All Of The Dead (a necromancer story)

Chapter 6: Heartache

Esmeralda

I woke up to Lucan watching me sleep and felt heat rush to my cheeks. Usually I was the one doing the staring. “Hi,” I smiled.

“Hi beautiful,” he smiled back before leaning down and kissing me.

I smiled against his lips and stretched beneath the blankets.

“We should get up for work, right?” I asked.

He laughed softly. “Babe, you’ve been dead for half a year and as soon as you’re back, you want to work?”

“I like working with you and Dana, plus I really want to see her.”

He grew a little distant and uncomfortable and bluntly answered, “ok.”

“Are you ok?” I frowned at him.

He tried acting nonchalant and smiled at me, though something about it felt forced.

“Of course I am.” He kissed me quickly on the lips and got up and started to get dressed, so I couldn’t ask anything else.

I noticed in the corner of the room that he’d kept all of my clothes folded neatly. Both the newer clothes and my old. It was so cute that he’d done that.

I smiled softly and picked out my old clothes of a white blouse and black trousers and tried not to grumble about being a bigger woman again.

At least my hair was still nice and healthy looking.

I used a hair claw to clip up the top half.

While Lucan was in the shower and basically avoiding me, I put on makeup, surprised I still remembered how to do it and I was very happy with the results.

I was no unnatural beauty anymore, but I did love the exotic look I’d created. I added a red rose clip to the side of my hair and softened my features with foundation that softened the harshness of my midnight skin.

I no longer had the beautiful shimmer that had looked like tiny diamonds and stars anymore, but I did still hold the unusually midnight black skin that being a vampire had given me. I had been almost midnight black as a human, and my vampire gifts had made it a few shades darker.

I smoked my eyes out and did a cat eye look and wore red lipstick.

When I went to find Lucan, he was sitting on the bed pulling on his black combat boots.

He stood up and looked at me. He came and wrapped his arms around my waist pulling me in close. “You look gorgeous, babe.” He kissed me on the cheek.

“Thank you,” I smiled shyly and then added, “are you not talking in your old gentlemanly ways anymore?”

I didn’t mean to sound so disappointed, but clearly I did because he laughed softly and answered, “sorry, it’s been a long while since anyone has wanted me to.”

He leaned down closer. “I’ll try to be more myself...my lady.” He winked and I felt my face heat up.

When we got to work, Dana was there, and I raced in and grabbed her into a tight bear hug. “Dana!” I squealed.

“S.hit!”

folders scattered everywhere as she nearly dropped everything.

She looked at me, and when she realized who I was she hugged me back and squealed too.

“Es, holy f.ucking s.hit! How the hell are you back!”

I laughed into her shoulder.

“Lucan brought me back with some other necromancers like him, and I had help my end from an elf…it’s a long story.”

“It sure is.” She was glaring at Lucan when she said it.

He hung his coat up and then made his way over to me.

Th office lights reflected softly against his golden flecked ice-blue eyes as he stopped beside me. Placing a hand lightly on my waist, he leaned down, kissed my cheek and quietly said, “I’ll be in my office if you need me, darling.”

He didn’t even acknowledge Dana, which was really weird. When he was in his office I whispered to her, “are you two ok?”

She had that same awkward and uncomfortable look on her face that I’d seen on Lucan earlier, I’d never seen Dana look uncomfortable about anything.

“No, we’re good.” She waved a hand dismissively. “We’re just more interested in you right now.”

She grinned at me and walked back to the computer behind her desk.

She was shutting me out like he was. I knew something was up, maybe they’d had a fight, I didn’t know, and I couldn’t ask because she opened the door and let the clients that started queuing come in.

During our lunch break, Dana went into the kitchen as usual, but Lucan didn’t. I went into his office to check on him.

I stood outside his door for a moment before knocking lightly.

“Come in.”

I opened it and found him sitting behind his desk.

He smiled up at me from his seat. “You alright, darling?”

I nodded. “Yes, I just wanted to make sure you are too.”

He held his arms out to me and said, “come here.”

I went over, and he made me straddle his lap so that my feet were not quite touching the floor and my arms were around his neck for support.

The warmth of him seeped into me.

I hadn’t realised how much I’d missed this.

Just sitting with him.

Feeling his heartbeat against me.

Feeling safe.

“Why are you not coming out of your office?” I asked.

Looking up at me, he stroked a piece of my hair away from my face. “Because I was hoping we could have a bit of alone time.”

He kissed me and only pulled away to make me stand and remove my trousers and underwear, then he pulled me back on top of him. Pulling out his hard e.rection from his trousers he pushed me down onto it, making me gasp.

“You ok?” He breathed.

I nodded and whispered, “it feels good, but Dana might catch us.”

“She won’t, and she’s seen it all before anyway.”

“Umm, she’s seen all of you before, Mr, not me and not you having s**x with someone else.”

“Well, she kind of has seen me have s**x with someone else, but it doesn’t matter she won’t come in here.”

He started moving inside of me, but I asked, “how did she see you with someone else?”

He wasn’t even looking at my face at this point, he was staring at my b.reasts where he had unbuttoned my shirt when he mumbled, “it’s a weird story, basically me and Dana were really drunk and took home a swinger couple, I f.ucked the wife, and she f.ucked the husband.”

I wanted to ask more questions, but he grabbed my a.ss cheeks and moved me back and forth on his c***k hard and fast, making me cry out in pleasure.

I was going to come, and I didn’t want to be loud, so I grabbed his hand and put it over my mouth to muffle me.

He kept his hand over my mouth and f.ucked me harder.

Still straddling him In his chair, I held on to the back of the chair and rolled my hips against his, helping him until I came screaming into his hand, pleasure consuming me and as was the new normal, I came again and again until he came inside of me and pulled out.

I cuddled into his chest not standing right away, and he wrapped his arms around me.

For a few moments neither of us said anything.

Outside his office I could hear muffled voices, the occasional ringing phone, drawers opening and closing , Dana laughing at something one of the clients said.

Normal sounds.

Sounds I hadn’t heard in what felt like forever.

After the emptiness of purgatory, every little thing felt louder somehow.

Lucan’s fingers moved absentmindedly against my back, tracing slow circles.

Normally that would have relaxed me.

Normally I would have melted against him and forgotten everything else.

But I couldn’t shake the feeling twisting inside my stomach.

Something was wrong.

When he kissed my forehead, I pulled back enough to look at him. “Lucan?”

“Hm?”

“What’s up with you and Dana? And don’t say nothing, because she’s being weird about you, too.”

When he didn’t answer, I pulled back to look at him. His eyes were cold and neutral, so I couldn’t read him.

I asked what I feared. “Did you and Dana, uh, you know, have s**x or something while I was gone?”

“No, I didn’t sleep with her,” he said but waited a little too long to reply.

My heart started to race slightly, it was still beating that strange rhythm since I’d fed from Lucan.

He looked away from me and grew quiet.

“Lucan, what did you do?”

He looked back up at me and tried to stroke my hair. “Nothing, baby.”

I s.lapped his hand away, getting worried now and calmly said, “tell me, otherwise whatever I’m thinking will be a hundred times worse.”

He didn’t try to touch me again and cleared his throat before answering. “Well, after I’d tried everything I knew as a necromancer and travelling the country to find a witch who could tell me more, it all came to nothing, and I didn’t have any more ideas for over four months. Dana was getting p.issed off with me and thought it was this stupid idea that I was both struggling with your death and also sexually frustrated.”

“You wanted s**x?” I asked confused.

He shook his head. “No, I wasn’t interested in s**x, and I sure as hell wasn’t interested in anyone else, I swear, but my balls were still full, and I’d still feel horny. I tried giving myself a handjob, but it didn’t really help.”

“So?” I asked when he stopped talking.

He sighed uncomfortably but carried on, “we trained in the hall for a bit, and when she was on top of me she kissed me. I pulled away and told her to stop, but she kissed me again, and I kissed her back, but it was only a few seconds and I pushed her off and got up.”

“Lucan, I want you to tell me every single detail. Leave nothing out.”

“It doesn’t even matter, it was nothing.” He leaned in to kiss me, but I moved back. “Tell me everything.”

He sighed again and couldn’t meet my eyes. “She lectured me, she thought if I got it out of my system I’d have a clearer head.” He ran his hand through his hair and Carried on, “We did some stuff—“

I put my finger to his lips and said, “I want every detail.”

He groaned in frustration but answered, “I pushed her up against the wall and kissed her. I told her I wouldn’t f***k her, only foreplay, and I uh, fingered her while she played with my d.ick. I made her come before I did so she went down, and uh, you know, gave me head.”

I was feeling angry at this point and sarcastically said, “what? Be more specific.”

He was looking down at his lap when he said, “she sucked my c***k and swallowed, is that what you want to hear?” He sounded annoyed, but then said, “I know it’s wrong, I couldn’t even come until I was thinking about you. I’m so f.ucking sorry, but weirdly, it did f.ucking help, like straight away I came up with the idea that Diamond or whatever her name is might know more necromancers like me.”

In a quieter tone, so low I wouldn’t have picked up on it if I were human, he said, “I didn’t want to admit to myself that I’d given up. I truly believed you were gone for good, I didn’t think there was truly a way to bring you back, and I’m so sorry.”

My heart hurt so much, I could feel the tears falling down my cheeks. It wasn’t completely fair of me to be feeling this way, because he was right, I had been dead with no guarantee I’d ever come back, and it was natural he might have wanted comfort in the arms of a woman, a woman who was also he’s best friend and understood what he was going through. Unfortunately it was my first time ever feeling heartbreak, and so I couldn’t be the strong understanding person right now.

He tried to pull me back against him, but I resisted.

“Please, Es, I’m so sorry, Please forgive me.”

I pulled away and got back onto my feet. “I’m sorry, I just don’t think I can do this right now. I need to go home.”

“Wait, what does that mean?” He got up too and took a step towards me.

“It means what I said,” I snapped, feeling angry again.

“So you don’t want to be with me anymore?”

“We weren’t really together anyway, I was only at your home for protection, and we were mostly just dating. It’s not like you were in love with me or anything.”

He looked down at the floor at that, and seeing his beautiful face looking so sad broke me more, I needed to get away, I didn’t want him to see me cry.

“I need to go,” I just about managed to get out.

He nodded, then looking up from the floor, he came over, placing a hand gently on my cheek and murmured, “I understand,” and kissed my cheek softly.

I all but ran out of that room and when Dana saw me grabbing my bag she asked, “what’s wrong?”

I spun around and glared at her, “don’t you talk to me!” I yelled and left as fast as I could.