Try Sleeping With a Broken Heart

I did NOT want to get outta bed this morning. Today was supposed to be my first day off in a long time and I had plans on sleeping in. Something told me to turn off my ringer too but no, it went off loud as hell when Asia called me a few minutes ago crying into my ear drum. I had met Asia shortly after I moved to Baltimore just three years ago, but time couldn’t tell cause we were thick as thieves.  Asia was an up and coming singer with more demands than Mariah Carey. Every one that worked for her feared her and her tantrums. The first day we met, she tried to test me but I didn’t play that s**t and checked her lil skinny behind. Though I had only been at my job for about a month, I wasn’t kissing any body’s ass.  As a former celebrity stylist, I was used to these celebs treating you like they were better just cause they had a little bit of paper. Growing up in the projects, I had thicker skin than most and it also meant I wasn’t afraid to hold my tongue. Once Asia realized she had met her match, she quickly cozied up to me and we became friends off the back. Dragging my feet into the shower, I let the cool water run down my back to wake me up while I quickly brushed my teeth. After rinsing off, I turned the water off and stepped out the shower to dry my skin before heading over to my closet. Since it was supposed to be my day off, I decided to still dress the part; throwing on a pair of leggings, a white tee, and my oversized cardigan. Since it was a bit chilly, I chose to wear my favorite Ugg boots that I had customized with Swarovski crystals. After pulling my thick hair into a messy top knot, I scanned myself in the full-length mirror that I had posted up on the wall. For a bummy day, I still managed to look cute of course. I was a thick girl, but I never hid it. My full breasts and thick thighs gave me an almost perfect hourglass shape, so the little tummy I had didn’t really mean s**t to most real men. Grabbing my phone and other essentials, I made my way to the elevator. I loved my little building; it was an old warehouse that was converted into loft apartments, one of the charms about Baltimore that I had fell in love with. Once in the lobby, I flashed a smile at the new doorman. He was real young, and I knew he had a crush on me the way got flustered whenever I was around him. My Acura RLX was parked right out front, thanks to him saving me a parking space whenever I got home late. As the car came alive, Biggie Smalls’ voice blasted through the speakers.  “Ayee.” Though I loved Baltimore, I would always be a Brooklyn girl at heart. I was born and raised in Bed-Stuy where I lived with my momma in Marcy Projects, most noted for where Jay-Z grew up. Though we were obviously not rich, my mother never had me wanting for anything which was why her death had hit me to the core. Anyways, back to reality. It took me less than half an hour to reach the studio and as I pushed the door open I had to duck from a spiked Louboutin heel Asia had just thrown across the room. “Watch it Miss Campbell,” referring to her as the infamous super model, notorious for throwing things at her employees. Asia hopped out her chair and ran over to give me a hug. “Took you long enough,” she pouted. “b***h, I was sleep.” I scanned the room; the original stylist was standing beside the clothes rack and rolled her eyes when she saw me. “What seems to be the problem?” I asked Asia, not taking my eyes off her stylist. Asia leaned closer to me. “This b***h don’t know what the f**k she doin Elle, tryna put me in some frou-frou girly shit...” Chuckling, I grabbed her hand and led her back over to the rack of clothes. "What's the shoot for?" I asked while browsing through the rack. "To promote my new song..." "Gotchu..." I pulled out a blush colored silk blazer that I thought would complement her burnt sienna skin tone and paired it with the matching shorts. Since she was a part of the itty-bitty titty crew, I had her go braless, carefully using fashion tape to make sure there wouldn’t be any nip slips. Once she was dressed, I handed her a pair of black Tom Ford sandals and gave her a long gold necklace with diamonds that dipped between her breasts and a couple statement rings to complete the outfit.   I decided to stick around and watch her shoot; I didn’t have anything else going and I knew it would be almost impossible for me to go back to sleep. "Where you headin after this?" I asked Asia as she shed off the outfit I had given her for her own. "One of my homeboys asked if I could hop on his track so imma meet up with him at the studio." As she tied the laces to her sneakers, Asia looked up at me slyly, "homeboy is FINE by the way." I rolled my eyes dramatically. Asia had a whole girlfriend so the only reason she would bring up how dude looked was to try and set me up. I told her time and time again, I was not checkin for NO man at the moment. Truth was, I been hurt too many times and just wanted a break from all the bullshit. Besides, my rabbit vibrator was all I needed at the moment. "Good for him, I'll check you later..." Giving her a quick hug and kiss before heading back to my car. As I turned the car on 'Trap Starr' by Jaceon started playing on the radio and I quickly shut it off. I couldn’t stand to listen to his songs; after all, he was the first person to ever break my heart. With the car now quiet, I started to reminisce about my high school days. Jay and I were the IT couple at our high school; all the girls hated on me for having him but at the time I didn’t care cause he was the only friend I needed. Our mothers had been best friends since they grew up in the same projects together so it was only natural that we became best friends as well. We had been inseparable since birth, but it wasn’t til my sixteen birthday that he professed his love for me in which I then let him take my virginity.  Jay had been singing for as long as I knew him and senior year a record label saw a video of him on YouTube and contacted him right away. That's when things went left; he started splurging on clothes and expensive jewelry and had even started to skip school. Of course, his little fans at school hated me even more and started threatening me and making fun of my weight and s**t. Then one day, he had showed up after school in his new BMW and invited me to a fancy hotel room where we made love til the sun came down. As I started pulling my clothes back on, he presented me with a gold diamond promise ring, that had his emerald birthstone in the center. He explained to me that the label requested he move to LA before he could sign a deal and he swore up and down that once he got situated, he would take me out the projects... I never heard from him again. Aside from losing my first love and best friend, that same night I found my mother curled up on the kitchen floor and after calling 911 to rush us to the hospital, I found out she had stage four breast cancer. I graduated from high school on the Dean's List, and after the ceremony I raced to the hospital to show her my gown; but I was too late. Instead I found Jay's mom sitting beside her bed and crying softly, she had told me my mom tried to hold on but couldn’t. That s**t broke me; and since I had no other family and was broke as a joke, I decided to have her cremated. I worked two jobs to put myself through college and continue paying rent at our apartment. All the way Jay was living his best life in Hollywood. If you wanna ask if I was jealous, the answer is no. I was more hurt than anything. Every time I hear one of his songs or see his picture in a magazine, it brings up the pain. After managing to get a parking spot around the corner from my apartment building, I headed straight upstairs. Kicking off my boots at the door, I collapsed right onto my king-sized bed without bothering to change my clothes. As my stomach growled, I pulled out my phone to order some Thai food off of Uber Eats. s**t said one hour, which gave me time to take a lil power nap.