The First Time

Chapter 15

Chapter 15

     Yes, s*x for academic excellence. It does not matter if the boyfriend is nothing but an academic zombie.

     Other girls though cherish the company of a male for the fun of it. Evidently, there was going to be financial and academic gain from such a relationship. Quite a symbiotic relationship.

     Oge’s case was not different from the above. In Kelvin’s own analysis, she needed a boyfriend desperately. She was shy with her effort that she soon lost the race-for-Kristor to another girl Helen. Helen actually was the one that held on despite all odds.

     Oge, Kelvin observed could not understand why some of her fellow girls were competitively going out for Kristor. She could not just bear the heat of the competition. She withdrew from the rat race when she came to terms with the fact that Kristor was not easy for her to get on a platter of gold. She just could not stress herself to give it a fight.

     Helen herself was a different kind of girl who Kelvin's investigation revealed had lived a tough-like life with some boys in her early life. She had a heart that could withstand whatever it takes to win Kristor over.

     Kristor never wanted anything to do with the hordes of girls after him. He could not help being nice to them as much as he could. To him, he just could not bear to break anyone’s heart. He was confused. He could not find a way out of the dilemma. He was like a trapped animal reluctant to break free if he can.

     “Kelvin, I don’t know how to hurt someone’s feelings. But still, I knew too well...I can’t find a place in my heart for these girls, not Helen either,” he confided in Kelvin one evening while they were having their dinner.

     “What do you want me to do? You had been creating the room for them,”

     “Haba! How do you mean? Are you saying I shouldn’t help them when they ask me to?”

     “Not really. After all, they ask me for help most times too. All I am saying is that you shouldn’t always be…. I mean…. well? Tell them to point clear, that you are not interested beyond the academic program and sit on that,”

     "I’d succeeded with the rest but this girl Helen. She just wouldn’t take no for an answer. She’s aggressive and I’d done everything to put her off still… gush!”

     “Still what?”

     “You knew too well how she got me. When she learned about my financial problem through that wide-mouthed Mekus. You knew Mekus can’t get his mouth shut just for a minute once he learned about anything about anyone! She surprised me by giving me the money and for some time now I had been depending on her somehow though I was reluctant at the onset men, I had no option!” he paused.

     “You knew that she too depends on me for all that she does in the school; her studies. I’d turned into her thinking brain...we kind of swapped roles. She somehow supports me financially and I’d to make sure she scales through with her studies,”

     “Kind of trade, ugh? You’ve eaten the Adam’s apple. Look, I just can’t understand the two of you well. The music you wanted playing is what you're dancing to,”

     “That’s it, Kelvin. All these got started out of my self-pity for her when I realized she was having it rough with her studies. I’d just wanted to brush her up you know with the basics of mathematics and her core courses,”

     “Yes, with the basics of math…. are you regretting it then?”

     “Of course not?” 

     “Then why the blabla?”

     “Kelvin, I’d involved myself with her that I can’t get myself easily out without breaking her heart?”

     “How do you mean?...You're attracted to her then,”

     “Yes. She wants us to become lovers. Could you imagine she tells me all-I-need-to know about her body even the ones am not supposed to know,”

     “Say, it out and clear. You are in love with her. You two have been too close. She’d finally won you over because she now affects you like no other person,”

     “You don’t seem to understand it all. I am going to hurt her more than that later. Thtas my fear,”

     “Then what stops you from breaking up now to save the inevitable unhappiness of the future? Why continuing in an unhappy relationship out of fear?”

     “Do you think it’s easy? Yes, it’s easier said than done,”

     “C’mon, it’s better to hurt now and early too than to postpone it to the future when it would hurt even the more. Why don’t you minimize your closeness with her and a kind of make her do some of her home works all by herself than carrying the burden alone? You aren’t really helping her in that aspect. You know that,”

     Kristor deployed every tactic he could easily lay his hand on. He was half-hearted in his effort to end the relationship. He met with little or no success. He started feigning been overworked from his own load of school assignments to avoiding anything to do with her. It seemed, the more he tends to avoid her the more the cord of the relationship gets tied tighter. She began using subtle means to break his formidable line of defenses―she just wants him no matter what it takes. The whole thing got to a point that he on several occasions threatened to beat her up if she dares to disturb him again.

     “Kelvin, this girl is stubborn. She won’t leave me for good!” he almost screamed at him one afternoon as they strolled back home.

     “I just see her winning after all,” 

     “How do you mean?”

     “She understands you more than you could ever think. She knows your soft spot. She knows how to keel on your ship of defence to water it down as easy as  watermelon. The two of you are simply a funny couple,”

     “You better stop it!”

     “No, I am not trying to hurt you. Can’t you see how she reacts whenever you get angry with her? She’ll calm down and wait patiently until the right moment when the steam of your annoyance has gone down. Then she would come petting you softly. You just don’t seem to scare her anymore. Instead, you’d made yourself vulnerable to her softness and that’s her real power over you,”

     “If that’s a love poison, she’d failed. I am the great Abana! No woman can cower me,”

     “That’s exactly where your weakness lies. Because behind that boast lies your weakest point of which she’d contaminated with her softness,”

     Kristor looked at Kelvin with some puzzled expressions written over his face. Slipping his right hand into his blue jean pocket, he became silent. He was seriously contemplating what Kelvin had just said. He knew it was the truth. He was at a crossroads and beaten out.

     “Kelvin, I can’t understand your position. Are you simply encouraging me or what? Tell me for God’s sake, please,”

     “Never part of it. I actually never knew how the two of you began it all. I would neither rush nor hold you back. Sincerely speaking, I’ve nothing against her or to you. You can stand tall to it or bow out. I’m only airing my innocent views because you called for it. You’re old enough to know what you want out of it all..." he paused to consider Kristor.

     "What’s that? Say it out,"

     "If I am permitted to be honest with you...I think you want the relationship more than you pretend to loath it,”

     The relationship really lasted more than Kristor could have imagined. He puts on a false screen which makes it look like he was only in it out of pity or precisely out of an I-can’t-help-it. He was of the thought that his relationship with Kelvin will be ruined with the entrance of a third party, a female. It soon became a formal knowledge that the two are on good terms. Most of the other girls quickly withdrew reluctantly out of the race. Kelvin watched as their usual patronage all trickled out.

     Because Helen would not take no for an answer, she had to bear the emotional brunt of the unbalanced relationship at the onset. She had to put forth more effort than necessary to keep the relationship going. It was like she was the only one who needed the relationship more than their natural and mutual consent. She could not afford to lose out either. Her determination was to make it through to the main campus. It could only be possible if she soaks all the heat. That was going to be her sacrifice. Then she could not help but end up having to be a complaint always.

     “I just can’t imagine the kind of person Kristor is. He just wouldn’t allow me a space in his heart,” she had complained one day. “Kristor doesn’t like to take a walk with me. Maybe he’s ashamed of me,”

These became a constant posture as time went by.

     “I’d done enough to make him happy and yet he wouldn’t allow himself to be pacified by me! Just don’t know what else to do for him,” she lamented.

     “Oga Kelvin, this friend of yours, something must be wrong with him. He simply hates me,” she would complain bitterly to Kelvin or most times to whomever that cares to hear her out.

     Kristor on his own part was not happy with her complaints. He was really pissed off by her inability to accept no for an answer or live with the choice she had made to force herself on him.

     “Did I force you? If you aren’t happy then let me be! I’d told you time without number that I am the great Abana. I am not that easy for you or any other woman,” Kristor was heard telling her or anyone that cares to hear his own version of the story.