" I DON'T WANT TO FALL IN LOVE ANYMORE"

Amy caressed the large bulge of her belly. She started crying again because of her situation. She will give birth to her child without a father, just as her mother Aling Rosa had feared. There was nothing she could do anymore. Her child will be like her, who was always teased by others as a bastarda. A child born out of wedlock. Amy closed her eyes tightly before a tear fell down her cheek. That's why when she was young, she preferred to lock herself inside their house rather than socialize and play with others. Her playmates always made her cry. Now she is afraid that the same thing will happen to her child. It is so painful for a mother like her to see her child being bullied and crying. She stopped crying and quickly wiped her tears when someone knocked on the door of her room.* Amy was surprised when she opened the door to her mother, Aling Rosa.* "Is that you...?" "It's me, Amy," Aling Rosa answered. Sadness was evident on her face. I don't want to blame Francis, Mother. From the very beginning I knew that it was Grace whom he really loves. Francis was a sweet-talker back then and was playful with women's feelings. I gave in to temptation even though I knew I couldn't expect anything from him. I am the one at fault. When Francis met Grace, his love for her changed him. But I am just part of the past of the old Francis," Amy said at length. "My child..." "We shouldn't have forced Francis to take responsibility for what I'm carrying, Mother. You shouldn't have had him kidnapped and threatened. You shouldn't have made his life miserable and even planned to kill him when you learned that he met with Grace. Grace is his wife so that is his right," Amy said to her mother, in tears again. Amy, my child..." Francis is dead now, Mother. I went to his burial last week and I talked to Grace..." What did she tell you?" The truth. What should be for you." Aling Rosa frowned at what her daughter said. W-what do you mean?" You should be held accountable under the law for what you did to Francis, Mother. Including..." "...the chaos you caused in the Escudero family and the Villaramas." Is that what you want to happen, huh, Amy? That I will be jailed?" Aling Rosa asked her daughter, sounding hurt. Amy was unable to speak for a long time. Extreme sadness showed on her beautiful face, before a bitter smile traced her lips. T-that is what is just, Mother. For the peace of San Dionisio and of the two families that you disturbed. You yourself also told me that, that every deed a person does has a corresponding reward or punishment. If what you did was good, your reward will also be good. But if what you did was bad, punishment is its equivalent. If you were not afraid to do something bad, you should not be afraid to face the punishment that awaits you." Aling Rosa smiled sadly at her daughter. You are right, my child. Maybe I really became too cruel. But I only did that so you would not be oppressed. I don't want what happened to me before to happen to you. It doesn't matter if I am the one who gets oppressed, as long as you and your future child don't become pitiful." I found out that you were not oppressed by my mother, Mother. You were the one who became cruel to her and...in his family. She was treated like a younger sibling by Señora Loreta then. But instead of returning her kindness, you even envied her. That's why you seduced my father. You succeeded and you got pregnant with me. But you got angry when he sent you away because you insisted that he leave his family. So it's not true that my father abandoned me, is it, 'Nay? That's just what you told me so that I would also hate him. But the truth is he wanted to support me. It's just that you hid me from him and deprived me of him. Because you wanted to punish him." W-who told you that thing?" It's no longer important, 'Nay. I just want to tell you that because of what you did, you didn't just punish Señor Melandro but me as well. You deprived me of my father whom I could have been proud of to my playmates then." F-forgive me, my child." I always forgive you, 'Nay. I cannot bring myself to be completely angry with you. Because no matter how you turn the world around, I have only one mother and that is you. But I can no longer depend my life on you, including the future of my child. Let me..." just be able to make my own decisions for myself." Y-you will leave, Amy?" She nodded sadly at her mother. Yes, 'Nay. In one week I will leave this place and go far away. I will start a new life with my future child." Aling Rosa did not speak. She still managed to nod in agreement with Amy's wish. AFTER their talk, Aling Rosa suddenly disappeared. Amy didn't know where her Mother went again. Day and night she worried that something bad might happen to her. After a few days, Amy heard news that her mother was already in jail at the San Dionisio Provincial Jail. She immediately got ready to go see Aling Rosa. The trip from Pilomina to San Dionisio is quite far but Amy didn't mind it. She wanted to see and talk to her mother. No matter what sin her mother committed, she could not just turn her back on the person she owes her life to. It was obvious that Aling Rosa was surprised to see her child. What are you doing here, Amy?" I want to know if you are okay, 'Nay. Did they hurt you?" she asked full of concern. Aling Rosa shook her head gently at her child. No, Amy. Even though I am a criminal they didn't hurt me. Ariston Villarama just came from here." The father of Francis?" Aling Rosa nodded to Amy. Yes. He was so furious when he saw me. He was about to attack me to hurt me but he was quickly stopped by his son Miguel." Amy became sad with what she heard. But she cannot blame Ariston Villarama. He lost a son. Melandro Escudero also came here..." Why did he visit you, 'Nay? Is he also very angry with you?" No. He was asking about you from me. He wants to see you, child." Amy didn't know what she would feel in those moments. It was only now that her mother did not lie about her father. It was only now that she didn't hide from her the chance to feel that she is important to the father she didn't grow up with.