Golden Cage

Part Nineteen

I have no idea why i was jealous or mad. He never said that he is mine, only that i am his. But the mere idea that he can be with some other woman, touch her or kiss her, makes my heart cry and a feeling of jealousy fills it up.

He stormed into the room, clearly mad and entered the bathroom with a loud bang.

I laid still in bed, trying not to draw his attention, not when he is in this mood. 

But apparently today is not my day.

-"Walk away from me like that again, I swear Alyanora, you will f*****g regret it."

I walked away?! in which way?! 

-"Did you hear me?!" he almost growled 

-"Yes" my voice sounded so broken.

I felt him climb into the bed and turning off the lights. The room was dark and the only source of light was the moon. His hand wrapped around my waist and pulled me closer to his chest. I felt my traitorous body heating up and my p*ssy getting wet. He started kissing my neck and shoulder, licking the spot under my jaw which always caused me to melt and then sucked right where my shoulder and neck meet, leaving a love mark behind. But the images of him with another women kept creeping into my mind. Knowing that he can or will do to someone else, caused tears to spill out of my eyes. 

Tears of desperation, knowing that i cant do anything about it. He will never let me leave. I never want to leave him. But the idea that i have to share him with someone else will kill me slowly, that every time he leaves the house, i will sit and have to guess where he is going, is he going to the other woman or not ? the idea that maybe one day he will come home, smelling of the other woman's perfume? or have marks from their time together?

I will kill myself before reaching that point in life. 

The images started flashing in my mind, him coming home, me seeing the texts on his phone, her coming to this house, a huge victorious smile on her face knowing that he spends all the time with her, him telling me to pack my bags and leave, or him dumping me and leaving me all alone. Never to feel his touch again, never to hear his voice again and never to sleep in his arms. Seeing the two of them hugging each other and kissing each other, as i stand there crying my heart out, pleading with him to give me another chance, begging him to take me back.

I never felt more safe and secure in his arms, but knowing that these same arms can break me and my heart, crash my world in matter of few words. But why would he stay with me? I am not beautiful! I dont know how to socialize! I am clumsy and shy, all i love is staying at home and be surrounded by as fewer people as possible. 

Why would he stay with me? even if i was his mate? I am weak! A girl who fell in love with her kidnapper, a girl who gave up fighting in a matter of days!

He will get bored from me, he leave me.

Sobs started to escape from me. Heartbreaking cries that rocker my body and i couldnt stop myself from shaking.

-"Kitten? kitten, whats wrong?" he sounded worried and immediately flipped me over, so i was on my back facing him, -"shhh,,, dont cry, tell me whats wrong?"

-"Yo-yo-you you are-are go-going to le-leave me" i managed to stay between all the sobs

-"What?" 

-"yo-you are going..." sob "going" sob "going to leave me for her"

-"Who her?"

-"the other woman" and here i broke down completely. "please please don't leave me, i cant live without you! I will be better, i will become better, i promise!! I will be everything you want, i promise. Please dont go to her, dont choose her over me! you said we are mates and mates are forever!"

I kept on begging and promising everything to him. I dont even remember what i promised but all i cared about him not to leave me.

He pulled me to his chest and hugged me tight, for some reason that made me cry even harder. I kept promising and begging and just repeating it all over again, for hours. Till i finally was spent.

I dont know how much time have passed before i calmed down.  He hugged me all that time and just stroked my hair, not saying a word. 

I felt him try to get up, i whimpered a weak no and hugged him even tighter. He sighed, picked me up with him and went to the chairs near the mini bar. He sat me down on the chair and gave me a kiss on top of my head.

I watched him pouring himself a drink, drink it up in one gulp, pour another one, drink it in a gulp and another one and another one, he then poured himself another full glass and a glass of water and walked back to where i was sitting. I never stopped watching him, trying to memorize every line, every hair, every twitch, every tattoo. 

He sat down next to me, gave me the glass of water and lighted himself a cig.

-"I need you to listen to me very carefully now, okay?"

I nodded

-"I will never f*****g leave you. You are my mate. I dont need any other f*****g c*nt here with me or any other bitch." he gulped down the glass, angrily put it on the table. "Bring me the bottle" 

I jumped and ran to the bar, not wanting to disappoint him, grabbed the bottle and brought it back. I dont know what got into me, but instead of returning to the couch, i kneeled down, next to him and just hugged him leg.

He looked down at me, his eyes grew darker. He grabbed the bottle and poured himself another full glass.

-"You are perfect. You are my f*****g perfect. I dont need you to f*****g change a s**t about you, do you understand?", i leaned into his leg and nodded.

-"Come here" he whispered darkly and grabbed my nape, i crawled to where his hand guided me. Between his legs.

The hold he hand on my nape, became almost painful.

-"If i ever hear you speaking or even thinking such bullshit one more time, I swear i will beat you black and blue, do you understand me?"

-"Yes master" I meekly replied 

He let go of me, grabbed his glass, put the ashtray on the couch and relaxed. I put my head on his thigh and closed my eyes, enjoying this moment. The peace i felt inside of me was hilarious compared to the panic attack i had.

I dont know how long we stayed in that position.

-"Master, can i ask you something?"

-"yes kitten"

-"who is Lily?"

He smirked, "And here i was waiting for the question of the year"

-"She is someone i used to f**k"

-"Used to?" my voice was weak and low

-"I didn't touch or ever think of another women, since 4 months ago"

Since we met.

-"But your friends said,,,"

-"My friends need to keep their mouths shut", he growled

-"Master, but they said that she thought you will mate her"

-"Thats her f*****g problem not mine. I never promised her and everyone knew that I would never mate anyone but my mate"

-"Is it possible?"

-"Yes, if two people are sure that their mates are dead or if they want to, but the mating bond is much weaker "

-"And they said that people will never accept me, cause am weak" 

-"I dont need a f*****g queen to help me rule, i need a f*****g mate to create a home for me. I need a mate who will welcome me when i come home, with a meal and a hug, I need a mate who will be a good mother to my kids."

He gulped down another glass and it was filled one more time.

-"I need a mate, who will calm me down and comfort me, when i come home. I dont need a mate to argue with me, I need a mate to be a f*****g mate"

I put my head back again and started to slowly hum some melody. I felt tension leave his body.

-"Master?"

-"yeah?"

-"I love you master"

His hand tightened on my head in possessive away.

-"Say it again"

-"I love you master"

And we sat like that till the sunrise, with him demanding me to say it again and me saying it again and again.