CHAPTER 6 HEAVEN WHITE
1111 Words
Three months in school, everybody’ s forgotten about the photos and no one was following me, there are some students whose making fun with me but it’s okay, they will get tired soon. They don’t bother me at all. After the debate activity in our classroom, one of my classmates named John asked me to go out with him.
I think it’s not bad to start another life with someone, what I mean is someone that can be more than be friends. Anyways, about Liza and Sky, they are not dating, it’s just a dare, they are both playing truth and dare, so, Sky is still single and he is focused in his sport and academic. We are still having a conversation, but not too much it is because we both too busy.
Okay, back to John, for the second time, I was invited by a guy. John invited me out, because he said he wanted to date me. I agreed because I knew I was big and could have a boyfriend who would take care of me and protect me. John is a kind and smart student, member of a basketball team, tall, not that popular but also known all over campus.
I just hope it is true that he will love me. He said on Saturday night we will meet. Yes, I still did not tell him that I no longer have real parents and I grew up in an orphanage, but I decided to tell him that night, I want to know if he will accept someone like me or not.
We exchanged cell phone numbers to text.
I walked to a restaurant not far from our house. It's good there because I didn't spend the fare. I told my mom that I would go out with a man; I thought she would scold me, but no, she told me that she also felt how to fall in love so why would she forbid me. She said that she just wants to fulfill my promise to graduate and get a job.
I saw John outside the restaurant, he waved at me and I smiled at him as I walked towards him. “Hi Heaven.” He winked at me and hugged me. A bit awkward, but maybe it's normal when you date. We went inside and ordered our food, we talked about our likes and dislikes, including what life plan was and what we wanted to achieve.
Our dinner came and we ate, then John held my hand as if he was caressing it, I was a little nervous because he was also staring at me all the way down to my chest. I immediately took my hand, but he tightened his grip. He pulled my hand to kiss his lips, smelled it and kissed him again and again. I no longer like what he is doing, so I said goodbye to go home.
I stood up table and went out, I was about to cross when he held my arm tightly.
I am here in front of our house. John did not take me home because he did not have the means to take a nerd like me. I just chose to walk and go home alone. Because otherwise, John's evil plan for me might have continued. He want to take me inside the motel and do our business. He also threatened me that if I complained to the police, he would kill my mother. As I walked towards my mom, I fix my face, smile, and I also comb my hair with my hands. “Oh… He is handsome, but kind an arrogant, I don’t like him for you.” She said. As if I liked him too for being my boyfriend. I entered in my room and lay down. Can’t believe this is all happening to me.
I got up off my bed and went to the bathroom to take a shower. I cannot hold my tears anymore. I cried in a bathroom silently. “Why is this all happening to me? I just want to be happy, make friends and have a boyfriend.” After the bath I went out and go the kitchen to search a knife. There is nothing run in my mind, I think this is the only thing to escape.
I want to die, I feel like I don’t belong in this world. I hold a knife and pointed at the stomach. I am ready to die. My heart is beating so fast, I stop when I heard footsteps towards the kitchen I hid the knife and face where the footstep coming from. “Hi sweetheart, what are you doing here?” It’s my mom. “Um… I like a glass of milk, so I decided to make my own.” I replied.
When I saw my mom, I saw a million reasons to live; I will not let this happen again. I smiled and I walk to my mother for hug her tightly. “I love you mom.” I said. She hugs me back. After that I went to my bed and rest. Before I sleep, I check my phone if there’s any messages, and yes I got a message.
“See you at school on Monday morning.” From Sky. I cried again, I need someone to talk to. But, do I have to trust Sky? He is a boy, and I know that I f would tell him everything he will hate me; it is because I am a dirty woman and what’s worse is, if I will tell him, his life would be in danger because of me.
I will not let anyone sacrifice their lives because of my emotions. I decided to sleep and try to empty my mind.
In the morning, the weather was cold; I was wearing a jacket, pajamas and socks. I decided to go to church today because I knew the Lord felt my resentments. I took the umbrella and walked to the nearest church here with us. While walking I also saw Sky on the other side of the road walking as well, maybe he was also going to church so I called him. “Sky!” I raised my hand so he could see me. He looked at me and crossed over to get closer to me.
“Where are you going?” I asked him. “In the church to pray.” He told me. “Let's go together, that's also where I'm going.” While we were in the middle of the conversation a heavy rain suddenly fell. Fortunately, I brought an umbrella, I opened it and the two of us took refuge, because the umbrella I was carrying was quite small, it was just right for one so we both we got wet in the rain a bit.
- Writer
