TTMA [Complete ✔️]

22. In the stars

Knox's P.O.V

"Go talk to her, man!" Zane said as he punched me in the stomach. I pushed him to the ground, growling and snapping my teeth at him.

"Don't tell me what to do with my mate!" Kane snarled, taking control of my body.

The rest of the warriors, which were just trying to train were now gathered around us, watching as I lost control for the tenth time in the past two days. Living without her had been the most painful experience. It felt like I had lost her before I even got her.

I felt horrible for locking her up, but I wasn't about to let her hurt herself. In the moment of panic, it was all that came to mind, but I couldn't bring myself to go back and apologize.

If she hated me or was scared of me again, I wouldn't be able to take it. If she hurt herself, I wouldn't be able to take it. Too many ifs were crossing my mind and mixed with Kane's whining I hadn't slept for the entire two days.

My body, feeling the pain of being without its mate, was slowly starting to shut down, too exhausted to keep going. I needed her and I needed her fast!

"What the hell are you doing?" My sister snapped as she pulled her mate to his feet. I hadn't even noticed she had come, swimming in my own thoughts again.

"I'm sorry, Zane, I-" I tried to apologize, but he shook his head with a smile.

"All good as long as you keep Kane intact, bud!" He laughed, punching my shoulder in a playful manner.

Rose shook her head at us, or more at me, muttering 'mutts' under her breath. All three of us walked away from the sparring area to drink some water, observing as the rest of the pack continued their matches. The shocked looks on their faces were quite fun to see any time I smiled since no one had seen me do it since I was a kid.

"Can I see my new sister-in-law, you guys suck!" Rose pouted, Zane mocking her with a pout of his own.

"Didn't know you guys got that close!" I mumbled, rolling my eyes.

"Jealous much?" My Beta smirked, c*****g an eyebrow at me.

We had come to training together since I hadn't trained in a while, but obviously, it wasn't going to work. Kane was on the verge of shifting and tearing the pack house to shreds, along with anyone, who stood in his way so I decided it wasn't a good idea to be around the pack.

I excused myself, leaving my best friend and sister to take on training, again. Members of the pack bowed as I passed them, but my attention was fully on the way to the medical wing. I looked at my body, which was covered in sweat, and decided to at least take a shower first.

I let the warm water relax my aching muscles as I thought about what to say.

"Oops, sorry I locked you up like an animal, I was just too much of a coward to come back and own up to my mistakes!" Kane suggested, making me shut our link off with a low grumble.

When I was done with my shower, I dried my hair off and got dressed in some grey sweatpants and a white T-shirt. I wanted to relax with my mate, hear her sweet voice again, if, of course, she let me come close.

My breathing intensified as I walked to the medical wing, my chest tightening with both nerves and anticipation. Kane was pacing back and forth in my head, eager to see our mate again and perhaps meet her wolf.

As I stood in front of the door, however, any courage I had mustered up died, leaving only the fear. My stomach churned into a knot as I slowly raised my hand to knock, but I drew it back before it made contact with the door.

The only thing separating me from her was the door, making me want to rip it off its hinges. Her scent slowly made its way into my nostrils and I let it engulf me as I breathed it in. My hand, still balled into a fist, remained hanging in the air.

The thoughts of her being angry, or even worse, afraid, made me terrified. With the state my body was in, I wouldn't be able to see her eyes full of hatred or pain. I wasn't ready for her wolf to hate me before I even got the chance to meet her, I wasn't ready for the heartbreak that would follow because of my impulsive decision. I knew I was being selfish, I had known it from the second I locked her up, but I wasn't ready to face the consequences. Not yet at least.

I moved my hand back, letting it rest next to me as I took a deep breath to fill my lungs with her scent. I closed my eyes, imagining her in my arms, while I drowned in the sweet smell of vanilla and lavender. I heard the faint sniff that came from the inside, making my eyes snap open as I focused on my hearing.

Slow, steady footsteps moved closer and closer until they stood in front of the door, the hair on the back of my neck also standing up. I heard her place a hand on the handle and watched as she tried to open the door, followed by her disappointed sigh as she walked away.

"Open the dumb door before I do it myself!" Kane hissed, but I couldn't. I was so afraid of someone hurting her, so afraid of disappointing her, that I ended up doing it myself. The sigh she let out played over and over in my head until it became all I could hear.

I shook my head, anger rippling through my veins as I ran outside, where I shifted into my wolf. We ran for hours, his paws thudding against the muddy ground. The day went by, and the sun disappeared, preparing for its slumber and getting replaced by the moon.

It glowed, lighting the way for me. I could feel a presence, I was aware I wasn't alone and for the first time, I was grateful for it. Before, I used to think it was the wind, that surrounded me when I desperately ran away from him, from the pain, from myself, but now, I know the Moon Goddess had always been with me. She took from me so she could give me the greatest gift in return and was there to guide me every step of the way, although I didn't realize it back then.

Tonight's sky was full of tiny, glowing dots as they painted pictures. I watched them, the stars, connecting the small dots in my mind and making out weird figures to distract my racing thoughts.

I found myself sitting in my favorite spot, the one spot no one ever found me in when I was a pup, that needed to escape for a while. It wasn't anything special, just the roof of a small abandoned cottage. No one had lived in there for a very long time, it was covered in dust and cobwebs, but it saved me and my sister multiple times so it was special to us.

When I would get overwhelmed, I would hide on the roof and look out into the stars so I could tell my mom the stories they told. She would always be mad that I would just disappear, but as I grew older, she started to see the reason behind it and even encouraged me to do it, taking beating over beating so my sister and I could stay safe for a while.

I still talk to my mom on this very roof, but this time, she is one of the stars instead of listening to stories about them. She was my star, the brightest one of them all. She didn't deserve to die so young, but I knew she never left us alone. I also knew that she was safer there than she would have been here and that was the only thing that kept me going all those years.

I brought my knees to my chest, resting my head on them. My life had taken three huge turns in its course and Dalia was one of them. Out of all three turns, she was the only happy one, even if she didn't know it. It's exactly why I got so mad when she said she wanted to hurt herself.

She was my new star, my new reason to be alive. I saw the beauty of colors again just by breathing in the sweet mixture of her scent, I felt the need to live for the first time in years all because of her. So I could wake up next to her every day, so I could go to bed with her in my arms every night, so I could take every gulp of air, knowing she was next to me.

She was the reason I was alive and yet she wanted to deprive me of her presence? After so long of her being in pain she wanted to deprive herself of the chance to have a future, where she was safe and loved? I would never let it happen.

I shook my head and breathed in and out to suppress the new wave of anger, that I felt raise. I remained quiet for a while after that, finally paying attention to my thoughts instead of ignoring them. The May breeze caressed my skin in a gentle manner, but other than that, the night was as clear as can be. Not one noise could be heard, nothing disturbing the peace I felt every time I came here. That is, until I decided to disturb it myself.

"Hi, Mom! I haven't been here in a while." I shrugged, a guilty look crossing my features. "I hope you don't mind too much. I've missed you, have you missed me too?" I asked, my voice growing quiet as a small white feather landed on my hand, brought by the breeze.

"I'll take that as a yes." I smiled, memories of her own smile popping up in my mind. "I found my mate, mom! She... she's beautiful. The prettiest she-wolf I've ever laid eyes on. Her blonde wavy hair falls gently down her shoulders, her chocolate brown eyes make me get lost in them each and every time, her freckles are perfect, like the rest of her, and her smile lights up any room. She doesn't smile often though, mom." I grew quiet after that, taking a deep breath before continuing.

"She was hurt by bad people, just like us, like you and Rose. Don't worry, I made them pay as well, I just wish I had done it sooner. I wish there had been a way for you to meet her, pull her in a motherly embrace, and be there for her, when she misses her mother. I know I hate having to miss mine." A small, sad smile curled on my lips, the corners of my eyes filling with tears as everything became too much to bear at once.

"You would have loved her and she would have loved you! I'll bring her here one day, I promise you. Rose is also doing good. She's pregnant, mom! My little sister, your little girl is pregnant. Time flies, huh? Your first grandchild is on the way and you won't be here to hold it! Why, Mom? Why did you have to go so soon?" A lone tear escaped, but I quickly wiped it away, masking it with a bitter laugh.

"She would have loved for you to hold her hand as she gives birth and you would have loved to steal the baby until she forced you to give it back. I can imagine her children, along with mine, playing in the lake with you splashing them and showing them what rocks you had found in the water." I wiped my tears away again, feeling frustrated that I, an Alpha, was crying. I was supposed to be strong, strong enough to stop my mate's tears, yet I couldn't even stop my own.

"But don't worry, mom, we're not angry with you. We know it wasn't your fault. It turned out fine in the end, Rose made it. We both did. I finally feel happy and I can assure you she does too. You can rest easy now! I'll see you soon!"

A/N:

Hi, Treasures! Make sure you join my F-a-c-e-b-o-o-k group Teddy's Treasures for extra content and discussions! Ok, who's cutting onions in here?

P.s: Bonus chapter because it’s my birthday today ?