The Doyennes' Worldly Convergence

Cordelia beep beep beep I was sitting at the kitchen table by the double glass doors, trying to read the news on my phone and enjoy my cup of coffee before my day began. beep beep beep But it doesn't sound like that's going to be happening any time soon. I closed my eyes and moaned as I took another sip of the warm, black nectar of the gods. beep beep beep I walked over to my roommate's bedroom door and flung it open. "Damn it, Harlee! Wake up and turn that awful sound off!" I yelled into the dark room. A groan escaped her mouth as she reached over, grabbed her cell phone, and turned off her alarm. "It's not my fault that it's the only sound that wakes me up in the morning." Thanks to the room being pitch black, she couldn't see me roll my eyes. "It doesn't even succeed at that. What it does do, however, is piss me off first thing in the morning, then I have to go and wake your miserable ass up." "Shut up. It's too early for your bullshit," Harlee grumbled as I heard her searching for something on her nightstand. "Don't worry, my little ray of sunshine, coffee awaits you!" I replied in a fake, cheerful tone. Harlee let out another groan, this time louder than the first one, just before she whipped a book at me. Luckily, I shut the bedroom door just in time, smiling at my minor victory as the book hit the door with a thud. I made my way back to the kitchen, topping off my cup of coffee with fresh hotness before I sat back down to finish reading the news. After a couple of minutes, Harlee dragged herself into the kitchen, her PJs clinging to her voluptuous body, brown hair a disaster, and glasses sitting a little crooked on her face. It's hard to believe this is the same woman that's my makeup artist at the news studio. "How can you stand to read that sh.it after talking about it everyday?" Harlee asked me as she poured herself a cup of coffee, or should I say half of a cup of coffee while the other half was creamer. "I don't know. How can you stand to drink that nasty fake flavored sh.it everyday?" Wrinkling her nose and squinting her hazel eyes in irritation, Harlee decided to drink her coffee instead of bickering with me. I shrugged my shoulders. "I just like to know what the competition is up to, that's all," I answered before taking a long sip from my own cup. A slight, sly grin formed on Harlee's face. "Uh huh, right. So, what's on the agenda for today again? Being that you only wear makeup for work, I kind of like having an idea before I start working on a blank canvas." I rolled my eyes. "Pfft. There's a bunch of interviews lined up with people who believe in conspiracy theories and crazy paranormal stories." "How do you know they're just theories and stories?" Harlee asked with an evil smirk. I tilted my head down and looked up at her as I paused with my coffee cup against my lips. Harlee rolled her eyes. "FINE! So, I'm assuming you want me to do your makeup and hair a little more on the sexy side today?" "No one is going to want to listen to the story, so I might as well give them something to look at, right?" I stuck my index finger down my throat and pretended to gag. "If you hate it so much, then quit," she said calmly, as if doing so was just that simple. Leaning back in my chair, I crossed my arms over my chest and stared quietly at my coffee cup, not really knowing what to say. -- "Well if it isn't my favorite redheaded anchorwoman and beautiful makeup artist! You both look nice this morning!" Allen's annoying voice called out with way too much perk as soon as Harlee and I exited the elevator onto our floor. "I'm your only makeup artist, Al ...." "And I'm your only ginger anchorwoman, so what do you want?" Seeing that Harlee and I weren't going to stop to talk to him, Al briskly walked over, stopping in front of us to physically make us come to a halt. Al was on the taller side and had dark brown hair, brown eyes, and an arrogant, spoiled brat attitude. But I guess having the business handed down to you from your parents and not actually having to work for anything in life would do that. Hell, his parents even still work at the studio to fix whatever he fu.cks up. Like the opportunistic asshole he is, Al constantly gave good stories to his buddies, while everyone else was stuck doing fluff or crap stories. Good looking? Maybe. But a good looking face with an averagely fit body and perfectly combed hair didn't make his crappy personality any more tolerable. "Well, Dee ..... word has it there's a bunch of others that have their own witnesses with evidence, so you're going on earlier than intended so we can at least be in line with them," Al smacked gum in his mouth, intensifying my desire to punch him. "How much earlier?" Harlee asked with a tinge of panic in her voice. Al's smile spread from ear to ear, knowing the reaction he was about to get. "You girls have 30 minutes." "Are you fu.cking shitting me?!" I tried to focus on not clenching my teeth so that I wouldn't break a tooth. Harlee grabbed my wrist and began dragging me to her makeup chair. "Come on Dee. Let's get to work. Luckily, you're naturally pretty and I just have to get you camera ready." "I'm so sick of this crap. As soon as there's the slightest hint of a hoax, conspiracy theory, or something is going on in a celebrity's life, it makes a spot in the news. God for fu.cking bid we worry about anything that actually matters and I get that story ...." Harlee was focusing on not stabbing me in the eyes while she applied my makeup. "Don't ask me why people prefer to focus on things that don't matter, Dee. I just put makeup on people. Clearly, I'm not one to psychoanalyze the human race." "CORDELIA!" Allen's loud voice echoed around us, making my body tense in irritation. Harlee did whatever last second touches she felt like she needed to do, and I ran up to the stage, sitting behind the fake desk. I really hate this job. I originally filled out an application wanting to be a journalist or even a reporter, but Al decided with a little bit of makeup I'd be better off as an anchorwoman. Sexist fu.cking ... "FIVE!" Al belted out, getting my attention as multiple sets of hands quietly continued the countdown of four, three, two, and the red light came on letting me know that I was live. "Good morning everyone! In case you're wondering, yes, it is two in the morning and I am Cordelia Craig, NOT Sophia Brace. I hope that you've had plenty of coffee, because you'll want to be awake for this. Monsters. The supernatural. Everything that we've read in fantasy books and watched in horror movies. Are they really just a figment of our imagination? Or is there a level of truth behind it all that's been buried deeply over time? This morning we have Mr Eugene Brown with us. Mr Brown, how are you doing this morning?" I know that the viewers now saw a split screen of Eugene and I. "It's just after two in the morning, how do you think I'm doing, Miss Craig?" I put on a fake smile as I continued on. "So you have a video clip that you'd like to share with us? Can you tell me a little bit about this video before we share it with our viewers?" "Well, I was in a town south of here and just left a gas station after taking a leak when I heard a noise like a crash or something. I could tell it was in the distance, but it was close enough to get my attention. I overheard a couple of old timers complaining about kids shooting exploding targets and what not, and how they're always doing crazy stuff in the country. Curiosity got the best of me because I had never even heard of exploding targets before. So, I got in my car and started driving towards where I thought the sound came from. Let me just say that the back roads suck, and thanks to the potholes and washboard roads, I ended up getting a flat tire. As I was changing it, which is really not as easy as they make it look on TV, I thought I heard yelling, so I started walking into the woods. The closer I got, the louder the yelling and screaming got, and then I saw a blue-haired chick and a guy go flying backwards." I tried to pretend to be interested in what Mr Coo-coo was saying. "They went flying backwards? Could you explain what you mean?" "I was looking up the dirt road and just like I said, they flew off of the ground, from some field, backwards, to the other side of the road where two other guys were standing. It was like something invisible back handed them or something." "They didn't just jump backwards?" "Yeah, sure. If humans can jump at least 30 feet from a standstill. I don't even know where they originally were, so it could have been even further. I got as close as I felt I could without getting caught ..." "Caught? By who?" I asked, interrupting his story. "Well, the wolves. The wolves and the people." "The wolves? You saw wolves? And they never noticed you?" There are no wolves in Pennsylvania, and if there were, they would have noticed him. "No, their attention was all focused on the field and that's when I saw a white wolf with wings come from the sky and then turn into a blonde chick before landing on the ground." "But you didn't get that part on camera?" Allen gave me a dirty look as I continued to question Mr Cray. "I didn't think about pulling out my cell phone until after that moment ...." "Right. How about we play what you were able to capture? I want to apologize to the viewers for the quality of the video you're about to see. Keep in mind that it was recorded on a cellphone and we zoomed in and cleared it up as much as possible, but there's only so much that could be done." The video was short and honestly horrible quality, but I watched in silence as bolts of electricity went from the blonde woman to an older woman. As the older woman lifted her hand, the bolts formed a large ball and hovered in the air before the video cut out. The famous bigfoot video was more clear .... what the fu.ck type of staged sh.it did I just show my viewers? "See?! See what I mean? Isn't that crazy?" Eugene's voice was excited, as if he just shared some big huge secret with the world. I wonder how much he got paid ..... I swallowed my spit before nodding my head. "And you actually saw the blonde landing on the ground, from the sky?" "I'm telling you she was a winged wolf and turned as she landed." "A winged wolf that turned into a human? Are you sure?" this guy has to be into some serious drugs. I can't believe that they put me on this story. I actually felt insulted ..... "I mean what I said! Have you ever watched those supernatural-type movies or TV shows? Just like that! Only she kept her clothes on." "Mr Brown, you seem to be disappointed with that fact?" Come on, douche bag .... give me one reason. Just one reason .... "Well, yeah. Did you see her? Who wouldn't want to see that naked! But don't get me wrong, I'd want to see you naked, too!" I looked up and saw the huge grin on Allen's face. A huge, arrogant, sexist grin .... "Do you think maybe I could get your number or something?" Eugene had the audacity to ask on live television. "Sure! How about I just pass it on to one of those werewolves that you saw and they can give it to you?" Suddenly the bright red light on the camera turned off, and I knew that Allen put up that stupid annoying technical difficulties screen. Allen's face was red with anger as he stomped towards the stage. "CORDELIA! Would it have killed you to be pleasant to the man?!" He was pissed off, but I really didn't care. I was over him and his parents acting like all of the women here had to be bubbly, chatty airheads that couldn't handle anything worth discussing. God forbid we have brains and want a little depth and excitement in our work life. "Al, if you wanted someone with better acting skills to talk to a sleaze bag, maybe you should have pulled Sophia out of your bed. I mean, the poor woman pretends you're a good lay ...." Gasps, whispers, amused snorts, and chuckles could be heard around us as Al's eyes widened and the veins could be seen on his forehead. "GET OUT! YOU'RE FIRED!" I oddly felt ... relieved. Like a huge ball of negativity was removed from my body. Or maybe it was just the piece of sh.it monkey named Allen missing from my back. I couldn't help but smile as I started walking towards the elevator. "And don't expect to get another job in this city! No one is going to hire you after this!" Allen belted out. I swear it sounded like he was going to cry. A single slow clap started as I pressed the down button and waited for the elevator door to open, and I knew exactly who it came from. "Keep it up, Harlynn! Makeup artists are a dime a dozen!" Al threatened my dear friend. I calmly walked into the elevator, pressed the ground floor button, and turned around to face everyone with my head held high. I might not be able to easily get another job, but at least I stood up for myself and what was right ....