Back to You

B O N N I E "I think we should break up." His words slammed into my chest. My senses sharpen with adrenaline, and I hold my breath, straining to hear with every ounce of my concentration. It's cold outside and all I can hear is a low humming noise in my ear. I sense movement to my left and glance over to find Hayley, my nosy neighbor, who is watching us, completely enamored with our conversation. I glare at her, silently willing her to back off and go inside, but she doesn't make a move to leave. The street is quiet, but not quite silent. It's only early, maybe 7 pm, so I'm glad to be home alone right now. The last thing I need is for my mom to witness this. Cool air whispered around me, enveloping me whole, and I shiver. Skylar stares at me, frowning. Waiting for me to say something, anything, but I can't speak. I don't think I could even move right now if I wanted to. He was breaking up with me. All it took were those six words to shatter my heart. Six words to destroy all my plans and dreams for our future. I thought Skylar was the guy I would spend the rest of my life with. Instead, he's leaving me. Maybe planning out our future so far ahead of time wasn't such a good idea. But, I thought I got lucky in the boyfriend department and found my one a little earlier than others, but clearly, I was wrong. Wrong about so many things. How was I oblivious to it all? Oblivious to his feelings being so fleeting and now non-existent. I felt like we were a forever thing, but I guess not. Now, six hours later, I stand here alone. A sea of drunken college students surrounds me. They're dancing to the beat of something I can't even make out over the sounds and vibrations of the bass. Glancing around the room, I don't see a familiar face in sight. Well, besides my best friend and her boyfriend, which is probably a good thing. How else would I explain me being here alone? I'm not ready for that yet. The moral of this sad story, six, is now my least favorite number. I'm trying so hard to forget and drown out the pain, but nothing seems to work. I was never one for parties, especially right now, when I'm trying so hard to work through my heartbreak. I don't think it's even fully settled in yet what happened. I let my best friend, Olivia, convince me coming here was a fantastic idea. I knew then, and I know now that it was, in fact, a terrible idea. Seeing everyone loved up, swaying on the dance floor together in unison, is doing the opposite of helping me forget about him. All it does is remind me of the way I used to gaze up at him with the same lust-filled eyes as we danced to the beat of our own song. Last weekend, we did just that, right here in this very room. I sigh, wanting to punch myself in the chest for the painful reminder of how things were. I had no warning of what was to come. No signs that he was going to break up with me, and I think that's the worst part. As far as I was concerned, and I think everyone around us too, Skylar and I were the perfect couple. We were the couple that everyone was jealous of. Everyone dreamed of a relationship like ours, but I guess we all had it wrong. He didn't even give me a good reason, or any reason at all. "I'm just not feeling it anymore," were his exact words, like that explains anything. How does that even happen? You feel everything one day and then nothing the next? It's almost as bad as the total cliche break up line, 'it's not you, it's me.' "Can you please try to control yourselves around me?" I frown when I notice Olivia and Axel are now practically dry humping right next to me. Honestly, they're disgusting, and the public display of affection makes me want to gag. I can't judge though. Not even a week ago, I was that girl all loved up with her boyfriend, making out in the dark corner at one of Brad Kingsley's party. Now, I'm standing here awkwardly looking for anything in the room to focus on other than the soft moans I can hear escaping my best friend's mouth. Ugh. "Oh, Bonnie, don't be like that," Olivia teases, turning her attention away from Axel for a minute to face me. I peer over, and as expected, she has her typical I'm sorry, but not really pouty face on. I can't help but laugh; she knows that look never works on me. Axel doesn't tear his attention away from Liv for even a second. All his focus is on kissing her neck, the sounds of it making me physically sick. "You're welcome to join us, Bon. My offer still stands." Axel drawls, reminding me he is still there. Unfortunately, he's always there. I glance up to meet his gaze, and he is watching me with his standard, yet extremely ineffective, seductive stare. "That's never going to happen," I say, laughing, knowing that he was just teasing. Even if Axel irritates me most days, he isn't all bad. If you look past the fact, he can't help but flirt with everything that moves. Man or woman, he doesn't care, no one is safe. Apparently, that doesn't seem to bother Olivia, which surprised me a little. Okay, it surprised me more than a little. She's always been the jealous type. Not just over her boyfriends. She can't handle being second best to anyone in any situation, but for whatever reason, it's different with Axel. Olivia doesn't see the humor in his comments, though she never does. She spins around so fast to face him he stumbles back, almost losing his balance. The startled look on his face is comical. He should be used to her overdramatic antics by now. "How many times do I have to tell you to stop hitting on my best friend!" she screams, shoving him lightly in the chest. Axel chuckles at her, reaching out to pull her back into him. She doesn't resist and falls into his arms with a sickening smirk. "You know I'm only kidding, babe," he states, pressing soft kisses on her still pouty lips. Shaking my head at them, I zone out, glancing around the room again. Desperately trying to find Scott so I can get the hell out of here. The longer I search for him, the more time I have to think, and I realize I haven't seen Scott once since we arrived at the party. This isn't surprising. He rarely hangs around us, especially when Axel is around. "Have you seen Scott anywhere?" I question to no one in particular. I turn back to see if either of the love birds heard me, but they are back to making out. "Nope, haven't seen him since we got here," Olivia mumbles, trying to get her words out with Axel's mouth still glued to hers. I guess she was listening to me after all. Talking to these two will not get me anywhere. It looks like I'll have to find Scott on my own. I walk off, dreading pushing my way through the crowd ahead. "Wait!" Olivia screams out to me. I turn back to see her waving at me before she turns to face Axel. "Babe, give me a minute with Bon," she says, caressing him lightly on his chest while batting her eyelashes up at him. He winks before walking off into the crowd filling the makeshift dance floor. No arguments on his part. Olivia strides over to me, her long legs not needing many steps to close the distance between us. "Where are you going?" she questions, crossing her arms, doing her best interrogation pose. "I need to find Scott; I can't be here any longer." "Bullshit, you can't leave yet." she reaches out, grabbing my arms and holding me tightly. "You need to stay; this is a good distraction for you right now. Trust me." I know she's only trying to help, but this party isn't what I need, at least not right now. What I need is to be home in my warm, cloud-like soft bed reading a good book. Add ice cream into that mix, and it's perfect. "I can't stay Liv; this isn't helping me forget anything." The look in her eyes lets me know she understands, even if she doesn't agree. "Okay, fine, but I need you to do one thing for me before you go." I don't like where this is going. The knowing smirk on her face scares the s**t out of me. "What?" I stammer, dreading the answer. "See that guy over there? The one with his back to us," she nods in the direction over my shoulder. I glance back to see a tall blonde guy wearing a leather jacket. I trail my eyes down his body, and my eyes land on one of his hands. The veins, a big giveaway that he is, without a doubt, hot. I turn back to Olivia, trying my best to hide the light flush spreading up from my chest and onto my cheeks."What about him?" I question her eyes brighten, and a huge grin spreads across her face. I knew this would not be good. "I want you to kiss him." I step back from her, startled by her challenge. I feel my cheeks heating, the flush taking me over now. "You want me to do what?" I clench my jaw and stare at her with wide eyes. There is no freaking way I am going to do that. "I want you to kiss him; you need this. It's the start you need to move on." She says this so casually, as if it's a normal thing to go around kissing strangers at parties. I suppose for some people it is, but not for me. This is something I would never do. "I'm not kissing him, Liv; I don't even know who he is!" "You can do this; trust me. Plus, he looks cute from behind," she lightly shoves me in his direction with a parting wink. I sigh, knowing there is no arguing with her. Sucking in a deep breath, needing it to get this over and done with, I close my eyes and compose myself. It's not like I haven't done something like this before, just not in a very long time. The first time I met Skylar was when we played spin the bottle. It was also my first kiss. I never told him that, though. I wanted to give off the illusion of being cool and experienced, but I think from my fumbling hands and inexperienced lips, he knew. Although, he never asked me about it. I turn around and stare at this guy's back. Even looking at him is making my heart hammer in my chest. What if he pushes me away? That would be so embarrassing, but I couldn't really blame him. Who wants a random girl coming up and kissing them? I look back at Olivia. She is beaming at me, giving me a thumbs-up, and nodding at the stranger again. I roll my eyes at her before spinning around and making my way towards him. Pushing through the crowd, I keep going until I am standing mere inches from his back, which now that I am closer, he seems a lot taller. I cough lightly, hoping this would get his attention, but no luck. I'm going to have to do this the hard way, grow some lady balls, and just do it. I reach up, tapping on his shoulder. He spins to face me, but before our eyes connect, I panic and squeeze my eyes shut. I hear a soft chuckle come from the guy standing in front of me, so at least I've got his attention. Keeping my eyes closed, I blurt out a confession like word vomit. "Look, I've been dared to kiss you. If you don't want to, I understand." I rush out the words so fast, I doubt he can fully comprehend what I'm saying. I wait for a response, but he never speaks. His answer comes when I feel his lips gently press against mine. The sudden feel of his lips against mine shocks me for a second before I reach up, grabbing either side of his face, pulling him to me, getting as close as I can to him. At first, our kiss is soft, barely a touch, but after a second or two, his lips move in sync with mine. His kisses become more hurried and intense. His hands move around, gripping onto my lower back, pulling my body into his. The shock of how firm his body was surprised me for a second, but I stopped myself from pulling away. He lets outs out a low groan and my response is to gasp in between his lips and mine. I have never been kissed like this. Not even with Skylar. This kiss is breathing a new life into me, literally. After what feels like a lifetime, I pull back, slowly drifting my eyes up to meet his. My eyes lock on his blue-gray eyes. Thick, dark lashes frame them, and I know from the slight lift of them in the corners that he is smirking at me. The blood drains from my body, and I feel myself trembling in his hold, but he doesn't let me go. Instead, he leans down, closing the distance between us before whispering in my ear. "Miss me that much, did you, Bonbon?"