Secret Existence

"Iliata"

"Alright, class, the next most powerful and treasured magnate we'll look at is one who was a smooth and soft-skinned beauty from the 14th century. She held the cure for loin and kidney ailments, was the creator of weaponry and other such instruments of such caliber, among a vast majority of powers she withheld in herself. Now, I want you to research this person and I will call on students spontaneously to report on this renowned figure in the next class. She was the beauty held in every man's eyes, the envy of females, to some a great source of acquiring wealth. Unfortunately, she was heavily guarded from civilians, only a few could feast their eyes upon her eye. That my budding historians is Queen Ilitia. However, she was betr- Oh my, before I get carried away, enjoy the rest of your day and see you next week. I hope you represent her majesty well." Mr. Heineman illustrious spoke and wrapped up.

My head was held down as I waited for the emerald glow to leave my eyes and veins. This is the second time, in public, since this has happened. I'd say whenever the name is called or I have a recollection of my former self's past, this would occur. Today is no different. I had to pull down my long sleeves and pull on my shade quickly.

Avoiding the calls from concerned voices and pats on my shoulder, I squeezed eyes shut hoping the flame would out quickly. Soon enough, silence befell the classroom as Mr. Heineman told me to close the door after leaving. I mustered the courage to get up and quickly took my shades off. I pulled out my mirror to make sure it was gone; and it was. A sigh was released from my mouth and my heels click-clacked out of the class.

Like always, I spent some time with my best friends then my drive came. At home, dinner went on with the excitable chatter of my family, including Jaeden and his new girlfriend, who had come to visit from college. Meanwhile, I just sat and listened; eating at my own pace.

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It's funny how time flies by pretty quickly. I could be doing a million and one things, or simply just breathing; existing, and I would not be aware of it. It's the end of the month and like always, my family and I would usually have dinner with the Valesquez's, and vice versa. Tonight, it's the Valesquez's turn to host us. That's definitely to my good fortune. Luckily, it's not always an uptight or body-restraining event. It depends on the occasion or the season in which we'd have it.

Prior to the event that shall not be spoken of, I'd be excited, or at least had high expectations of a great time. However, because of that day, I'm not sure how to feel. Why? Yup, ...maybe it's because of HIM. Don't get me wrong, we still find time to hang out or go on dates nights, but the dynamic between us has changed drastically. To me, it's rather unexplainable. It's like a kind of push and pull effect going on, and I must admit, I don't like it. Nevertheless, I can say I wholeheartedly still love Tyler but....I hate him now too.

Is this what Julli and Bryce went through in "Flipped"? Before I would boast, 'My Tybear and I have never and will never be like that'. Karma I suppose. Right? I'm worried because this is the first time this has ever befallen us, and now I'm struggling to understand myself.

What do I want, what should I do?

As I'm strapping up my black gladiator heels, I pondered on whether or not I should accept Tyler's offer of spending the weekend there. Honestly, I haven't done that in a long time and my heart is weighing pretty heavily on how I'm going face him in front of our families, much less to stay overnight.

"Jaedae, we're here." My second older brother's voice echoes in my head. Wow, this the longest I've ever zoned out. My heels cracked onto the dewy concreted pavement as I gazed upon the very familiar manor. The wind mischievously tickled my exposed sides, so I quickly pulled my formal yellow jacket on. If I had known, I wouldn't have worn such clothing.

The varnished, crimson red doors opened up and my brothers and I followed behind our parents while were escorted out to the back lawn. The butler greeted us warmly again and left. My sight came into view of a huge oakwood gazebo which was decorated with bright, luminescent bulbs. To save time, I politely and quickly greeted Mr. and Mrs. Valesquez along with their sons; sitting down at an empty spacing after.

Phew, no sign of Tyler around yet. Dinner wasn't served as yet, only water and the optional appetizer. In the meanwhile, I listened to the conversation the adults were having. Suddenly, I felt a pull on my jacket and I looked down to see the youngest Valesquez of six years, Talon.

"Oh hi, Tal. How's it going?" I pulled him up to my lap while smiling.

"Good, actually, why haven't you been here like always, Jae?" He peered up at me with curious eyes.

"Well, I've been busy Tal. You know teenage stuff."

"Oh. I miss playtime with you."

"I'm sorry. I promise I'll play next time."

"Say, ...why don't we play now?" He quizzed while twirling the curls at my waist.

"I'm not sure, maybe after dinner. Mommy won't be pleased if you get dirty so soon."

He pouts and after awhile nods in resenting agreement almost. I pulled his chin up and made funny faces so he could be happy. Works every time. I absolutely adore his high pitched giggles. Not long after grace, the food was being placed on the table by the maids. Mrs. Valesquez asked me to help Tal wash his hands, as a result.

As I was about to reenter the living room with Tal, Tyler appeared. He hugged me from behind pulling me closer toward him.

"Tyler please, uh...we need to go outside. Dinner has started."

"Don't worry we can always go later."

"Talon needs to go back-"

Before I could finish, Tyler called one of the butlers and asked them to bring Talon back to the gazebo. Talon looked back at us and I gave him the best smile I could conjure at the moment.

"What?" I whined.

"You look beautiful." He flirts and kisses my knuckles.

"I know." I blurted bashfully while trying to hide my blush.

He hugs me tightly; bringing us into the dark passageway. "You haven't been here in a long time. I miss you."

"It's only been two weeks, Tyler."

"Too long. So, have you accepted my proposal?"

"OH, have I? Mhmm, I don't know." I put on my thinking face while blinking at him.

Faster than the speed of light, we were whisping up the stairs and at the front of his room. I didn't question it I just stepped inside once he opened the door.

"Babe, are you still mad at me?"

"That's an understatement. Well...no, but-"

Everything went quiet as he waited for me to finish, however, I had no idea what I should say to him. So, I released an exasperated sigh and sat on his bed.

"Look, Tyler, I want to forget about it but you know, I can't help doubting our relationship when history coming knocking at our door once again!" I whisper yelled and stood up.

"I get your point and I'll forever be sorry to you. Notwithstanding, don't you ever doubt us. I love you and only you." He cups my face as I'd turned away to hide my tears.

I don't know where the confidence came from, but I found myself holding my lips into his for some time, them pulling away after he sucked on them. He thumbed my tears away and pulled my forehead close to his. My eyes soon closed for a brief second.

"I think we should head down before anyone gets suspicious. " I walked away.

Before I could open the door, I felt his muscular body crash into mine; holding me tightly. I felt a teardrop on my shoulder eight after.

"Please don't leave me. Say you'll spend the weekend with me. Please..."

I faced him upon contemplation and communicated a defeated "Fine" to him. He hugged me some more and I let him, I let him console me because he needed this...we both did.

"Okay, go wash your face, and let's go."

"It's so good to have you again, my Ilitia."

He happily kissed my forehead and went while I stood there fastened to the spot.