Pretty for a Black Girl

“Get the f**k OFF ME!!” The yelling startled me out my sleep. I’m surprised I even heard it this time cause I usually sleep right through it. I opened my eyes a bit and wipe the sticky goo out my eyes. I glance at the old alarm clock on my nightstand. 7:45 am. Mama up there arguing with her boyfriend of the month Mr. Charlie again. Damn. I wish she would stop f*****g with these nothing ass niggas. I rolled my eyes and kicked my legs from under the covers and out the bed. The floor feels cold, even with the thin project rugs glued to the floor. “You b***h! Where’s my wallet?! Thieving hoe, couldn’t wait till I fell asleep!!” Mr. Charlie bellowed. These fights always end the same. Mama robs the men blind, they get mad and try to rough her up and she threatens to call the cops. Every time. I wonder when she’s gonna get tired of this s**t. I stretch and scratch my head a bit while I walk to the bathroom, feeling the days funk setting into the house. “It’s gonna be a shitty one for sure.” I thought to myself, trying to ignore the chaos pursuing in the next room. And I for sure wasn’t gonna be staying here to find out how bad it was gonna get. I hurriedly washed up with the small sliver of soap we had left and brushed my teeth. Now, I had to figure out the quickest way to make my hair look presentable. I pause to listen again, silence. I guess they’re making up now. I shivered to the thought. Ew. Thankfully Mama took me to get some cornrows a few weeks back but they were long past their expiration date. Thankfully I stole some hair gel from the family dollar last week or my hair would have been sticking out even more than it already was. I stared emptily at myself in the mirror for a while as I shoveled little handfuls of hell over my naps. For 13, I’m built like I’m way beyond my years, one of the many things I got from my mom, but I still have my baby face. Smooth brown skin and big brown eyes. I’m just average. Nothing too special about me. I blink my thoughts back and rush to my room to get dressed. “KARA BABY!!” Mama yelled frantically from her room. Shocked she was hollering my name for help, I ran to her room. As I turned the corner, I noticed mama sitting in the far corner of the room grasping a pair of scissors in her hand, staring at her bed. I follow her gaze and see where her panic stemmed from. Laying across the bed was Mr. Charlie, blood seeping from his back. “Aw f**k MAMA WHAT DID YOU DO?!” I turned to her screaming. I ran to the bed and checked Mr. Charlie’s pulse. Nothing. I turned at look at mama, sadness and anger in my eyes,” You f*****g killed him, mama! What are we gonna do?!”, I yelled through my tears, nearly falling to my knees. “It’s gonna be okay baby.”, Mama said, rising to her feet from the corner through uneven breaths. “We just gotta think this through...”, Mamas voice trailed off. She’s really done it this time. And there may be no way out. I know one of my neighbors called the cops by now so it’s only a matter of time before they show up. I’m convinced this b***h is trying to ruin our lives.