Magic Shop

14| HOME HAD A DEEPER MEANING THAT HE THOUGHT

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Roen literally wanted the ground to swallow him whole without leaving any traces. If there was a gun beside him, it would be a better choice to pull the trigger for how embarrassed he was. Roen initially wanted to deny everything however, since Dawn already caught him in the act, throwing him some embarrassing comments the only reaction he can do was wipe the eyeliners on his face harshly and slowly burn from embarrassment and shame. Furthermore, he was praying to the gods not to let Dawn tell this to his friends. If he does, please smite him with lightning! Roen’s heart deeply prayed as if he was a pious believer.

After a moment, Dawn’s laughter died down only leaving him some flushed red cheeks, red eyes, and an aching stomach because he laughed so hard he felt like someone was tickling him.

Composing himself, Dawn later on walked to the sofa and casually sat there. His eyes were clearly mocking his friends and there were still a tint of mischievousness and mockery on his eyes. Roen did not open his mouth instead he ignored his friend and flopped on his bed trying to forget the horrible scene he just went through.

“You’re not going to tell them that are you?” Roen’s voice was pleading. Roen’s actions, thoughts and voice was so new to Dawn he can’t help but stared and reminisced the time he had taken for granted everything thinking he knew his friends that much however, witnessing this, left him speechless as he blamed himself for being clueless.

Sensing that Dawn wasn’t answering, Roen shifted his gaze to the left where the couch was. Dawn was casually sitting there. One of Dawn’s foot was even bouncing up and down but his eyes felt like he was looking unto the future.

Roen found it weird because this was not the usual Dawn he knew. Dawn was someone who always mind his business and his world. He often hangout with them but he never open up with them. He was also reserved. Roen did not find that odd thinking that guys like them do not casually open up with their problems thinking it was not masculine enough.

 However, as Roen observed Dawn’s actions from crying and laughing inside the classroom, asking for sleep over and now he was in daze, Roen felt that the Dawn in front of him was really different from before. He even entertained Ayase’s ridiculous theory of Dawn being cursed because of what happened to them last week.

With all of these thoughts in his mind, he initially forgot his embarrassing moment. He shifted his whole body to the left and face Dawn whose eyes were still distant and said, “Do you have any problem?”

Stunned for nearly two seconds, Dawn’s lips curled up trying to bury his previous act of being in daze and nodded on Roen’s question. “I’m perfectly fine after laughing so hard because of your eyeliners.” He teased once again and Roen just scoffed.

“You won’t tell them that right?” Roen asked the question once again. Dawn brows went up and down while he said, “What’s in for me if I kept it a secret? I’m even looking forward to Ayase and Keil’s reaction even our youngest Aiden, hmmm?” There was a hint of laughter on his voice as he blackmail his friends.

“Okay, what do you want in return?”

“Let me think.” Dawn said as he was occupied by his thoughts once again. He clearly does not want to return home. He hated the face of his father’s b***h and even hated his previous room for he knew he will remember the things he did in the past. From slicing his wrist to even trying to take several sleeping pills trying to end his life as he felt the burden of time and expectations of the people around him. He can’t bare to see pitiful eyes and there was a time he tried to even drown himself on his bathtub. However, all of his suicidal attempts failed numerous times.

If Dawn will return, he knew memories would haunt him again. That room witnessed all his breakdown, how his demons ate him alive and how sick he was.

But, if he won’t return home, he won’t receive any allowance at all and tuition fees. He needed to study to be closer with his friends. If this was the future, he was sure that his mom would take care of him.

Wait!

When that thought passed on his mind, Dawn was rendered speechless once again. He felt like a light bulb was lit up giving him an idea. He was really conflicted about his future with his mother but now, he knew that he can walk towards that future. All he need to do was find his mother here in this time line and live with her.

However, after having that bright idea, he suddenly fell into a dilemma. The problem was he doesn’t know where his mother lived. If I remember it clearly, mom said he often visit me in my school right? Maybe there’s a chance of me meeting him this time. Betting everything to his luck, Dawn’s mouth opened

“Give me place to stay.”

Roen was confused. He doesn’t really know the reason why Dawn was asking a place to stay when he has a house. “Why? I thought you loved your room and your father?” Dawn wanted to scoffed at Roen’s words however he tried his best to held it all in for he knew what he was in the past. In the past, he looked up his father with admiration for he was raising him well even though he was just a single parent.

“My father would bring his girlfriend home today.” He said in an indifferent voice trying to sound that it did not matter to him when in fact something inside him has stirred but he just ignored it.

Roen’s reaction was indescribable as his eyes and mouth widen. His finger tips brushed his hair that was blocking his eyes and said, “What? I thought he said he won’t marry anymore?”

“As if, he will bring home his b***h this day.”

“b***h?” Roen repeated what he had said. It seemed like he was even more surprised on the chosen vocabulary of Dawn. Dawn knew the reason why. He was polite and respectful when he was young.

“Did you actually call her b***h?”

“Are you deaf?” He said, amused. If Roen was seeing different sides of Dawn it was the same for Dawn who was seeing a new side of Roen. This friend of them who was always in his word and who talk less was actually someone who was intrude with his friends life, love emo songs and even eyeliners. Dawn wanted to laughed again as he remembered the face of Roen earlier.

“Just shocked.” Roen grimaced. “I feel like you changed. You were not like this yesterday. Are you really not cursed?”

“Since when did you believe in those kinds of cult things!?”

“I’m not believing I’m just considering that fact because talking to oyur right now feel like you’ve aged completely!”  

Dawn laughed self-depreciating. If he wasn’t considering any effects on the future, Dawn might have already told him that he was from the future. He scoffed once again.

In his mind, his past suddenly flashed like an power point presentation. It was uncomfortable for Dawn.  “I felt that too. But it’s inevitable especially if your world is shitty.”

“Shitty?” Roen repeated his words again. Dawn tsk-ed.

“Stop repeating my words and just answer my question.”

Roen think for a minute. He subconsciously reached a pillow that was lying in his bed and buried his face before motioning his head up and looked at Dawn again.

“If you’re just going to stay for how many days here, after that where will you stay?”

“I’m going to find my mother.” Roen’s eyes landed on Dawn. Roen felt like Dawn prepared many surprises for him today.

“You have a clue to your mother?”

“Yes, I know her face and I also know that she comes to see me in our school from time to time to check upon me but she never dared to introduce herself. This time, I’m willing to reached her hand in order to not regret anything.”

Roen and Dawn stared at each other for a while, while silence enveloped them. Later on, Roen withdraw his gaze and nodded as if he was thinking of other things. “I feel like you staying here would be a good outcome for Sejin.”

“Why?” Dawn can’t help but asked.

“Just like you said earlier, life is shitty and there are things and matter that pull us down. Even though Sejin acts like he was such a person with all sun shines and warmth, this house is slowly killing him.”

“Why?” He asked again.

Roen paused for three second as if he was contemplating if he should answer Dawn’s question or respect his brother’s secret and privacy. In the end, he opened his mouth. “House is different from a home. This is just a house not a home for us.”

Dawn nodded as he let go of the matter. After experiencing many things on his past life, he knew the meaning behind Roen’s words and Sejin’s predicaments.

“How about you then?”

Roen smirked. It was a little refreshing in the eyes. “I ignored those kinds of things so nah.”

“Ignoring doesn’t mean it won’t hurt.”

“Whatever!” Dawn was about to retort his friend’s words when Roen waved his hands dismissing the matter and at the same time Sejin walked inside. Roen and Dawn looked at the door. Sejin was there. He was carrying a tray with all kinds of snacks they enjoyed but that was not what had caught Dawn’s attention.

It was for the fact that Sejin was wearing a bunny apron. At that moment, Dawn laughed out loud again as he struggled to say, “You two siblings are both weird!”