You Don't Deserve My Tears

CHRISTABEL’S POV ‘'Christabel, you are not Alice. No matter where you travel to, you will always be bland and unattractive.’’ ‘’Why do you want to force yourself in places you don’t fit in?’’ Gilbert’s voice carried no emotion as he turned down my suggestion. Sad and confused, I said, ‘’it’s our twentieth anniversary. I just want to experience something different. You said I am bland and unattractive, maybe if I traveled...’’ ‘’Vacations are not for everyone, no matter the reason.’’ Gilbert cut me short. My blood pressure dropped. I couldn’t believe it. My heart beat heavily as I replayed the words that Gilbert spoke. ‘’Who’s going on a vacation? Count me in!’’ Joseph, my grandson, ran into the living room excitedly. When he saw me with Gilbert, he stopped, and his excitement disappeared. ‘’Grandma Christy, you want to go on a vacation?’’ Joseph started laughing. ‘’Grandma Christy, you look like a maid, they won’t allow you to enter the Aero plane. Do maids join aero planes?’’ Joseph’s words cut deeply into my heart. ‘’If it were Grandma Alice, they would welcome her at the airport because she is so beautiful, and her hair is so long and smells nice.’’ ‘’But you, Grandma Christy,’’ Joseph said, laughed, and shook his head. ‘’You smell like morning breath all the time.’’ He squealed and ran back into his room. I flinched in shock at the audacity of Joseph. Gilbert could not believe what Joseph said, but he hid his surprise from me. I looked down at my feet in shame. My nails had not been done since God knows when. My feet looked as if I had just stepped out of a forest. My hands were veined from all the work I had to do constantly for everyone. However, later that day, I served dinner. My husband Gilbert, my son Graham, and my grandson Joseph were all at the table feasting on the delicious meal I made while disregarding my existence. ‘’Mom, this food is nice. But you know I hate onions. Next time don’t put it in my food,’’ Graham complained impatiently. ‘’And why has my tea gone warm?’’ Gilbert carelessly knocked the mug over, causing tea to spill on me while the mug shattered to pieces. I yelped. The tea was hot, piping hot and it burnt my skin. ‘’Come on, don’t overreact, the tea is not even hot. Just wipe yourself and get me another one.’’ Gilbert clearly saw that apart from the fact that I was burnt from the tea, I was also bleeding from the piece of ceramic that had cut my skin. I wobbled back on my feet as I got up. I was inside the kitchen making another tea for Gilbert when I heard the living room suddenly come alive. ‘’Aunty Alice!’’ ‘’Grandma Alice!’’ My sister Alice entered the living room, and my son and grandson were excited. I entered the living room through the kitchen to sweep the glass that had shattered on the floor and saw Gilbert grinning from ear to ear at the sight of Alice. The excitement and affection I saw in Gilbert’s eyes, I had never experienced it with him before. Joseph hugged Alice as if she was his mother. ‘’Guess what guys, we are going on a trip to Los Angeles for Mayfair. Everyone, pack your bags.’’ The living room exploded with happy cheers when Alice made that announcement. ‘’The Mayfair! I can’t wait. I will tell my friends at school that I attended Mayfair.’’ Joseph nearly cried of happiness as he hugged Alice with all the love his little heart could garner. ‘’My wife and I could do with a vacation since our honeymoon was so short. Aunty Alice, what would I do without you?’’ Graham sang his aunt’s praises. ‘’Alice, you are always so hardworking and thoughtful. I admire you every day.’’ Gilbert got up to hug Alice while I stood at a corner watching them. I watched everyone express their love for my sister, while I stood there, invisible. ‘’Christy, you are going to come with us, right?’’ Alice eventually noticed me and asked. As soon as she asked me that question, the excitement in the room disappeared. Everyone exchanged nervous glances at each other. Gilbert cleared his throat and said, ‘’Christabel’s duty is to take care of us and the house. If we all go to Los Angeles, who would take care of the house?’’ ‘’Yes, mom should stay back and take care of the house. There’s a lot that goes on in Los Angeles, and she is not just cut out for it.’’ Graham gave his two cents in support of his father. They had said it all. There was no need for me to reply to Alice anymore. I was not going to Los Angeles with them because I only existed to take care of them and run errands for them. Indeed, like my grandson said, I was just a maid. ‘’Well, if you want to be involved in the trip, maybe you should help everyone pack. Right, Christy?’’ Alice brought up a suggestion she considered the best for me. ‘’It is a way to feel involved in something that you are not qualified to be a part of.’’ I could clearly hear the mockery behind Alice's tone. Her choice of words was targeted to make me feel bad and inferior. I opened my mouth to say something, but shock held back the words. ‘’You are always so thoughtful, Alice. That is where Christy comes in. Her expertise in taking care of us is top-notch.’’ Gilbert gave Alice a high-five for her suggestion. ‘’Now that we have everyone in their place, maybe we should go out to celebrate,’’ he added. ‘’I feel like going out. I don’t want Grandma Christy’s bland food anymore.’’ Joseph pushed his meal away; he had barely touched it. ‘’It’s true, the food has gone cold and sour. I’m not eating again.’’ Gilbert scraped back his chair and got up. ‘’Well, I have tickets to attend the tennis game today. Who’s coming?’’