humiliating myself before my best friend and I don't want him to think of me as a stupid woman who had to fall for a man who didn't want her in the first place. Those people who said that love is sweet and a beautiful thing must be seriously under the influence of a cheap alcohol, my own love story has not even begun but already I am feeling pains. How can love be this painful, I have never fallen inlove before in my entire life and when I did, it was with a jerk, a f*****g casanova with no feelings. I have really f****d up truly.

Answer me Stacey, Cat caught your tongue I heard Ryan say angrily bringing me out of my thoughts. I sighed I am sorry Ry for treating you the way I did, I had no right to make you feel this way but believe me I will tell you everything when I am ready I replied not looking at him.

He laughed bitterly making me look up at him, when he stopped laughing he raised my chin as he looked into my face, why can't you tell me now huh... you always tell your best friend everything , so why not just f*****g say something to me right now. I stared at him with shock, Ryan had never swore at me like this before, he must be really mad or was it something else why is he acting this way, he is so furious right now that I can't even look at him.

I gently removed his hand from my chin. Let's talk when you are calm, for now I just wanna be by myself I Said getting ready to step out of the car.

Is that what you are f*****g saying right now? he said, I looked at him and then nodded, You are upset right now and I am not in the right frame of mind to give you all the answers to your questions, so let's wait when we are calm then we will talk. Ryan stared at me intently and I stared back at him and after some seconds when he saw how serious I was he backed off saying nothing, he nodded then opened the door before stepping out of the car.

I breathed a sigh of relief before also stepping out of the car. He locked the car then handed the key over to me. Are you coming inside for a while? I asked, forgetting that I requested to be left alone for a while. I just didn't like that he was upset with me. I will have to find a way to make it up to him.

Ryan shook his head, Nah I am heading off right now. What about your stuffs we got won't you take them along I asked.

I will get them when next I come visiting he said. I wrapped my arms around myself then nodded.

I am sorry Ryan I say again, he didn't respond but looked silently at me. I wondered what was going through his mind right now.

I will see you later Stacey stay safe he said, I nodded giving him a small smile which he returned, then placing both hands in his trouser pockets he walked away leaving me with my thoughts. I unlocked my car then got out the stuffs we bought today, I struggled with them a bit to take them inside. When I got inside my house I dropped everything on the living room couch then made my way to the kitchen to get a drink of water.

Ryan must be feeling very bad right now. I didn't even provide any answer to justify my actions today, Hmmm... I am such a bad friend I just pray that he will forgive me for my actions. I can't lose our years of friendship just because of I can't control my emotions when it comes to Donovan. I will set things right between us but I can only do that when I start thinking straight.

***********************

Donovan P.O.V

As I prepared for work this morning I had only one thing in mind, the very thing that had been bugging me all through the weekend and that is to fix my misunderstandings with Stacey, its about time I stopped running away and give my heart a chance even if it kills me, I can't continue like this, how long will I keep suppressing my feelings for Stacey, I know I have sworn to never give my heart to any woman but there was just something about her that makes my heart beat so fast but not in a bad way but it makes me all warm inside, I will take things very slow with her and get to know her more better before committing myself fully to her.

I sighed, but one thing is going to be an obstacle to all my plans and that is her boyfriend, I can't just steal her away from him. Anyways we are going to start off as friends thats it, I will have to remove the bad blood between us and we will become friends, its better than having her hate me.

An hour later I was on my way to the office, Lyon had taken a leave for a week and I decided to just drive myself rather than hiring a temporal driver to do that for me.

I parked in my usual underground garage and got out, I entered my private elevator and punched in the number to my floor, on getting to the right floor the elevator dinged and the doors opened while I adjusted my tie and stepped out.

Good morning sir, Sarah my secretary greeted me smiling widely at me, she looked lovely this morning but not as lovely as Stacey used to look every day. I replied with a nod as I made my way to my office. I checked the time and it was almost 8.am, I sat down and made myself comfortable. Some minutes later there was a knock on my door and my face lit up as I expected the person to be Stacay but when I asked the person to come in, to my dissapointment it was Sarah with a steaming cup of coffee in her hands.

My face fell as I went back to my stoic expression, I grabbed some documents lying on my table to go through them while Sarah carefully placed my coffee on the table. Thanks Sarah I say without looking up at her as I engrossed myself with what I was reading. You are welcome sir, she replied.

Has miss Stacey arrived? I asked still not looking in her direction. I haven't seen her this morning sir she replied making me look up at her. Stacey has always been a very punctual person why then is she not in the office by this time it was already past eight.

I dialled her office line and it rang without her picking up. Then I dialled her phone number and it went straight to voice mail. What the heck I swore under my breathe.

I made a hand gesture for Sarah to leave, as she left I stared into space. What could possibly be the reason for her absence to the office and why didn't she call to say that she would not be coming to work today. The last time I saw her she looked furious, could it be that she is sick or something.

I sighed and rubbed my temple, I felt a headache setting in. She might turn up at the office let me just give her some more time, and with that I went back to what I was doing but I couldn't concentrate as my mind was filled with thoughts of her and where she was right now. I sighed again and tried to work, but after some hours I couldn't take it anymore, I brought out my phone and put a call across to her but it went to voice mail again. s**t, if she had arrived to work she would have come into my office already but there was no trace of her and this only points to one thing, that she did not come to work today. I stood up then grabbed my car key and left the office.

*****************************

Stacey P.O.V

I was not feeling myself when I woke up this morning, I must have woken up at the wrong side of bed. I felt so unhappy and unethusiatic to prepare for work. f**k it, I don't even feel like doing anything today except to eat sleep and lazy around. I don't wanna see the face of that douche bag even. He can go to blazes for all I care.

After my morning routine, I took a quick shower then wore a white short and a pink sleevelees top before I went to fix breakfast for myself.

Ryan have not called me neither did I call him. The only call I made was to my parents telling them that I would not be able to come see them because something came up, fortunately my parents understood and I rescheduled to see them another day. I have been in this foul mood since saturday, the day I went shopping with Ryan, nothing seamed to make me happy and the person who would have cured me of this bad mood was upset with me.

I missed him so much but calling him is not enough I will have to try and see him today and divulge everything to him, I don't care any more what he would think about me after I tell him everything, but I can't lose my best friend.

I walked into the living room and turned on my music player, playing 'Let me down slowly' a song by Alec Benjamin. I put it on repeat and tuned the volume down so it can play softly in the background without being too loud.

The music lyrics depicts my mood right now. I made my way into the kitchen and set about making my breakfast or should I say brunch. it was just a simple meal of toasted bread and hot chocolate, I didn't feel like having coffee, I needed something sweet to sweeten my mood this morning.

I know that I am being unprofessional by not calling the office and letting them know that I would be absent from work today but I want Donovan to have a taste of his own medicine and he should feel how I had felt when he didn't call to say he would be going on a trip and won't be at the office. I don't even wanna think about him right now, I will only end up slipping into depression again.

I washed up the used dishes, after drying them I went back to my room to brush my teeth again, grabbing my phone I didn't bother to check it and however made my way to the living room, I turned off the music so I can find something to watch on netflix. As I was flicking through netflix to search for the movie I would like to watch, I heard the sound of my door bell , I furrowed my brows in confusion. Who could be visiting me by this time of the day, Monday for that matter. what if I had gone to the office.

I reluctanlty got up from the couch and went to the door as the door bell rang again. I frowned and pulled the door open ready to give that person a piece of my mind but I froze when I saw who was at my door.

What in God name was he doing here, how did he even find me. I got over my shock and then glared at him as he stared at me with that expressionless face of his.

Aint you going to let me in? he asked with that sexy voice of his. I rolled my eyes and shifted aside for him to get inside. Nice place he said looking around, How can you afford to live so luxuriously and drive around expensive cars with what you earn. I scoffed, for your information I had all these things even before working in your company and besides did you come here to talk about my house and cars? what are you even doing here at this time of the day? I asked folding my arms over my chest glaring at him.

He chuckled, could you stop glaring at me kitten, it doesn't suit you, he sat down while crossing his long sexy legs. As usual he looked like a god in his suit and he was still wearing that silver hair of his. The guy is just perfect and seeing him now made me unable to control my feelings but I will not allow myself to be swayed by him anymore.

I sighed, can I get you something to drink? I asked. Even though I was mad at him, he is still my boss. He shook his head, then looked intently at me as his eyes took in my appearance and I saw as his eyes lingered on my long legs and bare feet. then he gulped and bit his lips slightly before returning his gaze to my face. I was standing in front of him with my arms folded while I waited for him to state the reason for his visit.

Why were you not at work today? he asked very softly after ogling me.

I didn't feel like it I say. He chuckled, you didn't feel like it, he repeated, you didn't even bother to notify the office of your absence ,your actions were very unprofessional. I looked at him before laughing bitterly, oh really! so I am being unprofessional now, what about you? did you even bother to call me all through last week?, you only sent a message to me after I called you, so were your actions professional too?.

It's this a revenge or what?, I am still your boss and the last time I checked you work for me miss Stacey so cut your s**t out he said uncrossing his legs, he looked angry now.

But I was bent on pissing him off, sorry mr boss I didn't know that bosses are exempted from the rule of professionalism, and the rules are applied to only the employees of your company, pardon me if I forgot to notify you of my absence today I replied sarcastically.

I was getting furious right now as I yelled those words at him. I expected him to give me a snide reply but he remained silent and pinched the bridge of his nose, I know that he was controlling his temper.

I am not here to fight with you Stacey, I got worried when you didn't show up and I couldn't reach you on the phone hence I came here to find you.

Oh really how did you feel sir? I made emphasis on the sir, he stared at me, what do you mean by that, I meant to say how did you feel worrying about someone who you could not reach on the phone, wondering why you cannot reach them or why they have refused to call you?

I felt tears prickle my eyes as I felt frustrated at his indifference, he should also feel the way I am feeling. Why should I be the only person feeling terrible right now. Donovan stood up from his seat and made his way towards me, he sighed then placed his hands on my face cupping it. Talk to me Stacey what is the matter? he asked with concern in his voice.

I blinked away my tears then removed his hand from my face, nothing is the matter, don't worry I will be at the office tomorrow , you can leave now I responded turning away from him.

I know I f****d up, but I had alot that I needed to do hence I didn't call you, I scoffed then wiped at my tears that was dripping already, I gave a bitter laugh, the last time I saw you, you didn't look like someone who had something to take care of because you looked pretty relaxed for someone who had things to do, I remarked facing him again.

I needed to stay away from you he said quietly under his breathe but I heard him. Why did you need to stay away from me? I asked, he didn't say anything, tell me, I yelled at him, Why do you keep avoiding me even after we spent time together that day, did it mean so little to you I said with tears running down my face, Donovan stared wide eyes at me as he reached out to me, I evaded his touch as I waited for his response. Say something you prick I screamed.

I like you Stacey, he replied quietly.