I'm in Love with my Little Sister

Chapter Three

As I walked back I realised I didn’t know the way. I freeze and try to remember the way I came but, to be honest, I had been too focused on Logan to know which direction we were going. I let my head fall into my hands as I groan. I didn’t know the address of the new house, so I couldn’t even ask for directions. I mentally slap myself and I start walking in any direction hoping it’s the right one. While this situation I've managed to get myself in is stressful, the view of the sun setting was something which I could get used to. Almost a perfect view. It’s so different without gunfire’s and bombs being in the background. I've gotten used to the sound that I almost miss it. It’s the sound I fell asleep too. I know its bad, but it became my new normal. I know there is one thing to make my view perfect and if I were to turn around, I would see the angel standing by her bedroom window listening to music, not even noticing my presence.

I pull out my phone and I dial my mothers’ number. Once she picks up after three missed calls, I beg her to send someone to come pick me up as I have no idea where I am.

“Okay, Damon. Jasper! Go get your brother.” I hear my mother yelling at my stepbrother. I chuckle and thank her before hanging up. I didn’t wait long before I heard the heavy footsteps belonging to Jasper.

“Dude how did you get so lost?” Jasper pants while he starts chuckling. I smirk, and we start walking home. I mentally take note on where we go and surprisingly its not far from the new house. A couple turns to the right, one left turn, walk straight for five minutes, walking past a small park and then make another right and voilà, you’ve arrived at your destination on left. I still can’t get over how much everyone has changed; Jasper looks like he breaks a lot of hearts whereas before, he used to be this scrawny kid who people used to pick on. Nathan has that vibe saying she would kill you if you broke her heart; her thick curls encouraging it.

By the time we got back, Jasper had filled me in on everything that I've missed. He’s working now at some fancy company, while Logan is in her last year of school. Jadyn wanted to go to the same school as the others just to get closer to them. Apparently, Logan gave her a rough start. Peyton has just started their secondary school and seems to get on fine.

“Mum missed you like crazy when you left. I don’t remember much from nine years ago, but that; the constant crying and begging for her son; that I do remember.” Jasper says as we reached the door. I nod my head.

“I knew she would be like that. She had all of you with her, but mum…” I couldn’t finish my sentence but with jaspers knowing hand on my shoulder, I offered him a weak smile. I opened the front door to the smell of my mothers Roast Dinner cooking. As the smell reached my nose, I suddenly remembered how much I missed my mothers cooking and how I crave for her home-made mash potatoes. I also floated to the dinner table like a cartoon character. Jasper laughs at my face and I scowl at him.

“Easy for you mate, I haven’t had mums cooking in 9 years.” I raise my voice at him. Jasper pulls a face and he jogs to the dining room table.

“Hurry up Damon, my chicken is getting cold.” My mums' shouty voice echoes through the house.

“Yes, Ma’am,” I say as the join the rest of the family.

God, why did I eat so much? My stomach feels like it's going to explode, but if someone asked me if I would go back in time and eat less; I would say no. My mothers cooking is the best, it wouldn’t be a surprise if she came home and said she's going to be the Queen’s royal chef. How I've-

Ping

I look over to my phone as it lights up the dark room. I ignore it at first thinking it could be Mya but when the second ping sounded a few moments after, I knew I had to check it.  

Logan: I noticed you got lost earlier. Did you get home okay?

Logan: Crap, I didn’t mean to text you this late. I hope I didn’t wake you up.

I chuckle mentally and tapped on the message box to send back a text.

Damon: It’s okay, I’m so stuffed from mums dinner that I couldn’t sleep. I smile at my message and press send. I wait for a moment, my heart speeding up. I never knew id get this excited over a girl texting me. I'm 21 and never had a crush on anyone else, sue me.

Logan: fair enough, mums food is the best.

Damon: Right… anyway, why are you up so late? I type as I check the time. It is almost 1 am and according to Jasper, she is still in school.

Logan: I just finished a massive project and I remembered I promised to text you. I always need my promises J   She's just so darn cute. I smile at the screen, hoping she would somehow know I'm happy. I pause for a minute, wondering what to type back.

Damon: sometimes I still think this is a dream and I’ll wake up, still in the war. I hover my fingers about the ‘send’ button, uncertain if I should send the message. I ignore the sickly feeling growing in my stomach and hit send. I wait a few seconds for a reply. A minute later and I still stare at the screen. The clock told me it has been five minutes since I sent the text and the fact that she hasn’t replied told me that either she fell asleep or she didn’t like the fact that I unloaded my feelings onto her. My fear is that it’s the second option. I turn off the screen on my phone and place it on my dresser again.

Fear consumes me to the point where I believe she is ignoring my messages because she didn’t need to give me the second thought. I suddenly wanted to hate myself for making myself feel like she actually liked me. I feel so stupid for getting excited when she texted me. While we only exchanged a few messages, my heart felt so much in the little time. I don’t know when I drifted off to sleep but I do remember being so consumed with self-hate and doubt that the dried up tear trail on my cheek in the morning; didn’t surprise me.

My dreams betrayed me during the night as I had a dream which is familiar to me. In my dream world, Logan and I aren’t step-siblings and we met at school. She became my childhood sweetheart and I was her prince. We live happily together, away from the fear of the world and at the thought of that kind of future made my heart jump through my body. As my body clock woke me at daybreak, I sigh as the realisation that my dream was just that…a dream. The happy ending that tills never happen to my love story.

As I checked my phone for any messages from Joe or Mya, I notice I did one text message. About 10 minutes after I gave up on Logan responding to me. When I opened it, I saw a lengthy paragraph from Logan. All that time when I thought she had been ignoring me when she was really sending me a text which I will always treasure.

Logan: I know it will take some time getting used to being back at home, in civilisation and I know there will be changes to your everyday routine. I also know that you are going to feel scared and frightened. I read about PTSD and when I heard you were coming back, I worried that you may have it. I wanted to ready myself (Idk if that’s the right word to use, bear with me) in case you'd need support. I know that your fears are real and if you ever need someone to bring you back to reality; that you are safe and sound and alive, then I will be that person. I will be here for you and I will come whenever you need me. I want to support you the best way I can, you are my brother and I love you, Damon, don’t ever forget that.

I love you, Damon, don’t ever forget that. I never will.