Whiz-Savage Souls MC

Whiz I just finished my shower. Hot, raging hot. For some reason, I always felt like the boiling water would burn away the pain. Spoiler. It didn't. Nothing did. Jane was still out cold. I gave her some TLC after another intense session, and she was sleeping it off. I always took care of subs well after. It's what I was known for. Being an absolute savage in the sheets, and finishing off with incredible aftercare. A bath, food and sleep. I never cuddled after. Until I found a woman I completely clicked with, I wasn't going to start giving them the wrong idea. Not that I saw that happening, unfortunately. That's what I liked about Jane. She knew the deal. She also had no interest in settling down. None at all. At least with men. She was bis*ual and having watched her over the years, I think it was safe to say she'd be more likely to click with another woman. She used me for release, and I was fine with that. She liked pain, which wasn't as rare as you'd think, but I really pushed the limits, and not many could handle that. I guess it came down to my childhood. I learned to take pain early. Having a sadistic father does that to a guy. He worked me over harder and harder every time, because I took it on like nothing most of the time. The day that I took his life, he told me I was sick. Fu*ked up in the head. That no one would love me. I snapped. And be*t him to dea*h. Lucky me, the courts knew of the ab*se. It was clearly documented. Dozens of counselors, teachers and neighbors had made reports. I saw the pity in their eyes. They did all they could do. But my dad had money, and judges in our small town? Loved money. So it was ignored. So when I turned up at the police station at 15, covered in blo*d, they knew they fu*ked up. Was ruled self-defense. No questions asked. His brother took over everything and I left. Living on the streets. I met Chaos after entering a fighting ring. Fighting for money kept my stomach full. And I lived for it. Seeing how much pain I could take got me off. Sick, I know. But feeling something other than emotions was exhilarating. And dishing it out wasn't too bad either. Then one night a biker approached me. Big guy, pretty intimidating. I was worried. The last adult man who approached me like this was my dad, and it never ended well. But this guy had kind eyes. I didn't feel scared. Chaos. President of a biker gang, the Savage Souls. He offered me a roof over my head, education, a place in a family. He only had one condition. Get my GED and a hobby. A useful one. One I could make a career with outside the club. I had always been good at art, drawing in particular. But I wanted to try something else. I agreed, and he took me right under his wing. I finally had a home. Brothers. I didn't have to look over my shoulder. Worry about my next meal, wonder where I'd sleep. And I met my best friend Ace. We both came from the streets. He understood me. I understood him. And we'd d*e for each other. I'd d*e for all my brothers, but me and Ace just bonded. We didn't need to use words to communicate. But we were very different as well. I thrived on emotions, pain. He was locked down. No emotions. And that was OK. He had his demons and I had mine. We just chose to deal with them in our own ways. When the time came to decide what I wanted to do within the club, I started tinkering with computers. And to my surprise, I was da*n good at it. I soon found myself on the dark web. Which is a whole other story. But I did learn from some of the best. Soon I was hacking into CCTV. Able to look into financial records of anyone I wanted. My connections grew deeper and Chaos was proud. And that did something to me. To make this father figure proud was everything to me. So, when I was patched in, he made me the official IT guy. And it gave me life. Being able to not only help the club as a whole, but also my brothers when they needed help, made me have purpose. Helping Diablo with Alex, Ace with Jasmine. I was proud of myself. Those poor woman had sh*t situations, and I was able to help set them free. It felt good. But I still felt hollow. Ace always told me I would find a woman that would make me whole. But the older I got, the more that dream seemed to slip away. I loved women. Most of the brothers had a distaste for relationships. But I just wanted a woman to come home to. That shared my pleasure. That I could care for, worship. And then James was born. That kid had me wrapped around his finger. The fact that Ace named him after me broke something in me. The want, no the need to have what he had. A family. Don't get me wrong. My club was a family. The best kind of family. But I wanted my own outside of it. But I was beginning to accept it wasn't happening. Not like I expected to find the one sticking nee*les under her skin while I fu*k her, but a guy can dream. I had been on dates and although the women were sweet, and probably a great catch for someone "normal", I knew I couldn't bring out my dark side to them. They'd run. And probably get a restraining order to be honest. And I never, ever, fu*ked club girls. I got the purpose of them within the club, but they were clingy as he*l. I saw how they attached themselves to one particular brother and then tried to sabotage them when they found an old lady. No thanks. So I'd just keep doing me. Drowning my sorrows in BD*M and alcohol. Totally normal, totally a good outlet. Definitely healthy. Sure. Sure Whiz. Keep thinking that.