Big Flames and Small

The building was on fire. The smell of smoke and the loud cries of distant sirens woke Oliver. What didn’t wake him was any of the fire detectors throughout his apartment and outside in the hallway. “Goddamned landlord.” He jumped out of bed and, breaking every rule, took time to pull on jeans, slip a hoodie over his T-shirt, and shove his bare feet into a pair of sneakers. Or maybe it didn’t break any rules at all. Oliver had never been in a fire. He’d never been nearly naked outside in early January either. On his way out the door, he grabbed his keys and the laptop bag he’d dropped on the entry table in his hurry to climb into bed the night before, and took the steep flight of stairs down to the first floor. Whatever the hour, Oliver was fully awake by the time he was pounding on the downstairs apartment. “Mia?” When there was no answer, he yelled louder, pounding harder, and tried the knob. “Mia? You in there?” He was about to test his luck at forcing his way inside, when the door flew open and an over-stuffed trash bag was pushed into his arms. “Dickbag fucklord.” Mia’s hair stuck out like wild tentacles, but she was, at least, mostly dressed. “Did you even hear a fire alarm?” “Outside.” They could discuss wringing their landlord’s neck from the safety of the lawn. Their building was three floors of ancient kindling—the top-floor apartment empty as of a week ago, thank God—and it could burst into flames at any minute. Outside, firetrucks were pulling onto the street, the noise deafening so close, their lights bouncing eerily off the naked, skeletal trees that lined the sidewalks. But flames were already well on their way to consuming the top floor of their apartment block, and black smoke poured from the roof top of a neighboring building, another one of the old, wooden structure rental units that had been there since the early sixties. “Fuckity-fuckerson.” Mia had always had a way with words. “We’re screwed.” “We’ll at least be sleeping in a hotel.” Oliver remembered the wallet he hadn’t thought to grab from his dresser in his hurry to get downstairs. “Or on a park bench somewhere.” He watched the chaos of firefighters pour into the yard and work to extinguish the blaze, while soaking the surrounding buildings that had yet to catch fire. And Mia wandered off in search of whoever was handing out the blankets that were materializing among the small group of pajama-clad renters. The fight against the flames were useless after the dry, hot summer, and Oliver did a mental inventory of everything he was going to lose. If not to the fire itself, to the smoke. His bed, his couch, his X-Box—a Christmas gift to himself—all of his books, every stitch of clothing except for what was on his back. His phone. Fuck. How had he forgotten his phone? A loud groan and the sudden collapse of the building’s roof sent a shriek through the onlookers and Oliver stumbled back, the size and weight of Mia’s bag awkward in his arms. “Let me help.” Mia dropped a handful of gray blankets to the ground and gave him a hand, lowering the bag down onto the grass at the side of the road. Oliver thanked her and shook out his arms. “What’s in there? That thing weighs a ton.” “Scott’s here.” Mia handed one of the two blankets over to Oliver before pointing to where firefighters worked to pull a heavy length of hose across the lawn closer to where a third building had started to smoke. “Over there.” “Of course he is.” Because that was how Oliver’s life worked—waiting until he looked like s**t to throw an ex-boyfriend at him. “How do I look?” “Like someone whose house is on fire.” That’s what he was afraid of. Oliver didn’t normally have an issue with bumping into his exes, but he wasn’t quite ready to run into Scott. When he’d broken it off a few months before, Scott hadn’t taken it well. That wasn’t to say Scott hadn’t been a gentleman about it. He just hadn’t seen it coming. And there was part of Oliver that worried he’d made a mistake. On paper, the man was perfect. A poster-boy for why everyone swooned over firemen. A real-life superhero. A nice guy with a nice smile and even nicer abs. But outside the bedroom, they had never really clicked. That had probably been Oliver’s fault. He wrapped the blanket round himself and tried not to watch the firefighters in case he inadvertently made eye contact with Smokey the Bear. “So…” A hedging Mina was never a good thing. “I called my mom and dad. They said we could stay with them.” “Your parents hate me.” And maybe he deserved it. “Did you actually tell them I’d be coming?” “Of course I did. And they don’t hate you.” Mia had always been a terrible liar. “Besides, who cares? We just need a place to stay for a day or two.” Their building groaned again, shifting, something inside crashing. They both knew it would be a lot longer than that. “I appreciate it.” And he did. Awkward or not, he needed some place to go. At the moment, without his wallet, he couldn’t come up with another option. Eventually it became clear there’d be nothing left to salvage, except, hopefully, the fireproof box Oliver kept in his closet. Assuming it could be found among the rubble once the entire mess cooled down enough to search. But he’d worry about all that later. For now, he’d be happy to have gotten out at all. The quiet hum of a car’s engine drew Oliver’s attention. Something black and expensive, with dark windows, slid up to the curb behind them. “I don’t want you to be mad at me.” Oliver’s eyes snapped to Mia. “What?” “That’s David picking us up.” “David?” Oliver worked to keep any emotion off his face and out of the tone of his voice. “You never mentioned your brother was back.” But of course he was back. David had been back in town for nearly three months. Oliver had known for weeks. “Yeah, sorry.” Mia made a face. “It’s just that, well, with how you two ended, I figured you wouldn’t want to know. Even if I didn’t know why.” “That was a long time ago. I was a kid.” But he hadn’t been. Not there at the end. “It’ll be nice to see if he’s outgrown being an asshole.” That made Mia laugh, and the sound of it helped Oliver relax. “Don’t hold your breath.” Oliver turned back to the car just in time to see the tall, dark-haired figure of David Elliston climb out of the driver’s seat. He’d only had a moment to prepare himself, and the sight of him—his first crush, his first kiss, his first everything—made Oliver’s pulse race and left him feeling slightly ill. “You’re both okay?” David looked back and forth between the two of them, holding Oliver’s gaze for a heartbeat too long, before focusing completely on his sister, who nodded, answering for them both. “Yes, thank God.” The sound of David’s voice had unearthed memories in Oliver that he wanted to keep buried, and he tried to focus his attention on Mia. “Think everything will fit in the car?” “We’ll make it work.” David stepped forward to grab the giant garbage bag off the ground, and Oliver would have let him if he hadn’t seen Scott crossing the yard, heading his direction. “I’ve got it.” He bent down and hefted it up into his arms again. David nodded, saying nothing, just moving to open the driver’s side back door for Oliver before going to grab his sister’s suitcase to throw in the trunk. Oliver forced the bag into the back and was around to the other side of the car when Mia called shotgun, saving him from any awkwardness of insisting he should sit in the back of the car with, what he guessed, was his best friend’s dirty clothes. She looked over, giving him a smile, and he knew she’d done it for him. Even if she didn’t really know the reason why. What Mia didn’t know about Oliver and David could have filled a book. * * * * Eleven Years Ago “The party’s downstairs.” Oliver jumped at the voice behind him and turned to find Mia’s older brother. “Huh?” “The party.” David tipped his chin down, indicating the floor below. “You’re Oliver, right? The party’s not up here, buddy.” “Oh. Yeah.” But Oliver had come upstairs to escape. “Do you mind if I hide up here for a few minutes?” The other boy stopped lacing up his combat boots to study Oliver, who hovered in his doorway. He wore a snug, red T-shirt and tight, black jeans, and just the sight of him made Oliver shake a little. “Have at it.” He pointed to the chair in the corner of his room by the window and went back to getting ready. “But I’m leaving in about five minutes.” “Where’re you going?” Oliver crossed the floor, carefully stepping over piles of books and dirty clothes, and dropped into the chair. “I gotta date.” David finished lacing up and stood to gather a few things, stopping to debate a bottle of cologne. “Is she pretty?” It was a stupid thing to ask. David was seventeen, a junior, and everyone in their entire school knew he was gay. Even a freshman like himself. It was just that part of Oliver craved to hear him talk about it, to hear someone talk about it in a voice that wasn’t a whisper. Like it wasn’t something to be ashamed of. David caught his eyes in the mirror above his dresser for a long moment before smiling. It made Oliver feel completely transparent. “He’s okay. Not as blond as you, but cute.” Oliver went completely pink. “Oh. Yeah.” He turned to look out the window, willing his heart to stop pounding. “I forgot.” The other boy said nothing, and after a few minutes, once he gained his composure, Oliver turned back, half expecting to find himself alone. But he wasn’t, David was still there standing at the foot of his bed, putting on a jacket. His hair was dark, nearly black. It was curly like Mia’s, but where on her it looked unkempt and crazy, on her brother it looked… Oliver’s pulse started to pound again. “How do I look?” David held up his arms and did a slow turn. “Hot?” “Yeah.” The word slipped out of Oliver’s mouth before he could think to stop it and David grinned wide. “You’ve got good taste.” When David stepped toward him, Oliver thought for a minute he was going to kiss him, but of course he didn’t. Instead, he unlatched the window, pushing it open wide, popped the screen, and stepped one long leg through the frame. “Close it behind me, but don’t lock it. Got it?” “Don’t lock it,” Oliver repeated. “But why are you going out that way?” David turned to look at him and smiled. He was closer now, so close that if he’d have chosen to kiss him then, in that moment, he could have. And Oliver would have let him. “Cause I’m f*****g grounded.” * * * * “You didn’t tell me about Oliver?” David stole a look in the rearview mirror. Oliver’s eyes were closed, his head back against the headrest, the rise and fall of his chest steady, and against his will it made David think of so many of their mornings together. He pulled his eyes away. “Do Mom and Dad know he’s coming?” “They’ve got all that extra room.” Mia sounded exhausted. Looked it too. And they both stank of smoke. “They won’t mind.” “They hate him.” Which was completely unfair. It hadn’t really been Oliver’s fault. It was David they should have been mad at. “They hate everybody.” Mia dropped her voice even lower. “But he doesn’t have anywhere else to go.” Didn’t he have a boyfriend? “Mia believes asking for forgiveness is easier than asking for permission.” Oliver spoke without opening his eyes. “I can’t imagine where she gets it.” David held back a sigh. “Sorry, I thought you were sleeping.” “I was, but I have to pee.” He opened his eyes, catching David watching him in the mirror. “How far is the new house?” Their parents had moved well outside of the city shortly after Mia’s first year of college. “God, I have to pee too.” Mia sat up straighter. “Pull over at the next gas station, something with a*****e. Maybe I can pick us up a couple of toothbrushes.” “You’re an angel.” Oliver reached out, tugging on one of Mia’s wild curls before crossing his arms over his chest and closing his eyes again. David caught the next exit, pulling off the highway and into the deserted parking lot of an all-night convenience store. He grabbed Mia’s shoulder before she could climb out of the car and handed her his credit card. “Thanks.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek. “You’re the best.” “I know.” He watched the pair make their way up the sidewalk and through the automatic doors, pressed close together. Anyone who saw them would have thought they were a cute couple. Mia, with her high-cheek bones and untamed dark curls, Oliver with his blond hair and his perfect face. David reached over to the glove compartment, searching, and finally pulled out a square pack of Tylenol that had been there for months. He popped the two pills, washing them down with a swallow from the tepid bottle of water that sat in his console, and rubbed at a spot between his brows. When David’d been asked to come back to Columbus and head the transition of The Kellmen Group’s newest magazine acquisition, of course he’d said yes. Taylor had no interest in leaving Atlanta, and when would David get another opportunity to advance into the role of executive-editor? Even for a little publication like Out? More than likely, never. David had connections here. He knew the city. Hell, he loved the city. And a years-old heartbreak would not dictate his decisions for the rest of his life. Still, the specter of the man had loomed over him since the day he’d made the decision to return home. And it wasn’t like he’d planned to avoid Oliver for the rest of his life. The exact opposite, if he’d had his way. And now that he’d been thrown together with him, even for just a ninety-minute road trip, he felt better. Like pulling off a bandage. It stung a little at first, but the pain would be soon forgotten. Oliver was still Mia’s best friend after all these years, and that wasn’t likely to change. So, David needed to mend fences. He knew as well as anyone, how easy it would be to ruin everything. One poorly chosen word and he might not be allowed in the same room as the man, never mind salvage anything resembling friendship. He needed his every move to be perfect. And yes, that may have sounded calculated. That’s because it was. David had learned a lot in Atlanta. The most important lesson being you didn’t leave your happiness up to luck, or to chance. And you didn’t leave it up to someone who hated you. Especially if they might have had every right to do so. He just needed to say the right things, and survive the next half an hour. And not let himself get sucked into Oliver’s orbit. It was something he’d never been very good at. * * * * Mia took her time browsing the aisles of the 7-Eleven, but eventually Oliver gave up, grabbed a fountain drink, and escaped. There was no way that hoodie was much help against the cold night air, and David automatically turned up the heat. “Sorry,” Oliver said, slipping back into the car, and pulling his hood down. “We might have to just leave your sister behind.” David didn’t laugh. “It was a joke. I was kidding.” “Listen.” David turned in the driver’s seat. In the light spilling from the store, it was his first real look at Oliver in years. Not a blurry glimpse of him on Mia’s social media page. Not some conjured memory when he was feeling lonely. This was the real thing. His cheeks were pink from the cold, his lips slightly chapped, and he was just as handsome as he’d always been. His shoulders were wider and his chest broader than at nineteen, and he’d even managed to grow into his ears a little. “Why don’t you both stay with me?” It had not been what he’d planned to say. “Huh?” David could see that Oliver was still blessed with the skill of clever repartee. “What?” “I’ve got the extra room.” David smiled, an attempt to disguise the shock at his own offer. Looking over, he saw Mia heading toward them, and he spoke a little quicker. “I work all day during the week, so you two would have the place to yourself most of the time. Our parents have retired.” Oliver grimaced. As optimistic as Mia’s chatter in the car had been that they’d be back in their building in a week or two, David knew they’d be lucky to be back in their apartments before spring, if at all. He suspected Oliver knew that as well. “Yeah, thanks, but I don’t—” David was relieved when the door opened up, interrupting Oliver mid-decline. Mia climbed noisily in with three plastic bags, nearly spilling her drink when she handed David back his credit card. “What are you guys talking about?” “You both staying with me,” David answered before Oliver had a chance to. “I have enough bedrooms. It’ll save you both from having to deal with our parents. And give everyone a more private place to make calls and work out all the details of the fire. Insurance?” “Oliver’s cell company,” Mia added. She was obviously on board with the idea. In fact, she was so quickly on board, David suspected it may have been her plan all along. He had the strangest desire to hug her. “He left his phone in the apartment.” “Yeah, definitely the cell company.” David nodded. “It’s going to be weeks, and you know there is no way in hell our mom and dad wouldn’t make you both miserable. Let alone allow you and Oliver to have your boyfriends over.” “He doesn’t have a boyfriend.” David heard Oliver thump the back of Mia’s chair, and turn to find his eyes suspicious slits. “Friends then.” David smiled and Oliver’s eyes narrowed even more, as if he suspected all of this was just an elaborate ploy to find out if he was seeing anyone. “I work a lot, so it’ll be like I’m not even there.” Oliver opened his mouth and David was certain it was going to be a polite but definite no. “And it will give you a quiet place to write.” David had turned, directing those words to Oliver alone, and Oliver closed his mouth. This time that angry glare was aimed solely at Mia. “Absolutely.” Mia was all smiles, and after a long, drawn-out moment, Oliver finally nodded his agreement.