BEAR HUGS

This story started during the time of my recovery after Lawrence and I separated. We are not officially separated or broken up though, but we no longer see each other and he stops his communications with me. I was already recovering from the heartaches when I met Lawrence by accident again, while I was waiting for Ryza in Cafe' Latresse, one of the famous suburb coffee shops that I loved so much because of the French ambiance and architecture. The copper railings, tables, chairs and also the collection of their portraits make you feel that paying for the coffee is like paying for a good background with a taste of French style. I was going to attend a seminar on the latest marketing strategies and concepts we needed for our company and I was chosen as the new Marketing Manager in our division together with Ryza to help me out. She was actually a friend, confidante and my assistant. She knew everything about me and even how many failed relationships I had and the reason why I don't want to be tied up in a serious relationship. Every time I feel that I am on that path, I will eventually lie low and cut ties or break up. I thought that I would never make any mistakes when I decided to accept Lawrence and his proposal. I eventually accepted the idea of getting married because we really love each other that much and I was so in love that time and seeing him made me even confused " Gayle, this is serious! I am serious! I don't want you to get away with me anymore. Not seeing by my side in the will not complete my life. You are my life and future, I love you!" while he was holding my hand. I could feel the coldness of his palm while he was holding my hand and pulling the string. The pink, yellow and light blue balloons and rose petals of the same color fell from the ceiling of the same cafe I am in now and he put his hand in his blazer's pocket and opened the small light blue box and there it showed the ring, glittering from the light. He took it from the box and put it on my ring finder smiling. I eventually said "Yes!" to him and he embraced me and kissed my hand where he put the ring, then on my cheek and on my forehead. We were so happy at that time. I never imagined myself getting married after the tragic incident that happened to my parents that left me a very traumatic experience. I was only 26 then and we were already working in one of the multi-companies we have in Makati. Financially speaking, we are both stable. I was even willing to sacrifice everything for him and live a life with him. Lawrence always told me how much he loved me and made me feel that I was the only woman important to him besides his mom, of course, in every day of our lives. I was the most important thing to him at that time and I felt that. We were both denying the fact that maybe we were both at fault for the failure of our relationship. I trusted him so much and maybe he loved me too much. That is the reason why he ran away without me knowing, just leaving me without any clue what really happened. I was prepared to accept all his flaws more and maybe be a bit more patient with him. But as the years passed, we grew apart until the time that we no longer knew each other and I felt that he was slowly drifting apart. I grew up and learned with him during the time of our relationship. He taught me a lot but maybe I wasn't ready to change at that time because I am used to the way I live, where I have everything, and I met Lawrence at the seminar for the new hires where he was one of the speakers and facilitator of the event. He said " Hi Mai, you look intriguing and interesting and I like your answer earlier, which gives me said that you're a smart lady." I was surprised and told him " Oh me?" he said " There is a naughty look in your eyes and the way you smile intrigues me also."... We shook hands and he thought that I was younger than him. We found out that we both graduated at the same academy where we are both academic scholars. We went to the same school as well during our high school and were always competing for debate, speech and quiz bee and in college we were at the same college but in a different department. I was at the college of Psychology and he was at the college of law. I was thinking of doing my masters after graduation to continue my second course in public administration and then continue college law but there were things that I needed to do after my father passed away and my mom was usually just drinking. I began to look for a job to support both my mom and me after my father's business go bankrupt and we needed to adjust our finances, since dad left more liabilities to pay, such as loans and mortgages rather than his assets. I need to sell most of his assets besides our ancestral house to pay all the debts he left. My company's share was lost but I was given a change to work for the firm my father established and to support our daily needs. I was inspired by his talk and it was really moving and it made me admire him. This is the very reason why I fell in love with this guy, because I like smart, intelligent guys. He was a prosecutor at that time when we met and he actually took my father's case and I realized that I was enjoying his company because he was smart, though he was really not my type of guy at first. I go for the not-so muscular men, white Asian guys and those chinky eyes like most of the Korean, Japanese and Chinese looks. Those are the usual type of man I got attracted to. Lawrence was like that. He was slim, clean cut and always a tidy suit and his white skin was so pleasing that it made his personality even better. He was like someone you can immediately trust or maybe, because of this work, probably that is why you can easily feel comfortable with him. Oh beware my heart, you could get scammed or conned by this man by the time you fall in love with him. I remember those days. It was so vivid. I smiled at the thought and I told myself to hush if I didn't want the attention of others to be on me. I was just imaging our past when someone just tapped my shoulder. It was Ryza. She was my friend but she was the cousin of my ex- Lawrence. We just actually talked every time we see each other on any occasion and in the office I am always checking how I am after the break up. Ryza told me that he saw Lawrence and she thinks that he will be one of the speakers of the seminar again. I wasn't expecting to see him at this time, not this early. I saw him in the corner talking to a lady. Is she her new girlfriend? What am I thinking I actually don't care about it, right? We are over and we will never come back together again. What is he thinking after he was lost for 3 years and 3 months and now again? I learned that he was one of the top caliber lawyers of the Seunchon Group, a Korean company that has an office in Singapore. He became successful, I heard, and in this company he became the resident lawyer in a big company and gained his success in the corporate world without the help of his father. He resents his father that much and I wonder why a son of a great family and a conglomerate working in another company makes his own name. I wonder what will happen after this accidental meeting that we have, but I disregard the idea, since I am more focused on knowing Liam Keller, the man behind the success of our company and the one who replaced Lawrence in their company and I was intrigued about how he wanted to connect with me or is he really establishing a connection or is it just in my thoughts. I shook my head and tapped it with my palm, then I heard the deep toned voice again. " Are you doing just fine? or already bored with the seminar we are having?" He grinned while looking at me. I don't know what to say. I was a bit nervous, maybe because of Lawrence's presence or is it because of the person I am talking to right now. "Uhm...I am just fine and I enjoyed my meal though." I said and continued " I actually learned a lot from your talk and I will use those tips." "Well , I am glad to hear that" He smiled and I saw that little dipoles on both of his cheeks and those round deep set eyes. I left and excused myself, saying that I'd be going to the powder room, but actually I just wanted to escape from those investigative eyes of Lawrence. I don't know what he is thinking right now and I am glad that he is enjoying the company of the other attendees. After a while, I was shocked to see him in front of me while he was just there talking earlier with others. I covered my mouth with both of my palms and immediately touched my chest because of my surprise. "What are you thinking? and what are you doing here?" I asked Lawrence " What? me? I just want to say hi and know how are you? and if you enjoy the seminar, that's it!" and he scratched his head and touched his hair like he was fixing it. He was still a good-looking, smart man. I fell in love. "Hey! don't try to be cheeky on me, okay?" I said and he answered " I am not!" and he took his handkerchief and wiped his forehead with it. "By the way... Where are you staying?" he asked, and I told him " at the hotel in Makati Avenue, since we are hosting the event, and he said " Okay, I was booked in Dusit for 3 days and I was hoping we could catch up a bit, you know ; like the old times?" he said with a grin and lowered his head. What is he saying "Like the old times?" what does he mean by "We caught up a bit?". I can feel the tension in my body, but I don't want him to feel strange about it and be awkward. So I just replied " Yeah! maybe some other time?" and I smiled and waved at time, then put my eyes in the powder room's direction and immediately understood me. He said" Oh I'm sorry I didn't know... Okay, see you next time probably, right?" and he turned around and left. I called him "Hey! Lawrence, your talk will start in the next 45 minutes. Good luck!". Making a fist and saying fighting like we used to. What am I thinking? I don't want to jump into conclusions and I don't want to start another problem and right now I just want to focus on this event and get the promotion. I need to slowly accomplish my goals and the plans I had when my father passed away. I was thinking of visiting him also and bringing him fresh flowers. I need to consult something with my dad and update him about what I did, what I have been doing and the progress I am making. I promised him to get back what we'd lost and find the real reason for his accident and probably to lead me to the real culprits. I tried my best to stay away from Lawrence, so I immediately left after his talk and the event. I was delighted to know that he never changed and he was the same person I used to know. Actually, he even broke the expectations I had and he didn't know that it was my decision to book him at the Dusit Hotel so I could avoid these accidental meetings that are happening now. I walked through the connecting park and restaurants in Makati Avenue. I needed to go to the other side of the road to get a taxi to go to my father's... Suddenly, when I was about to cross, a hand held me and stopped me a bit. It was Lawrence, the man I am avoiding.