A Tear Drop

Chapter 04

Clarissa's POV

I woke to the sound of the alarm, it was five in the morning. 

“Urgh! I can’t believe that I am still getting up at five in the morning to run all alone.” Muttering under my breath, I got up, absent mindedly wore my running shorts and top, and my shoes. I knew that it was pointless to wake up Michelle, she never wakes up early in the morning for anything. Plugging my i-pod, I stepped outside into the autumn morning. I don’t jog for the looks but I jog because routine exercise disciplined the mind and the body. The air is chilly, but I can feel and taste the winter in the wind. And I being the odd one as usual is looking forward for winter.

I decided to end my run after an hour, even for a person like me, I find too much time outside is not good for my health. And I was not surprised to see Michelle still fast asleep, her butt all out. 

“This girl.. God bless her future.” Shaking my head I headed towards the kitchen to prepare some breakfast.

“YA!” slapping Michelle's butt I shook her: hard. “Wake up i***t. It’s already 6.15.”

Michelle groaned and pulled her sheets over her head to block me out. But I knew that too well. Taking hold of the two corners of the sheet I tugged it hard bringing her to the floor.

“YAAAA!!!!” She screamed. “b***h! WHAT THE f**k!”

Grinning at her, “get up you i***t, it’s already 6.20”

“I hate you! You know that right? I f*****g hate you!” she whined.

“Nah,” I wiggled my finger at her, “you love me f*****g too much.” Pulling my tongue out at her I walked to my room to get dress.

By 7.45 we reached our office and walked straight into Gabby’s office.

“GABBY!” Michelle shrieked in excitement and ran to hug her. "We missed you.”

Gabby is the Editor in Chief of ELLE Magazine. Though she is old enough to be our mother, she acts just like a young girl and we love her to the moon and back.

“I missed you too girls.” She said hugging us. “Urgh! How much I missed you.” She said hugging me tightly.

“So, how was Japan?” Michelle asked.

“Urgh, don’t even ask,” she said frighteningly. “I didn’t understand s**t what they were talking and that’s why I asked you to go.” she said while accusingly eyeing me.

“Gabby, you know for a fact that the meeting was for you and besides, if I go instead of you they would have been disappointed and felt belittled.”

“Ok, ok” she said raising her hands in surrender. “Anyways I brought you two something.”

She handed us two heavy bags, “when I saw them in the shop it reminded me of you girls, so I bought them. I bought some gifts for the rest of the staff as well. Don’t worry.” She added quickly upon seeing my face.

Back in my office, I switched on my laptop and saw that my brother was online on Skype. I quickly hit the video button and within three rings he answered.

“Hey little sis,” he greeted with his usual smile but this time I sensed an excitement in his voice and his eyes shown with impatience.

“Ok get it out.”

He looked at me baffled, “how did you know that I had something to tell you?”

I sighed, “just in case  you forgot, you are my brother. I have known you for how long? Almost 27 years.”

Noah chuckled in agreement, “it has been almost 27 years and I never could beat you in an argument.”

“This was not an argument. Just stating a fact.”

“Ok, ok, anyways, I tried calling you yesterday but..”

“Yeah, Michelle told me, I was in a meeting and my phone died afterwards, forgot to charge afterwards.”

“Busy huh?”

“Gabby flew to Japan and she just returned, so I have been a bit busy trying to cover up her work as well.” I smiled at him, “so tell me. What’s the news?”

“Well…..” he dragged. “This is not how I wanted do this, but since you called, I guess I’ll have to break it to you.”

“Noah!? Tell me what’s wrong. You are scaring me.”

Olivia and I got engaged!”

I blinked and let the news slowly hit me. I held my breath and my eyes widen in shock. I know that I was expecting this, but this was so sudden, I gulped and brought my hands to my mouth in shock. And then it hit me.

“WHAT!? OMG!! REALLY!! ARE YOU SERIOUS?? OH MY GOD!!!” I couldn’t believe it.

Olivia is going to be my sister in law! Our dream and our wish is coming true. “OH MY GOD NOAH!!!” I screamed again with excitement.

Suddenly Michelle came crashing into my office with a desk calendar in her hand, ready to throw it, “where is the mouse?”

Seeing her all worked up for the mouse I laughed out loud and ran to her and hugged her and twirled her, “MICHELLE!!!! You have no idea how I am feeling right now. I am so f*****g happy!” I said hugging her tightly.

Removing herself from my bear tight hug, “what the f**k happened Clarry?”

“Noah got engaged to Olivia?” I said giddily.

“OH MY GOD! You must be kidding me!” she turned towards the laptop, “congratulations Noah. I am so happy for you dude. So when is the wedding?”

 “Why don’t you two first sit, I’ll tell you all the details.”

“Oli wants to have the wedding in...”

“April,” I said absent mindedly. It was her dream and her  wish and it was our secret. I looked at Michelle, “Olivia always wanted to be an April bride, she loves the spring.”

“Clarissa” Noah called me back. “I want you to come back.”

And just like that, my heart and mind froze, my smile vanished and my fingers unconsciously balled up. “No... Noah” I stuttered, “What did you say?”

“Listen to me Clarissa,” Noah said, “please come home for your one and only brother's and your best friend’s wedding” he pleaded.

“Dude, what kind of sister do you think I am? Give me the date, I will come.”

“NO!” Noah said in a stern voice that made me jump up with fright. He had never raised his voice at me, only on one specific rare occasion. “I want you home before January. I need you home for Christmas.”

“But..” he is being impossible now. He knows very well, as to why I never returned home for the past 10 years. So why is he doing this to me? Why?

“Clarry,” he said softly, “listen to me, your best friend lived without you for 10 years. She did not have her best friend to share anything, to complain about me or anything and now it’s her wedding, the moment that she wants her best friend the most and you are going to ditch her? For what? Simply for that one reason that you and all of us know had nothing to do with?" 

Noah took a deep breath and leaned forward at the screen, “baby, listen to me, Olivia needs you and your help. She needs you to help her pick her wedding dress, to throw a shower at her and to calm her nerves.”

I know that I was tearing up pretty badly, I know that I am wrong and that I need to be by her side more than anything else, but my heart just doesn’t allow me to do so. I am scared that I would reopen old wounds and hurt many more people around me. I am safe here and all my loved ones over there.

 “Noah," I pleaded, "you, of all people know me better than anyone, so why are you doing this to me?"

“Clarry, I know that you left to never come back, but it’s been 10 years and in those 10 years you have not even come for a visit. Why are you punishing yourself for something that you haven’t done? And don’t you want to be a part of your brother’s happiness?”

Michelle suddenly turned the laptop to her, “Noah, don’t worry, she’ll definitely be there for Christmas. I’ll make sure of it.”

“Thank you Michelle, please talk to her and you have to come with her as well and Gabby and Daniel as well. I’ll invite them personally but they can come with her as well, that way she wouldn’t feel too uncomfortable.”

“Of course Noah. I’ll be there for sure. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Can you please put me on to Clarry again?”

“Of course.”

“Clarissa, I will be looking forward to see you.” He said with longing in his eyes, a longing that made me double over with pain and hurt that I had inflicted on them by leaving them and I know that there is only one way for me to help them overcome it and that is me going back home. 

“And one more thing,” he said breaking my train of thoughts, “don’t tell Oli that you’ll be coming early. Let’s give her a surprise.”

I simply nodded at him unable to grasp where this is headed to.

“I have an operation in…” saying so he examined his wrist watch and I saw that he was wearing the watch that I gifted him on his 18th birthday, an involuntary smile crept in to my face, “10 minutes.”

He caught me staring at the watch and he waved it in front of me, “it is the very watch that you gifted me. It’ll never leave my wrist, as I promised.” He said smiling at me. “I got to go. Catch you later. Bye Clarry. I love you.”

“Love you too”, and the laptop screen blacked out with only my reflection in sight.

“Before you breakdown,” Michelle quickly said grabbing my phone, “call Olivia and congratulate her and then you can breakdown.”

She was right, my voice shouldn’t sound all raspy as if I have cried. Taking a deep breathe, I dialed Oli's number.

Right after the first ring she answered the call as if she was expecting one, “My god, we must have had telepathy, you called me right at the moment I was going to ring you.”

“Congratulations!” I said trying to sound excited as much as possible.

“You know? Already?” she asked in surprise. “I am going to kill that arsehole!” I giggled at that, genuinely. “I am serious, I told him that I want to do it together but that dimwit just did it by himself.”

“Chillax dude, it’s fine. I was the one who called him since I had many missed calls from him.”

“Urgh!! Do you know how hectic it is going to be when the preparations start? Wish you were here dude. You will come to my wedding yeah?” she asked hesitatingly.

“Of course i***t,” I said laughing.

“Will you be here at least before a month?”

“Why?”

“Clarissa!!!!” she whined, “Have you forgotten that you are my maid of honour?”

I laughed out loud at her actions, she hasn’t changed a bit, acting like a small kid. “You haven’t changed one bit. I do remember men. I was just pulling your leg.”

“I really wish you were here men.” she said sadly. “I have so much of stuff to do, but I am really glad that you are coming at least a month ahead. I know that when you come everything will fall into place.” 

I smiled at her and I felt really bad, I mean I have simply being a bad friend, sister and daughter to them. I am such a disappointment.

“Don’t worry Olivia, we’ll be there,” Michelle said quickly before Olivia could see my almost teary face.

Olivia’s face split into a radiant smile, “awesomeness. Anyways I have to go, have a surgery in 10”

“Ok then, see ya,” I said waving at her. “Sleep early and don’t get stressed.”

Olivia giggled and hung up.