Infinite Bonds

Chapter 2

            I slowly trudge up the path that heads to the bus stop. I don’t look at any of the atypical glances on my pack members faces. I just walk the familiar path to the bus and try my best to smoother the voices of loathing that permeate in my head. I know how they all feel even if I could not hear it in their thoughts. There is a thick air of detest that is immersed all around this atmosphere. I try not to breathe it in. I do not want that soaking through my body. I have enough debris to deal with. It makes me feel soiled and it does not wash away. Believe me I have tried many times to wash it away. I turn my music up louder to help calm myself. I clench my fists and I can feel moisture in my hands. I do not know if it is sweat or blood that I feel dripping in my hands.

When I feel my skin begin to stich itself back together and smell the coppery smell of the blood, I confirm that it is in fact blood. Self-inflicted wounds not the first time I have done that or the last I can attest. I take a deep breath and touch the center of my chest where the mark that my “Mystery Boy” and I share resides. I linger there letting the heat and the beat of my heart that I envision is synchronous with His sooth me. When I open my eyes, I duck quickly. I do not even have to turn around to know that Asher the oldest son of Alpha John and Luna May is the one who hurled the book at my head. I can feel his venomous stare of his eyes shooting daggers at the back of my head. If looks could kill I would have been dead long ago.

My wolf traits are starting to become stronger. I healed quicker than I ever have. I let this hope swell in my heart. Soon very soon I would not be alone anymore. I would have my Mate and my Wolf. I can sense my Wolf even though she is dormant inside me. I know she will love and accept me as I do her. I don’t know who my Mate is but I have a vision of a tall man with rust colored skin, long limbed, with a head full of messy hair that is black as the night sky, and when he meets my eyes I am consumed. He has the most beautiful eyes. The colors change and flicker with each emotion that flashes through him. I am overwhelmed and full of this love that is ravaging me from the inside. My heart begins to quicken, and it is ready to burst. I let this feeling carry me to my self-assigned seat in the back of the bus. No one would dare sit next to me for fear they will catch whatever affliction it is that causes my strangeness. I let all the voices in the crowded bus and inside my head form a jumbled chorus. I turn up the music on my phone and let the lyrics wash over me until I can hear nothing but a beating heart. This is my solace my happy place. The place where I feel nothing but what I want to feel. When I open my eyes, what feels like seconds later we are at the place that I hate most in the world our town high school. Lunar High School is a small high school which houses mostly wolves but there are humans and other species that walk the halls. I don’t care to investigate what others are here. I am not even accepted by my own kind and my skin prickles with fear when I think about how other species would accept me. As they pass me in the hall and occasionally bump me on their way, I continue my invisible trek to my first class of the day English.

I am never seen anywhere that I go but, in this school it’s even more clear that I do not exist. I am completely imperceptible. The teachers do not know my name. They never call on me. They never look my way. They sense my strangeness. I don’t feel strange despite the constant reminders verbally or internally that I am.  All my afflictions have been a part of me for as long as I can remember. I embrace them proudly though I cannot fathom why. My attention is drawn to a corner in the front of the room. I do not let my eyes shift there. Lauren Hall is sitting there and Asher who is her constant partner is whispering something in her ear. I let myself be absorbed by Lauren and its as though Asher is whispering in my ear. Asher whispers “you are driving me mad” I can feel the sensations of her body. She lights up on the inside. She is drawn to him. He gives her sparks. He is her ignition. I wonder if they are “True Mates”? She subconsciously shifts in her chair bringing her ear closer and I can feel her pulse begin to quicken she is warm all over. I feel the heat penetrate through me. She subconsciously moves her hair behind her ear and Asher plants a small kiss where her fingers just touched, and I am completely electrified. All these foreign feelings begin to flood my body. I feel the way I feel when I am having a dream of my “Mystery Boy” warmth constricting every vessel in my body. Is this love? Is this passion? I feel Lauren squeeze her knees together. The warmth is spreading to other places on my body. It begins to settle in my core, and I am overwhelmed by the sensation. I quickly jump back into my body and when I do, I stand to quickly and hit my head on a shelf behind me. I slap my hand over my mouth just as a wounded cry escapes my lips in almost a howl.

My head is bleeding and the teacher for the first time in four years looks over at me in surprise and asks “Miss? Are you alright?” I can’t speak so I just shake my head no. I run out the classroom clutching my throbbing head. I do not want to be seen. I do not even go to the nurse’s office I just sit on the bench outside with a wad of paper towels on my head and wait for my skin to being to heal itself. I am mortified. My day isn’t even over yet. Can this day get any worse?

The rest of the day passed by and I was able to maintain my usual ethereal appearance. Now it was time for Pack exercises. I loath pack exercises. I am usually the weakest of all the wolves. Alpha John likes for me to partner up with the strongest male wolves. He says it will make me stronger. Its hard to maintain my invisibility when I must partner with the strongest wolf. I am always the center of attention and the laughingstock of the entire pack. I prefer to not be seen. That is a misery I am completely comfortable with. Then the very thing that I live for and I am being completely sarcastic when I say that happens. Surprise surprise, Asher future Alpha heir Asher is my partner today. Let the good times roll. I roll up my nonexistent sleeves and go to the center of the ring that sits in the big building that is used for most of our pack gatherings and meetings. The large building houses exercise equipment and a large training ring made just for pummeling. I close my eyes briefly and open them to look at the calamity before my eyes.

There he is Asher all Six feet 3 inches of him standing center ring popping his knuckles and gleefully smiling right at me. I cannot stand the victorious look on his smug face. I wish I had the strength to tear it off. He begins to plan in his head all the ways he can inflict torture on me. I am not a short girl. I stand at five feet and nine inches. I have always been awkward and uncoordinated. I am hoping that when I transition and fully become a werewolf that this will all change. I watch all of Asher’s emotions play on his corrupt face. He is trying hard not to think about what his first move will be. I feel hyper focused. A surge of power that I have never known begins to build in the fibers of my muscles I get into a fighting stance. I didn’t even know I knew what a fighting stance was. I do not even have to listen for Asher’s first move. I see it just before it happens. He reaches with both hands for my hair with the intent of smashing my nose on his knee. I spin so fast I question where it came from. I am not in control of any of my movements. I smile of recompense illuminates my face. I throw my elbow across Asher’s confused face. The blood from the open wound on his cheek sprays my face. I do not care. Faster then any eye could perceive I have flipped Asher on his back and begun to pummel furiously at his face and body. I let my fist fly with fury completely unbound. I do not stop until I feel hands pull me from Asher’s bloody body. I turn around and release a terrifying growl at the hands that have pulled me away from my prey. I am transformed and I do not relent to the power until I see my reflection in the minds of my pack mates. The looks and feelings of strangeness have been replaced with abhorrence. I am a monster. I bolt as fast as I can out of the building. There is an eagerness in my steps and the power that I felt inside me is still there as my legs pump furiously. I am not on the pack lands anymore. I have subconsciously taken myself to the land that stretches just outside of our pack grounds where I sit sometimes and stare at my reflection in the waters and dream about places and times beyond my hollow existence.

 I am still covered in Asher’s blood when I finally slow down, I am not out of breath. I look at my knuckles which were bruised and bloodied and they are completely healed. The only thing that remains is Asher’s blood.  I almost vomit when the realization of what I have done hits me. What am I? Who am I? When I stare at my reflection at the water’s edge, I do not recognize the girl who is staring back at me. She is fierce. Her eyes glow and shine like the warmth of amber. Her curly copper hair is flowing behind her. She is strong, tall and possess a confidence and assurance that I have never known. There is blood speckled about her she is not strange nor timid. She is a warrior and I believe this infallibly.