The Edge of Creation

So Imagine this...   Only child.. of a loving mother who spoils you rotten.  Decent life with a best friend who you trust with your soul.. Straight A student, friendly with everybody, and the only drama is with your recently broken up with Ex boyfriend who you found out had lied to you for the span of pretty much your entire relationship of 2 years. Now take allllll that..... and forget it. Because this story isn’t about my sweet high school life I had. It’s about the short life that it’s going to turn into... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I couldn’t see anything... dust and dirt is flying everywhere but I can feel everybody. I know they’re there. I just need to trust in them... I know that I can count on them to hold their own. And they know they can count on me too. I just wish I had more time to tell them how much I appreciated them.. You’d think I’d learn from my mistakes that lying is what tears people apart. Keeping things from the ones you care about and especially the ones you love is what breaks people. But I couldn’t tell them.. I couldn’t let them know. Because they would try to stop me. HE.. he definitely would stop me. And I can’t have that. Not this time. I know what I have to do and I know the risk. But giving all those I hold precious to me a chance to live in peace and be happy matters more to me than anything else right now. I just need to focus. Let them feel what I’ll never get the chance to say. Do it now.. you don’t have much time. I let my emotions flow through me into the barrier we formed through each other. I wanted them to know how much I care about them.. I wanted HIM to know... I showered them with my love, and trust. My hope, and my faith in them. Then only thing I didn’t let me feel was my heartache.. my brokenness from what I was about to put them through. I could feel they’re smiles as my feelings reached them. And I didn’t need to see or speak them to know they felt the same way... It’s time.  Deep breaths... 1..2.. and I let go.