His Hidden Desires

An Unexpected Encounter

Shawn

The day started out like any other, though a little nastier than he would have preferred. After checking on the cats and settling them down with some food, Shawn made his way downstairs into his café. With the weather outside, he knew customers would start to swarm in for hot drinks and warm pastries, so he quickly got started. Two hours of baking later, he was ready to open for the morning. After ushering the cats down into their area, Shawn quickly unlocked the door and headed behind the counter for the morning rush. The weather brought in a steady stream of customers, both his regulars and some new faces.

Most people were readily surprised when they’d first come into the café. When he first made the decision to open a cat café, he knew it would be a risk. Especially with the concept he wanted to use. After travelling overseas and exploring so many different countries, the one thing that always grabbed his attention was any cafes or shops that involved animals. It wasn’t something the states had but he knew it could be popular, so after scrapping together the initial funds and a small loan from a friend, he opened Clawfinated Coffee 5 years earlier. To call it a roaring success would be an understatement. It had its pitfalls along the way as well, but after five years it was a staple in the Soho district.

It was just before lunch when the door whooshed open and a tall, voluptuous blonde woman rushed inside. “Ah,” the woman said as she shook out her hair. “It’s nastier than my Aunt Linda’s goulash out there.” Hurrying over with a towel Shawn scowled.

“Gwen, don’t shake like a dog in here. You’re getting water everywhere and I just cleaned up from the morning rush.” After shoving one of his closest friends toward a table, Shawn rushed back behind the counter to make her favourite latte. Shawn placed a raspberry muffin and the latte in front of his friend before he settled himself across from her with a smile. “What are you doing here? I thought you had court today.” Grabbing Shawn’s hand, Gwen looked at him solemnly.

Damn, he thought. Something’s majorly wrong if she’s looking at me like that. With a sigh he said, “Out with it. Whatever it is can’t be as bad as you think. Though you being here and not in court might say differently.” Swallowing hard, Gwen mustard up the courage to share the news she heard on her way to court.

“I was heading in when a close colleague called. He said he was heading to a will reading for an old client.” She winched and rushed out with the rest. “Shi Lin passed away three days ago. His funeral is today, apparently.” Shawn froze as the news washed over him. Shi Lin had been an icon in this city, but he’d also been his best friend’s father and Shawn knew how bitter their relationship had become after Khai’s mother passed away.

Does this mean Khai’s come home? It had been a few years since they last saw each other, though they kept in touch through texts and occasional phone calls. Why didn’t he call me? Should I call him? Dropping his head to the table, Shawn felt a sudden headache coming on at what this could mean. He heard Gwen sigh and felt her hand on his shoulder. Turning his head, he looked up at her with sadness.

“What are you going to do?” she asked sharply. “You know my opinion on this.”

“Yes,” Shawn barked out. “You’ve made it abundantly clear over the last 8 years what you think about the situation. However, you know as well as I that you can’t just turn your feelings off. If he turns up, I will continue with my steadfast denial of any feelings I might have for him.”

“Meow”, Shawn turned and picked Miko up to give him some love. Gwen shook her head at Shawn’s stubbornness and stood up. “One day you will need to face your feelings fully or you will be miserable and alone for the rest of your life. These cats can’t give you the love you desire or need. My opinion, jump him and let the cards fall where they will. And with that I need to get to court.” Gwen waved and rushed out as quickly as she rushed in.

Sighing, Shawn grabbed the damp towel she’d left behind and headed to the back. Figuring it’d be best to put this whole thing out of his mind, he got started on the next morning’s dough. Normally, this was a great distraction from his everyday problems, but this issue was the biggest one he had. It was something he’d kept mostly to himself for almost 15 years. Looking back, he wasn’t even sure when it started, but by the time he realized his feelings for Khai it was too late. They’d met when they were ten and as different as they were, the friendship just clicked into place. They had been through so much together, but Shawn had never been brave enough to tell Khai his biggest secret. He’d always been afraid Khai would push him away as he'd seen it happen to so many others like him.

Why? Why did things have to turn out like this? One day we are playing basketball like normal and the next time… “f**k!!” Shawn yelled in anguish. Sliding to the floor, he laid his head on his knees as years of pent-up emotion came pouring out. He wished he’d never acknowledged his feelings for Khai. The pain all these years brought was too much. He’d done his best to move on, but every time he met someone new it had never felt right. He knew deep in his heart that Khai was the only one for him, but it was a hopeless love. Khai was as straight as any man could be. Women, who he discovered early on, had been plenty. Especially once they learned his name, Khai was never without female companionship.

The bell on the front door rang, so Shawn pushed himself up and forced himself back to work. The rest of the afternoon and evening passed quickly. The storm finally blew itself out in early evening. As seven approached, Shawn started cleaning up. The cats were heartily running around with glee, trying their best to trip their human companion. After everything was shut down in the back and cleaned, he got started on sweeping and mopping the front. He put on some light music and was just starting to relax after a very emotionally draining day. Ready to call it, he put the mop aside as the bell on the door tinkled.

Frustration welled up as Shawn realized he had forgotten to lock the front door. Turning, ready to shoo the unwelcomed customer away, he froze at the sight in front of him. The man standing in front of him hadn’t changed in years. Tall, muscular with broad shoulders, his dark hair was pulled back into a short tail. Sharp, dark eyebrows cut across even darker eyes that hid a hint of sadness in them. Shaking, Shawn could only watch as the man he desired more than anyone walked toward him. Blinking hard, he tried to muster up words, any words, but could only think of how attractive Khai looked.

“Shawn.”

Shawn shivered at the warm honeyed voice. It hadn’t changed much. If anything, it seemed deeper. Feeling warmth, he looked down and saw Khai’s hands holding his. He looked back up into those dark eyes as Khai started to speak again.

“Shawn,” Khai whispered softly. “Will you marry me?”

With a quick gasp, Shawn felt his world tilt dangerously. Pushing himself free from Khai’s grasp, he backed up unsteadily.

Yoowwweelll!!! Suddenly, a sharp screech wrenched through the air. Dropping to his knees, he grabbed Miko and started apologizing for stepping on him. After taking a minute to steady his thoughts, he looked up at Khai.

“Did the funeral scramble your brains, cause a mental breakdown or something?” Shawn asked while trying to put more space between them. Standing with Miko in his arms, he felt safer with the extra protection. Still trying to wrap his brain around what Khai had asked, he headed behind the counter to grab a drink. After putting Miko down on the counter, he raised the bottle of whiskey he kept hidden and shot Khai a look.

“I think we need to talk,” Shawn said as he headed towards the stairs to his apartment.