Crazy is Perfect

Katelin's Chapter, Chapter 5

I looked through all of the rooms except one, his room. I went over to his house as a kid and tried to go into his room but he would always stop me before I could get inside. This time I have no choice but to go in.

This is the day I've been waiting for since the first time I came here. Today is the day I get to see what's behind his bedroom door.

"What are you waiting for? Open the freaking door." Sarah say impatiently. What am I waiting for? I just need to turn the handle. I can't do it for some reason. This just doesn't feel right.

He told us to never go into this room and we don't want to know what he is hiding. It would just ruin our relationship.

I turn around to Sarah and point at her.

What the heck are we doing? Why don't we just open the door?

No we can't!

Yes we can

"I can't do it! Just leave me alone and let me let Sarah open the door!" I fall to the floor screaming which I thought was only in head but then I felt a hand on my shoulder. Sarah looks at me with fear and worry in her eyes. I only saw that look once before.

That was the day you fell in love with him.

I stood up and she gave me a hug. Somehow that makes me feel better. After a while, I pulled away and opened the door. I can still hear the voices in my head fighting against me as step inside.

I have had schizophrenia since I was born. They will debate inside my head and try to pull me in two different ways. I will always try to ignore them but I can't honestly do it all the time. I can never get away from them and they will never leave. I will choose to deal with them even if I can't have my own life.

The difference between me and other people with voices. I am the only who could tone them out at least for a small period of time. They wanted to know how I can do this but the secret is...

I was born insane. I am declared the highest amount of crazy I am pretty much both Harley Quinn and Joker's crazy times twenty. This makes me more aware and secretive than anyone else. I always know how to get away with anything. I can do whatever I want and I love it. I would look to tell Sarah this but we just met.

So anyway, back to the present.

I opened his bedroom door and started looking around. I couldn't find anything out of the usual in the main part of his room. I was about to leave when I realized I forgot to check his closest.

Idiot, why in the world would you forget to check the closest. That is where people would hide things and maybe we'll find out some dark secret of his.

Wait, why would he hide things from us? He been our best friend for over ten years.

It's because he doesn't trust us. We are crazier than crazy. He would never want to be on our bad side. We freaking kill people and don't even think twice about it.

That's because you told us to start killing. I am still against it. There is no reason to hurt others. You don't see that love is stronger than power.

That because there is no proof of love being strong. It just rips us into tiny freaking pieces and we end up even more messed up then before. We went through love before and know it is weak. Do I have to show you again?

Do you want me to open the freaking stupid door or not?

Do it!

Show him that he has nothing to worry about.

Show her that we can't trust him!

Just do it!

Open the door to his closest.

I grabbed the handle and pulled the door open. I wish she was right and I didn't find anything that J would hide from me. He was right, I did find his secrets in his closest. I can understand why he would keep me away from this room. He always hated the idea of me going to his parents house ever since they-

"Kate, you ok? We need to keep looking around." Sarah grabs my arms and I take another glance around the room.

Surrounding the whole closest was pictures of me and they were millions of them everywhere. Lucky for me his clothes was neatly put away. There was nothing on the floor, thankfully.

I don't want to be walked on. "Sarah, get over here."

I turned around and she looked like she was about to pass out. I grabbed a note by the dresser. I tore it open and sat down to read it.

When I finished I thought it was just the letter from J but then I saw another small piece of paper fall out of the envelope. I quickly picked it up and when I saw what it said I ran out.

What the hell? Does he know who he's messing with? What is that picture of him for anyways?

I think It's a trap. He is not a good person, remember. He must of done something horrible to Jace already.

I try my best to ignore them and keep running towards the car but a question still pops into my head. What if Jace is in danger?