Mated or fated? (Completed Book #5 of the blood moon saga)

16

"I'm tired. Do you all mind letting me sleep for a while? i'll see you all tomorrow"

James looked lost.

"Do you want me to stay?"

She shook her head

"No, go to Lola, I know she's probably blaming herself right now. she needs you"

He nodded and reached over and kissed her cheek, then her father did the same. Caden just sits and watches us with interest as Baylee gets up and pulls on his arm and soon they are all gone.

"Can you lock the door please, I don't want to see anyone else tonight"

I kissed her head and set her on the bed then quickly locked the door. She pulls off her trousers and throws them on the floor. I pull off my own and then get into bed. She pulls my T-shirt from my body and climbs into my chest.

"Can we watch something?"

She whispers

"Sure, what do you want to watch?"

"Something funny? Grown ups?"

"Good choice"

I reach for the remote and put grown ups on

"What will happen when you meet your mate?"

I pull her face up so she's looking at me

"I don't know anything other than I love you and I'm never leaving you. Mate or no mate"

"Will you help me get stronger? Stronger so I can kill him if he comes for me?"

"Definitely."

"I love you mouth"

"I love you too jam"

———

Megan's POV

There were no words to describe the pain that tore through my body. Like a red hot branding iron tore into my chest and pulled it apart layer by layer in an agonisingly slow pace.

But then it changes. Someone's arms wrapped around me and suddenly the flames that engulfed me cooled down at his touch. I never and I mean never wanted to let him go.

Something strong snaps.

Something like a rubber band and pain so overwhelming I nearly throw up hits me but then it's gone.

And I swear I thought I went from hell straight to heaven only to then realise it was Brian. My Brian.

The longer the pain stays away the angrier I become. Brian didn't leave me. He stood by my side when we fought. Yes we ended up in different directions but at least he tried to fight by my side. But Xavier had to be a d**k and run into battle on his own with no one covering him.

Benji jumped in but was quickly overwhelmed and that gave them a chance to strike. I watch it and rewatch it in my head. Everything suddenly made sense. Baylee crying, James and Lola upset.

They knew all along. There was nothing they could have done; this was a decision made by him alone. He chose to fight on his own and he died on his own.

Harper

He f****d up and now we need to live with it

Harper was just as angry as I was. She sank into Brian's arms with me. Happy that someone was able to ease our pain. We were both confused as to why but we didn't question it.

I didn't even feel embarrassed when he stripped himself down and held me naked. In Fact I loved it. I loved how his skin cooled mine and how loved he made me feel.

I never wanted him to leave me ever. I want to be in his arms until the pain goes away and I know this pain didn't just disappear. I knew it was there outside this bubble waiting to attack and take me down. It's Bubbling up and ready to strangle me.

When he ordered my sister to get me underwear and he dressed me I almost fell at his feet. When he cradled me in his arms I felt complete. All pain was lost, left behind were memories of what is now my past; but I couldn't seem to get past the anger enough to actually feel sad that he was gone.

Brian wouldn't leave me and I know that he would be by my side until the end. He is a special kind of person. One that was there for me when Xavier wasn't. He was the one to carry me to bed when I was upset. He stayed with me when I asked him to. He defended me when Xavier didn't and had my back when I felt like Xavier walked away and left it open for someone to stab me in it. He followed me around to make sure I was ok.

Then when mum showed me his thoughts it suddenly made sense. He loved me from the first moment he saw my face. The bond between me and Xavier had distracted me from that fact. Even when Xavier had assaulted me he had felt that pain. He felt me be with another and that hurt my soul. I hated that I hurt him when he did nothing but protect and love me. Love me so much that he would stand back and watch me love another.

We sat in silence watching the movie. The noise helped but I couldn't concentrate on it. I all of a sudden felt claustrophobic. Not in Brian's arms but in this house surrounded in the memories of Xavier. The anger I felt towards him didn't help. I jumped up surprising Brian.

"What's wrong?"

He held my face and I smiled

"Can we go somewhere? Just the 2 of us? I don't want to be here right now. I just want to get away for a while"

He studied my face

"What about your family? Are you sure?"

I nodded at him

"I've never been more sure in my entire life. Just for a few days to clear my head"

"I'll follow you anywhere. Let's get dressed"

I jumped out of bed then realised all my stuff is in my old room. I had to face it sometime so it might as well be now.

"I'll grab clothes for a few days. Come find me when your finished"

He hesitated

"I don't want to leave you"

"Ok you pack first then we can face that together"

I answered, happy he doesn't want to leave me. He jumped into action and started to throw stuff into his bag quickly and he dressed himself in sweatpants and a hoodie. Only then did I realise that the pain was almost gone even when I wasn't in his arms. I sighed in relief, thankful for whatever strange connection I had with Brian that would be strong enough to break my bond.

He took my hand and we walked towards my room. We stood outside it for a while, unable to move and open the door.

"We could just buy you new stuff?"

I looked at him and smiled.

"No, it's faster if we just do it."

I opened the door and took a breath as xaviers scent surrounded me. It smelled nice but not as mouth watering as before. I shook the memories off and ran to my closet. I threw on a hoodie and packed some stuff quickly pulling on socks and shoes.

Then we left the room not looking back. As we made it to the kitchen I needed coffee and I was surprised to see Caden awake. He sat at the counter drinking tequila.

"Hey bro"

His face met mine and his features softened

"Hey, how are you feeling?"

"Angry and claustrophobic, we are going to get out of here for a few days. Are you ok?"

He chuckled and shook his head

"You amaze me. You have been through hell and back tonight and your worried about me"

I sit down and wait for the coffee Brian comes behind me and rests his head on mine and wraps his arms around me. Caden watches us and smiles

"Your like her wolves"

I raise my eyebrow at him and he chuckles

"Baylees wolves take her pain, they pledged their lives to her and would die for her. Put her before everything and everyone else. Brian is like your wolves''

I smiled up at him. He was deep in thought thinking about it.

"What's up with you caden? It's not like you to be on your own?"

He smiled and took another drink

"I'm angry at myself. I should have killed that bastard a long time ago but I was trying to avoid a war and now this has happened. My baby sister lost her mate and I watched her fall apart and it was the hardest thing I've ever had to witness. And selfishly all I could think while it happened was I'm so glad your Ailm bond had not formed because the thought of losing you hurts so much. And I just can't seem to stop thinking if i would have just killed him this would never have happened, then to top it of when mum showed Baylee your story and I see everything Baylee see's and I mean it when I feel like a total incompetent asshole for missing the signs and I'm so sorry I didn't see it sooner. I would have killed him Megan. Never let anyone hurt you like that again. You kill them. I don't care if it starts a war. Promise me you will kill them"

"I promise"

"I'm sorry for not killing jake sooner. It's me fault"

"Maybe so, but I would have been left with a mate that choose everything else over me"

He raised his eyebrow at me

"I watched you fall apart megan. That I will never forget so there must be some part of you that cared, even after what he had done, so I know you don't believe that, not really"

"Yes I do. When he upset me he f****d off and left Brian to look after me, keep me company, help me sleep. Then he chose random girls over me. Again making Brian stand up for me. Help me when I was hurt. He f****d off and left me to fight on my own when Brian was the one to fight by my side. Never leaving me. He did unimaginable things to me, then made me believe I was crazy and then lied about it all. You watched me fall apart because the pain of his side of the bond died and I realised I was going to have to live forever in that pain but now the bond is gone somehow so now I'm pissed and I see him for what he was. I don't know if that makes me selfish or maybe I'm just Grieving but either way this wasn't your fault. Why start a war when we didn't need to. As long as he dies I'll be happy."

"Can I hug you?"

I chuckle and walk over to him

"Your my brother Ofcourse you can"

He pulls me into a tight hug

"I love you sis. Where are you going to go?"

I hug him back and I enjoy the hug. My big brother was an amazing alpha, an amazing mate and father but he was also a great big brother.

"I don't know. Drive around for a while"

"You could go to Bora Bora or Brazil? I can have the plane ready in a few hours"

I pull back and smile

"That sounds amazing. Brian do you want to go to Bora Bora?"

"If that's what you want then that's what I want"

I smile and fill my cup with coffee and hand Brian one.

"Ok let's do it"

Caden smiles and pulls out his phone and starts making calls. I pulled out some cake and decided to try and eat something. I hand Brian and caden a fork and dive into the cake in front of me.

Evelyn's cake was beyond comparison. I loved it and so did everyone that ate it. Brian moaned when he tasted it making me giggle

"It's amazing isn't it"

"So good, what the hell?"

I nod and eat some more. Dad walks in and I throw him a fork and hand him a cup of coffee

"You look better"

I nod and push myself closer to Brian who puts his arm around me and I relax. Dad watches us with fascination but doesn't say anything

"Yeah I am. We are going to go to Bora Bora for a while. I need to get away"

He smiles and nods.

"That's understandable. When are you leaving?"

"Plane will be ready in 5 hours, iv text the groundskeeper, everything will be ready by the time you arrive and all you need to do is text him when your ready and he will come lift you in the boat"

I nod. I was actually excited. After my siblings were attacked in Bora Bora my parents sold the old house and bought a small island off the coast and built a house there. It was amazing and quiet and I loved it. It was easily my most favourite place in the world.

"Before you go we should really cremate Xavier"

Anger bubbles up and Harper growls. I don't know why but I don't even want to think about him. I certainly don't want to see bits of him.

Harper

Neither do I!

"I don't care what you do with him!"

"I understand that's how you feel now but if your not there you might regret it down the line"

"He's right Megan. I know you're angry. I know I'm angry, but no matter what he deserves to move on and we both should be there"

Harper

Why does he have to be the voice of reason? Why is he right? I just want to run away and never think about him again

Me

Me too. But if we do this we can leave and not worry about anything else

"Fine"

I look at the time it's 5am. I haven't slept and I don't feel tired. I fill my coffee cup again and sit on a seat. Brain doesn't move with me. He looks like he's scared so I link him

Me

What's wrong?

Brian

I don't want you to be angry at me

I pull on his shirt so he moves behind me and holds me. I rest my head on his chest

Me

I'm not angry at you, I'm angry because what you said is true. Please don't be afraid to hold me. I need you

The next thing I knew I was in the air. Brian sat down and plopped me on his knee. I cuddled into his chest as Lucy arrived. She ran over to us and pulled us both into a hug

"Oh Megan, Brian, I am so sorry. I'm so sorry this has happened"

I can't stop the tears that fall as my heart tugs. A glimpse of the pain appearing. But brian squeezed me tighter like he knew it was coming and he chased it away. Scaring it from my body and keeping me safe. When she pulled back and held my face I really realized how puffy and red hers was.

"Lucy, you shouldn't be here. You should take some time he was like a son to you"

Tears ran down her face faster. I watched them slide down her cheeks and fall to her chest

"He was, but so is brian and that applies to you as well. I'm glad he's looking after you. I'm glad your bond is helping you both through this. I need to keep busy. No point in stewing over things that can't be changed"

"When everyone wakes up we will cremate him then me and Brian are taking a trip to clear our heads"

"Good. I'm glad you need it lu.. I mean alpha"

I froze. Alpha? I'm an alpha now? Do I even want that title?

I push the thought out and decide to deal with it later. Baylee walks in and kisses Caden, grabbing coffee and cups.

"Did you sleep?"

Caden asks her. She smiles and shakes her head

"No. But I feel better after the rest. Is everything ready for the cremation?"

"I'm just letting Benji have a few more hours to sleep then I'll wake him up and sort it out. Megan until you get back I need you to accept me and your mother into the pack so we can take over while your gone"

"What do I do?"

Dad grabs a knife and slices his hand and hands it to me. I do the same and he brings our hands together. I feel an elastic band pull into place making him a pack member. When mum arrives I do the same with her.

When everyone is awake it's 7am so I call on the entire pack because I'm the only one who can do it until I give that honour to dad and benji.

Benji walks straight up to both me and Brian and pulls us into a hug. Tears start to flow again and I let them as benji holds us both. He pulls away and holds my face in his hands

"You both look after each other when you're gone. And take as much time as you need"

I give him a small smile and he kisses my forehead and steps back so I can link the pack.

Me

Please gather at the cremation sight to say farewell to your alpha in 20minutes

Voice after voice cried through the link. I cut it off before it gave me a migraine. Cadens growl makes me jump as his eyes unglazed

"He's not f*****g there! He knew we would retaliate and isn't f*****g there! Bastard is gone. They haven't seen him in months. I will find him Megan and I swear he will suffer for what he's done"

James growls beside me and squeezes my hand. I don't bother saying anything because what is the point?

After a few minutes we gathered outside. He would be cremated and then his ashes will be buried with the other alphas. He would be given a head stone and a memorial in the future but that doesn't need to happen for months. Maybe even years in some cases because apparently it's too difficult.

Brian stands behind me the entire time never leaving my side. His hands held onto my waist tightly as everyone gathered. I didn't even know these people and the sympathy they held on their face made me crumble.

I hated this. Hated being the centre of attention and hated being pitied but I understand why. I get it. I wonder if it is normal to feel this angry. Maybe I would miss him someday but right now I just want to scream at how furious I was so instead I cried angry and pissed off tears.

When the crowd gathered I had to talk.

"We are gathered here to wish our alpha fair well and let him rise with our ancestors before him. Caden will you do the honours"