The shattered vow

Encounter with my ex

Two months have gone by, and I still haven't received any calls or texts from my crush.

I still couldn't believe he just disappeared into thin air without a trace of where or what he was doing. I just stare at my phone, scrolling through our previous chat, while I smile to myself. It indeed has been a fun time with him, though he's gone.

I wonder what he's doing, where he's going, who he's meeting and how he's faring. Most time I tend to stare at his pictures and the memories we had.

I regret losing my virginity to someone who wasn't ready to stay with me.

I have been rejecting guys for quite awhile and even those I dated without s*x.

But here I was, lost to a complete stranger and just within some seconds, I was down for him, what I had been keeping away from us.

It was a Saturday morning, and I wasn't going to work. We work Monday till Friday. Saturday and Sunday are for resting, which I love so much.

I need to clean my room and get things in order, before I think of going to the supermarket to get some groceries for myself. I brought out a blue bucket, mopping stick, detergent, broom and packer, all this equipment for my cleaning. I wanted to use my machine, but we don't have electric power on.

I took my phone from the drawer, put on a song and dropped it back. Listening to music whenever I'm doing my household chores is one thing I enjoy doing a lot. It helps me clear my mind and keep my spirit elevated. I remember when I was still staying with my parents, my phone was grounded because of music.

It was one sunny day. I was the only one at home. It was my turn to do the house chores. I locked the door out and started my journey of cleaning. My parents came back and stood outside for a long time, knocking without my knowledge that someone was at the door. I thought they would be coming back late, but unfortunately they came back quite earlier than expected. So I never pictured them coming back at that time of the day. My phone was on silent and kept far from me.

When I finally got to hear them, my mom stormed into the room with a dirty slap. At first, I was unconscious because I had never been slapped that way before.

“What is wrong with you, this girl?” Mum screamed on top of her voice.

“I'm sorry, I didn't know you were knocking, "I said, shivering.

“How would you know when you have blocked your senses and decided to be a stupid girl who lazes around all in the name of doing a chore for the whole day? She barked this time with anger.

I just stood there speechless and confused.

C'mon give me those things and get out of my sight, she said, requesting my phone and earpods.

I sluggishly gave her, walked back to my instruments for work and continued.

"Oh sorry my baby," my dad said to me as he walked into his room.

Since that day, I have never tired of working with my earpuds, just to avoid any form of embarrassment from my mum.

……

I took my bucket into the bathroom, fetched some water and commenced my morning routine.

I started in my kitchen, after sweeping and washing my dishes.

Staying in a self-contained apartment isn't my dream house of choice, but as it stands now, I have to manage since I don't have enough, and I also need to fend for my family most of the time.

All my dad did was to train me in school, which I would always be grateful for, but it is now my responsibility to train my siblings since I now work. It hasn't been easy for me, because I sometimes spend all my money on them without anything much left for me to use.

Within an hour, I was done with my cleanup. My room was sparkling pure white, and I could sense the sweet air coming into it through the opened window. I made sure every corner was touched without any left aside.

However, I got into the bathroom to freshen up after a long period of sweating profusely. I couldn't imagine life without water. I picked up some dresses from my wardrobe, a pair of trousers and a t-shirt with a hand purse where I placed my phone and some cash.

The supermarket is a bit far from my place, so I need to leave on time to be able to get home on time and get something ready for Sunday. I took a taxi instead of a bus to make the whole journey as fast as ever.

A few minutes after I was at the supermarket, I highlighted from the car after paying him off. The supermarket is the biggest in my vicinity and is known for its affordable prices. I do visit whenever I'm restocking on my foodstuffs to get goods at an affordable price and reduce cost for me. I walked into the supermarket, grabbed a basket and started my shopping journey gladly, not until something strange happened.

Just as I was walking along the shelf picking up the needed items, my hand froze midway to the shelf when I heard that voice, That voice I could never mistake.

“Amara?”

I turned slowly and there he was, my ex, my love, or at least, he used to be. Now he stood behind a woman clinging to his arm like a trophy she had just won.

“You look absolutely beautiful," he said, trying to place his hands on me.

“You must be mad, to do so," I said furiously.

“Do you think you still have a place around me or what? "Why would you want to try such a thing," I said, glaring at him.

“Oh C'mon, don't be so up tight, you are not the only virgin on earth," he said, screaming it out and drawing attention in our direction.

“Can you put yourself together, you this uncoordinated monkey," I said.

"Well, I can see you still haven't changed, Virgin Mary, you can take your virginity to hell. "I didn't give a dim, he said as he walked out of the supermarket.

The heat burned my face. My fingers tightened on the basket handle. I wanted to throw it at him, scream at him, but my voice betrayed me. I hurriedly bought a few things, simply turned away, forcing my feet to carry me toward the checkout.

My ex-boyfriend was the best as if the time I met him, he was such a loving and kind-hearted young man. All the time spent with him was so adorable, but it didn't last.

He approached me after a stressful day at work and offered me a ride home. I was reluctant to refuse, so I took up the offer and after that day, we started getting along with each other and, before I knew it, he asked me out to be his girlfriend.

I told him strictly no s*x in this relationship, and he accepted, saying many of the reassuring words, but 3 months into the relationship, he came visiting on a certain day, and tired forcing himself on me, but I turned him down. That was how the whole problem started. He came out clearly to tell me he couldn't have a relationship without being s****l with his partner and if I wasn't ready yet, then we should call off the relationship.

It was a tough period for me, but I scaled through, with the help of someone who was always there to see me through and console me. I loved him with everything in me, but it was so painful that we had to let everything go because of s*x.

It has always been my problem with almost all the men I have come across, and most times they end up with a breakup, which is much of a problem for me, because I never fell in love with them at the initial point.

By the time I got home, my groceries lay forgotten on the counter, I sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor, my mind replaying every second of that moment in the supermarket. Each replay hurt worse.

Then, three sharp knocks on the door…

I froze. No one visits me unannounced.

Another knock louder.

My heart thudded against my ribs, I wiped my eyes and stood slowly. Whoever was on the other side of that?

The door would either heal the wound or drive the knife deeper.

I reached for the handle.