Blue

Chapter Four

Ilaria was still arranging the small table, thinking about what to do. Having to bring glasses from the kitchen, to find the pie she still had left from April, to bring teaspoons and small plates, napkins and the entire  list she was mentally writing helped her ignore Sergei's gaze who, from the armchair he was staying in, kept watching her every move. When she finally ran out of things to do, the girl took a seat on the couch, avoiding sitting in front or next to him. She found an angle from where looking straight at him was uncomfortable enough to prevent her from staring.

" I didn't know what type of chocolate you like so I took something with different flavors."

" Different flavors is good." Ilaria felt like an i***t as soon as the word left her mouth, so she added quickly " I like vanilla and caramel especially, but chocolate is chocolate, and no one debates its divine taste, no matter the flavor."

He smiled dimly and nodded, seeming as speechless, as Ilaria felt. He fixed his gaze on the bottle of wine, looking concentrated, as if he was planning on opening it with the force of his mind. Despite the uncomfortable position, Ilaria found herself analyzing him again; his raven-black hair, his white skin, his dark t-shirt that revealed a sculpted body with perfect muscles... She didn't dare look at his face, yet she already knew that his lips were full and most probably soft and that his eyes were blue enough to make any girl beg for a stare from him. She cleared her throat, casting away the naughty thoughts that began to take roots in her mind.

" Do you...?"

They both began speaking at the same time, stopping just as sudden.

" Yes?" asked Ilaria.

" No, go first. Say what you've got to say."

" I was about to ask you if you want some pie. My neighbor brought it in yesterday. She's nice. "

Talking too much. Again.

" The pie?"

" No. April, my neighbor."

" Ah. Yes, sure. I'll like some pie."

Happy to have something to do, other than staring, Ilaria cut two pieces of pie, placing each one of them on a plate then, careful not to touch him, she handed it to him.

" So," started Ilaria, watching him take a small bite from the pie, ignoring the teaspoon, " you said you needed my help."

He swallowed and nodded.

" Yes. But I'm too sober for that."

She giggled and he seemed amused too, curving his lips into a smile.

" Perhaps we should open the wine."

" I thought you weren't going to suggest that."

Irony was a good way to relax the atmosphere, Ilaria noticed, while pouring alcohol into the two glasses.

" Cheers!"

" Cheers!"

The first sip of wine went down their throats as a well-expected medicine, blurring their senses just enough to ignore the s****l tension drawn in the air. The whole glass followed immediately after. Without a word, Ilaria filled them again; for courage, for a light talk and maybe for s*x with no inhibitions. Ilaria placed the glass on the table, realizing her mind went off the topic. There should be no s*x in her brain. Not for the moment at least.

" You know, I've just realized I allowed a complete stranger to enter my house."

" That's indeed a very bad thing to do, Miss Wilson."

" Ilaria. Just Ilaria. I sure as hell won't call you Mr. Polunin."

" You don't have to, Wilson. I'm the one needing help here."

" Oh, yes. The helping part." Ilaria secretly hoped he needed some help with relaxing his muscles; a special muscle targeted. ‘Damn, you, Ilaria. Stop that!’ she begged her sick mind, moving a little further from him.

" What is it that you need my help with?"

He poured himself another glass of wine

" I know who you are."

Ilaria stared at him, then blinked a few times.

" Okay, you got me. I'm Ilaria Wilson. Take me to jail for that." She left out the part where she was telling him to handcuff her; it created unwanted fantasies in her mind.

" What?"

" s**t. Did I say out loud the part with the handcuffs?"

Sergei stared at her again.

" What?" he repeated. " What handcuffs?"

" Never mind. You were just telling me how you know who I am."

He shook his head, looking a bit suspicious at her, but, in the end, decided not to ask any more about her previous words.

" Yes. You are the one who wrote ' One Day to Bloom'. I recognized you as soon as you let down the window of your car."

If the wine hadn't made Ilaria dizzy, his sentence clearly did. She took another sip of wine, watching him above the edge of the glass and nodded slowly.

" Yes. But how do you know?"

" It was Natalia's favorite."

She tried not to make a face at the mention of his ex; instead, she drank another glass of wine. Soon they were going to need more alcohol, and the discussion was just at the beginning.

" Natalia is my previous girlfriend." added Sergei, noticing Ilaria didn't replied.

" I know." the words escaped her mouth before having the chance to be filtered by her brain, so she bit her inner cheek, trying to find a suitable response to that. "You told me you were a ballet dancer, so I googled you. I found some pieces about her too."

It sounded reasonable for an excuse, and Sergei seemed to accept that as a plausible explanation.

" Of course you did... Then you probably know I took a break from ballet for a while. I came to Yachats to film a movie and she was to be my co-star. "

" That's what you had to fix this morning?"

He shook his head, pouring what was left in the bottle into the glass.

" No. The manager called me this morning: she dropped the movie. "

She waited for him to add something else, but he just stared at the empty glass in his hands.

" I'm sorry, but I just don't see what you mean."

He sighed.

" I took the role to spend time with her, but when she realized she was going to act with me, she bailed."

She stared at him incredulously.

" You want her back?"

" I need her back."

Ilaria bit her lip, studying him again. He was still handsome as hell, but when she reached his faced she noticed something that has been hidden before: sadness. Deep, rough sadness.

" You still love her" she whispered, all her fantasies and wild desires dying with that sudden realization.

" She is the love of my life."

Alcohol made him deep, noted Ilaria. She couldn't quite judge clearly, but she could feel all her dirty thoughts crumbling to pieces. She was still painfully aware of how hot he was, how perfect he would have felt but now, without his arrogance mask printed on his face, he was no longer a God. He was vulnerable, human; a demigod. And with that, she couldn't screw. After all, Leslie was wrong: she wouldn’t end up on top of him, nor underneath him. She would just roll besides him and help him. As a friend. Maybe she was an i***t, because the s****l frustration she felt wasn't going to disappear just because he was in love…or maybe she just had a thing for broken people.

" She was your other half." She added.

If she wasn't going to get wild with him, she could as well talk about Natalia. Be supportive. Trying to be a good friend.

" She was my better half." Sergei corrected her. " And she left me, for the damage I cause all the time."

By now, Ilaria could tell he was a bit drunk. A demigod who gets drunk quickly - what an irony.

" I'm sure you wouldn't understand. You are a romantic. And you're pretty. Who would leave you?"

Ilaria huffed. The pain she had felt when she’d found out about Connor surfaced the flood of feelings that had turned her into an emotional mess for the last three months. She stood up, stumbling to the kitchen and returned a few seconds after with a bottle of vodka in her hands. She could as well tell him about Connor; there was no way he could pity himself more than her after that.

" I don't think I need that." said Sergei.

" No, but I do, to tell you the next short story."

He shrugged and allowed her to fill his glass. It was a wine glass, but it felt as a common understanding not to care about that.

" I'll send my regards to Natasha and Alexei" said Ilaria after a full mouth of vodka.

" Mine too. This is strong enough to kill a bull."

" Try not to fall asleep while I'm talking, Ken-boy."

" How did you call me?"

" Just shut up and listen. I am about to tell you my sad failed romance. "

He raised his hands, in a gesture of surrender and took off his shoes, stretching his legs on the coffee table.

" I'd been dating a guy for the last two years. Connor."

" See, you can sustain a healthy relationship"

" Just shut up."

He took another mouth of vodka, and gestured towards her to go on.

" He went on a trip in Alps with some friends and business partners." She paused again, for a small drink. " The signal there sucked. Wi-fi or any internet connection was non-existent. A bonding trip they called it. Well, he did bond. With one of my friends, Monica. I found out from his brother, who felt responsible for his brother's actions. "

Sergei's eyes were glassy and shiny.  Ilaria probably looked just the same. Two drunk people in a living room, complaining about their failed love-lives. Lovely pair, she thought.

" So what did you do? " his voice was hoarse when he talked.

" I broke up with him on his f*******: page and tagged Monica in the post too. It was up for a week before they returned from the Alps and got internet access and it had hundreds of likes and dozens of comments, including one from his parents and Monica's fiancé."

Sergei stared laughing so suddenly, it made Ilaria startle, then burst into laughter. By the time he was able to ask something else, he was on the floor, wiping his tears.

" I must be a horrible person to laugh at this. It must have been painful for you."

" It was. But you know what was the worst part?"

" That he cheated on you with your friend?"

" Exactly. I mean, it's such a cliché I can't even use that in a book. What good to have your heart broken if your ex is i***t enough to make it unremarkably dull?"

He was still laughing, his eyes beginning to close.

" Yes, an i***t. Did he try to fix things with you? "

" No. He just wanted to know if we could still be friends. "

" And what did you say?" his voice was sleepy, his eyes shut. He looked like a kid waiting for his mother to end the good-night story.

" Sure. Imaginary friends. "

He curved his lips into a thin smile and Ilaria smiled too. Drunk and dizzy, yet a bit relieved, she felt as if his presence was the calming element she needed all along.

" So, what was the thing you need my help with?" she asked, laying down the couch and leaning her head on one of the embroidered cushions.

She waited for an answer, but the only sound she heard was a quiet snore.