Me and the Forgotten

It all started at 6 am on a Sunday. there I am walking to work at a last minute gig. My name is Jaiden James DaSilva I’m 6”0 tall, long curly hair with the muscular build similar to a swimmer body just more defined.My golden Carmel coffee skin is my biggest asset. I’m 25 /26 in August that is 6 months away. I’m a Singer in shitty pubs and clubs, I’m saving so I can buy my venue to perform my own song at. that’s why I’m accepting this back ally 24/7 club. One of them under the radar clubs that the police make out don’t exist. Don’t get me wrong I’m happy for the money but I despise this club. Most of the creeps that go to this hell hole all think there untouchable and above us mere humans. ** HaaaH if only I knew then how true that comment was ** Mr Steve the owner, A fat greasy rat of a man calls me to his office once he see me walking in. Mr Steve is as crooked as they come everyone knows he scum But he is scum with a lot of money and power, otherwise untouchable. Believe me I would snap his greasy fat neck if I had somewhere to escape to. I would be doing the world a great service eradicating that piece of s**t. Once in his office he proceeds with trying to intimidate by calling in his goons. ** HaaH don’t worry you filthy rat your time to die hasn’t come yet ** I think to my self. Once he feels safe he proceeds in telling me i’m late and I’ll be docked half hours pay out my wages for the day. I left without a fuss And head straight to the lounge bar, where I’ll be singing till the next shift rotation at 5 pm. Halfway through the day Gary the bar man walk over with some warm water with lemon and a little honey. “Hey man how’s your voice holding up?” Gary asks me. I’ve know Gary for about 2 years since I’ve been takings gigs here at the 24/7 club. Gary is 5”10 blond shaven head very big and muscled body with a few scars ups his otherwise perfect tanned olive skin. “Ahhhh thanks I needed this your a angel I swear” I say as I grab and sip the water. “I don’t think I will make it to 5 pm if they keep requesting power ballads ” I sigh in frustration. “Who would request power ballads in a 24/7 club” I say with giving up the will to live. “ Haaahaaa” Gary boomed our as he continued “awww poor pup, you know the lounge bar is for guest who like a slower pace” he say in a Duh voice “Also you love to sing diva songs, Especially! Power ballads ” he laughs while patting my back with his rough hands. Ahhhhh f**k my life yes I do love belting out a diva song now and then but this is a joke. 5 pm finally arrives and some girl with brown average length hair with average black jeans and black top on arrives to replace me. I give her the warning that it’s all power ballads requested, grab my jacket and bag turn to leave. I never say bye to anyone only Gary if I see him on my way out, so when I feel someone from behind me grab my shoulder and say. “Your going to leave without saying goodbye ” shocked is the only word that comes to mind till something I didn’t understand happened a yearning for this strangers touch. Anger slowly start to replace shock and yearning as I remove the silky soft hand that had a strong grip on my shoulder. “Remove your filthy hand from Me!” I Seethe thought clenched teeth. I dare not move a inch as I don’t think I can hold back from killing this person. ** ok I have anger problem. I take meds but sometimes there not enough*** I felt the person hand disappear from my shoulder and for a split second I was cold and alone and sad, till my senses returned with the rage and confusion as I stormed out of there. At the door Gary ran up to me saying I had forgotten my tips, I thanked him and started my lonely walk home before he could ask me any questions about what just happened. The whole walk home I couldn’t understand why this stranger made me so angry just for touching my shoulder? he felt I owed him a good bye ? Why? I never speak to anyone other than Gary if I have the choice. Maybe he liked me? But that’s not how you approach people? Well maybe it is and I’m so out of touch hahahaha. But that don’t explain my anger. The walk home and even while I bathed and ate and now while I lay here in bed I couldn’t answer my own questions. **Why was I so affected by his soft hand?? Was I really angry or scared ?? Scared of what?? ** I haven’t been truly scared since a child. Ahhh too frustrated I decided to call it quits and count sheep to stop my overthinking. The next morning I roll around in bed still asking my self these same questions? Why couldn’t I get over it? “Honesty what’s my problem”? I say out load voicing my thoughts. “He only touches my shoulder and asked why I’m leaving without saying goodbye? And what was that other feeling?” Why am I still going over this? am I just a f**k up carzy mess. is there something else that I can’t put my finger on. “Ahhhhhhh” I scream deciding to give up and take a shower. After the steam from the shower has cleared my head i get out to dry off.while I check my phone to see missed calls from my mother and farther. Deciding to ignore the missed call till later I call my therapist. Jackie was a lovely woman who I always felt cared for me deeply and wanted the best for me. She is actually the only person I trust not Jude me when I tell her my dark thoughts and weird urges. Jackie answer on the third ring “Hello Jaiden, how are you this beautiful morning? What do I own the pleasure of this call from you on a early Monday morning? Jackie cheerfully asks. “I need some new meds” i state flatly “ I’ll be at your office for 10 am I will bring coffee” i say and put the phone down before she can refuse. I know it’s rude but jackie knows my behaviours and habits for some years now. I’ve been seeing her since 18. But I will still apologise to her and genuinely mean it. After I brush my teeth and get dressed for the day in all black. My favourite colour for clothes. I decided to call my mom back I can’t handle my farther today, I think he would tip me over the edge. My mother who’s name is Valerie April (Whitemoon) now DaSilva is 52 but look genuinely 30 is 5”7 with amazingly aluminous olive skin and deep brown eyes that I inherited. He blond highlighted hair reaches just between her shoulder blades. My mom is outstandingly beautiful inside and out she truly a goddess on this earth that loves me and my sister. She just wants our happiness overall. Even if that means her over stepping sometimes. You see my mother come from a strong unbroken family Lineage that dates back to this city’s founders. We live is west lake city: home to 1,000,000 souls, the West Lake City broad/ council has to have a member of my mothers and farther family as a active sitting member. My farther James A DaSilva 55 years old but looks 35 is a 6”2 solid muscle man. His dark chocolate skin that look so rich and vibrant amazes me. His perfectly chilled face and body would make any man jealous. The DaSilva family also dates make to the founding of this city. Tho not as old as my mother’s family they are just as strong. Both my parents wanted me to take there place on the city bord and council when I turned 18. I refused the position till I turn 20, then when I was willing my farther refused saying I would embarrass and ridicule the family name if I was to take over. Out of no where he announced this may I add. That my only sibling will be taking he’s seat for me. I was ok with that my sister is the most amazing person I know. “Hello mom, how are you? Yes I have missed you too” I say to my mother as she complains about my lack of contact I’ve made this past month. “Jaiden I know you and your father don’t see eye to eye!” That’s one way to put it I say to my self as she carries on. “But I’m your mother! Why do you choose to hurt me by disappearing from the face of the earth” she sobs dramatically. “I’m sorry Mom I’ve been busy with gigs and saving“ I say. “ Saving? Saving for what exactly? Why would you ever need to save”? She say to me totally confused. My family have money a lot of money but I would rather earn my own so my farther has no say. “Mom you know I only use the family bank card for essentials like rent and food” I say with a frustration dripping into my voice. My mother knows that my farther opinion still affects me greatly. I hate to judge on how I choose to spend the money, basically how I choose to live. She knows I hate spending the family’s money for that reason. “Hahahaha are you a total fool oh my beautiful silly boy” she chockes out between sobs of laughter. “That money is ancestral money and mostly from my side, your father could never amount anything remarkably close to the fortune we own” she say while trying to catch her breath. “You have just as much right if not more my beautiful son because your my son. I love your farther more than I could explain but you and your sister are my world! ” She empathised the word world. “I will not have you scrounge and beg for pennies because your worried about what your farther thinks” she states I just agree and tell her I’m late for therapy. It’s easier to agree sometimes with mother. “Why do you insist on still going to therapy I told you it can only help you so far you need your farther for the rest? Mother says cryptically “Because mom I’m a total mess with rage issues and trust issues that need fixing and what can dad do that he the problem ” I say getting pissed “ Bye mother love you talk to you later” and then I put the phone down before she can totally ruin my day trying to fix mine and dad relationship. Once dressed and ready I decided it’s time to face the day. Time to see Jackie.