Marrying A Snapping Turtle

If anyone mentioned the Hendricks people naturally thought of the Jacques; the two families had a friendship that lasted for over a century. The running joke was: if you fight with a Hendrick you’ll get punched by a Jacques. The families had always wanted to be further bound through marriage but unfortunately, the useless fathers always contributed a Y-chromosome— that was until this generation. After two sons, Fern Jacques finally gave birth to a daughter. That night both families sent fireworks into the air to celebrate. They named the baby Ida after the famous matriarch of the Hendricks family as a wish that Ida would one day enter the Hendricks family and become a great lady like her namesake. It seemed as if everything was set in stone from the onset. It was a sunny Spring day at the Jacques estate. Both families had gotten together with the two young mothers sitting on the plush carpet floor playing with their children. Ida, only six months old, had just started to crawl. With pursed lips, she eyed the strangers warily as she milled around her mother and brothers. Her two brothers, John and Jason, five and three respectively, tinkered with their toy trucks, ignoring their slobbering sister. Close by, Katy Hendricks held her two sons, Harry and Kensley, identical twins who had just turned three a couple of weeks ago. Charles, the old patriarch of the Jacques family, chuckled from his seat on the sofa and said softly, “Set Ida in front of the boys, Fern. Let her choose her future husband.” James Hendricks coughed and leaned heavily on his cane. Cancer treatment had done a number on him but like an old soldier, he refused to give up. Charles looked over and patted his old friend gently on the back. “It’s about to start, old boy.” James nodded and his tired eyes turned to the children playing before him. Fern gently nudged Ida forward towards Katy and her sons. “Go on, darling.” Ida turned to look at her mother who nodded with a soft smile so Ida looked forward and began crawling towards the toddlers. Her brothers only spared her a glance as she passed them before returning to their toys. Katy took a few steps back so Ida wouldn’t feel intimidated leaving her two sons to the little girl who kept creeping closer. Just as Ida got halfway, Harry bolted up and ran to his mother leaving the quiet Kensley to face the baby alone. The adults chuckled but didn’t bother interrupting and watched with interest as Ida inched forward. When she was mere centimeters from Kensley, Ida sat down right in front of Kensley, studying him with her large amber eyes. The sun shone through the large bay window, warming the expansive room; all the adults oozed with genuine happiness at the cute scene. Without warning, as if a switch was flipped on, Ida launched her little body at Kensley grabbed his arm, and munched down. With a howl, Kensley grabbed her hair with his free hand and yanked hard. The two went at it like rabid dogs. Horrified, the young mothers hurried forward and grabbed their children, prying them apart and the whole room erupted into chaos— the sounds of children crying and adults trying to talk above the din filled the air. Only the two old men sitting on the couch watched the hullabaloo in silence. James leaned over and patted his old friend’s hand with a knowing smile. “They are meant to be.” Charles said nothing but his eyes glimmered with amusement at the scene. Over the years the two families met numerous times but the two kids just wouldn’t cooperate. The parents tried to get Harry to play with Ida but the young boy treated Ida like the plague and ran away as soon as he spotted her. Thus years went by and whenever Ida and Kensley came together, they would inevitably fight. One hot summer day, the families decided to vacation on a ranch the Hendricks family owned. It was a large plot of land surrounded by a dense forest. The two young fathers had given their wives a much-needed break and offered to watch the children as the women went to town for a shopping spree. After an hour or so, with the sun beating down on them, the two businessmen were driven to the cool shade of the gazebo. Musing over a bottle of beer, they watched the five children play. Thomas Jacques, a tall man with a high nose and gorgeous features he inherited from his French mother, spoke first, “Maybe they were enemies in a past life?” Lawrence shook his golden head with a sigh. “It guts me to say we might not see our families unite in marriage once again.” The two clink glasses and down the cold beverage secretly eyeing one other. “What—” “Do—” The two start and stop abruptly and pursed their lips in unison. Thomas coughed then smiled slyly and spoke up. “What do you think of trying for another? Maybe you’ll get lucky and have a baby girl?” Lawrence frowned. “I did think of it but after a grueling 14-hour delivery with twin boys, my wife told me, in no uncertain terms, that she would divorce me before having another. Also, I may go bald if she did.” He pointed to a thinning patch of hair on his head where Katy had latched on to when her epidural ran out and she had to push the two babies out the medieval way. Thomas clamped his mouth shut to avoid laughing at Lawrence’s expense. With a sigh, Lawrence followed up on the suggestion. “You should try for another daughter. I think you’ll have more luck than I would.” Thomas offered a wry smile, he too didn’t want another rugrat in the family preoccupying his wife’s precious time; three was two too many. Clearing his throat a few more times Thomas looked back at the children. Suddenly he jumped to his feet, his eyes wide in panic as he surveyed the grounds frantically. Lawrence, noticing his friend’s unease also stood up. “What’s wrong?” “Where is Ida?! Where is Kensley?” The two men dropped their beer bottles and ran around like a pair of chickens without a head, calling for their children in sheer panic. Nothing good came from pairing Ida with Kensley and with the two missing at the same time it practically spelled doom.