Escha Rose

Out of Control

ESCHA ROSE POINT OF VIEW

I sigh again as i gaze over Lacey one more time. The nurse came in 15 minutes ago at 6:30 telling me that i was welcome to go to school and come back later. of course i refused but they insisted and told me that i wouldn't get into trouble. so i agreed.

I kiss Lacey's forehead and tell her i will be back later, even though i know she can't hear me. "I love you Lace.." i say and walk out of her room and out of the hospital altogether. When i get home i headed upstairs to clean Lacey's room. I pick up all the broken and cut up pictures then clean the blood. Seeing all of it makes me mad all over again.

I walk into my room,angry, and punch my bed over and over again. I can't afford to break anymore walls.

~LATER

When i get to school i'm pretty sure that i look deadly as heck. I can tell how scared they are because every time someone gets in front of me they hurry and get out the way and they don't look in my eyes.

I walk into my first period and i sit in the back, where i sat yesterday after Ava walked in. i put my head down and put my hood on. 

I'm still upset. It just makes my blood boil. Why would Lacey do that? What if she would have died? I know i can't live without her, she saved my life. She has so much to live for.. It makes me sad at the same time. because i know what it feels like to be lied to. I found out my dad killed my mom when i was 8.

The bell rings and someone sits down to the right of me, but i don't look up. They tap my shoulder but i don't move. They tap me again and i become more irritated. They stop after i began to shake in my seat. I am left alone for a couple of minutes when someone taps my shoulder again, this time harder. "WHAT?!" i shout pulling my head up. It's not Ava this time... it was Ms. Wonder, my teacher. I still look at her looking at me. "WHAT?!" i repeat again. She doesn't say anything for a second, and she shakes her head. "I just need you to pull your hood off and put your head up." she says looking at me like i am an animal.

she walks back up to the front and i put my head back down. I don't care today. I need to get out of here. 

I'm thinking about walking out when i hear something hitting my desk with extreme force followed by Ms. Wonder yelling--no screaming-- at me "ESCHA ROSE I TOLD YOU TO PUT YOUR HEAD UP AND TO TAKE YOUR HOOD OFF" . I raise my head and look at what she hit my desk with. I need to calm down, i am getting way to mad for me to be in a room with other people at the moment. 

I get up and grab my bag off of the floor. when i turn back to get my keys off of my chair i meet Ava's eyes. She looks almost afraid. Not of me, but of what i might do. I turn back around and push past Ms.Wonder and walk to the front of the class and to the door. When my hand hit the door nob i hear Ms. Wonder coming after me. I pull the door open very calm and i walk out of class. "GET BACK HERE YOUNG WOMAN! YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO WALK OFF OF  CAMPUS! THIS IS WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS GENERATION! YOU ARE ALL A BUNCH OF STUCK UP, DUMB, IDIOTS WHO DON'T KNOW HOW TO RESPECT YOUR ELDERS OR CARE FOR THEIR FEELINGS!" I stop in my tracks. I turn around and i see more and more students and teachers coming out of their class rooms.

i walk up to Ms. Wonder and i yell back at her "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT! I AM NOT AN i***t CHECK! I HAVE A 4.3 GPA AND I HAVE BEEN HOME SCHOOLED MOST OF MY LIFE. SO DON'T TALK ABOUT UNGRATEFUL. I DO WHAT I WANT AND YOU WILL NOT STOP ME. YOU YELL AT ME AGAIN I WILL LOSE MY COOL AND THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU WANT TO SEE." I breathe heavily looking at her while she looks shell shocked. I know i must be a sight to see. I know that my skin is red from anger and my eyes are watery. 

I turn back around to walk out of the front of the school when i see the principal. He just looks at me and lets me by. Before i get out of the door i hear him whisper to me "i know what has happened you are excused" and then he turns around a yells for all of the teachers and students to go back to class and that he would like to see Ms. Wonder in his office.

I walk to my car, get in and pull off to Kate's house. Time that i pay her a visit.

I know i'm speeding, even without looking at my dashboard, i know im going like 30 over the speed limit. when i reach Kate's house i turn my car off and get out. Her car is in the drive way so i know that she is home. I knock on her door. 

no answer. So now i'm banging. The door opens a minute later and i expect to see Kate. What i didn't expect to see was another girl in a bath robe with love bites all over her skin. "Who are you" she asks.

"who are you?" i retaliate

"Im Kate's girlfriend, have been for 6 months." she says smiling.. but her smile falters at the darkening look on my face. "w-what?' i say not wanting to believe that she has been cheating on Lacey for half a year.

"yeah.. is something wrong?" she asks looking worried. 

I stay quiet for a minute and then i push past her and run up the stairs towards Kate's room.  When i get there i see Kate sitting on the bed in a sports bra and some gym shorts for men. When she sees me i fear cross her face and she stands with her hands out. "R-rose , i can explain." she says when i start walking towards her. 

'the only thing that is going to be explained is her death' is what i think to myself before jumping on her and punching her over and over in the face.  "you cheated on my sister. She almost died" i say still punching her in her face. When i feel like she has had enough i get up. She sits there for a minute. then she rises and sits on her bed. there is blood all over her face, im quite sure that there is some on my knuckles as well.

"she trusted you Kate and you go and do some stupid s**t like this?" i ask walking back and forth. "Y'know, she was talking about marrying you one day. And i told her to go for it! and you do some wack s**t like this!" i yell pulling at my hair. "Kate. WHY? WHY DO THIS? SHE LOVED YOU AND YOU KNOW THAT." I yell walking up close to her. she falls back trying to get away from me. I grab her by the straps of her bra and pull her up to see me. 

"I'm going to always protect my sister. If my sister dies i will kill you, and you know i never go back on my word. So believe me when i say this: stay the hell away from my sister or i will make your life a living hell  and beat you without mercy. I didn't hurt you as much as i wanted today. But that doesn't mean i won't."  i stop and take a breath. "You look at her again or even think of her while I'm around and you will regret it" i spit out and drop her back on the bed and walk back down the stairs. I walk out of the house and get back in my car and i head to the hospital.

 I walk inside and i ask to go back to Kate's room. She still isn't awake, but that's okay.. i don't want her to see me like this. I walk into the bathroom adjoined to her hospital room. i look in the mirror and i know why everyone looked at me weird when i walked in. I have blood scattered all over my face and on my knuckles. I clean my face and hands and walk back out to where Lacey is. i sit down beside her bed and try to relax. The beeping on her heart monitor is going faster and faster. I look over to her face and it looks like she is in pain. I run out of the room calling for a nurse and they run into the room and push me out of the way. I almost get upset when they put me out of the room but i keep quiet knowing that it is for the better.

When the nurses come back out they tell me that i can go back in now and i rush into the room. I go to Lacey's side immediately and take her hand. her face no longer looks like she is in pain. I sit down and put my head in my hand that i am not using to hold Lacey's cold one. 

I need my sister to wake up.. i cannot do this without her right now. I look over to her face and i stare at her. 

'your going to be okay, big sis' i think to myself 'i won't let any one hurt you anymore. I promise. It's my turn to take care of you."