When I opened my eyes again, it was early morning. I could feel the slight chill in the air coming through the partly closed bay window.
Somehow during the night, I had climb halfway onto Josh, who now laid fully on his back.
I lift my head to look at him, and see his dark eyes enchantedly staring back at me.
He full lips takes the shape of a smile, and mines mimicked his. He kisses me on my forehead, then asks
"Did you sleep good?
"Yes," I mumbled.
"Are you feeling better now?" Josh gentlely probes.
I think about and realised that, I could do nothing to change it. I had found my birth paper and adoption papers, in my father's safe. I had taken copies and placed back the originals.
It was a normal birth paper. It stated my time and date of birth, the name of the hospital. Under mother's name, it listed Jacqualine Francis, and father was listed as unknown.
It was the wording of the adoption documents, that hurt the most. It made me feel like an object. My birth mother had it written in, that she wanted no contact, to view her as dead. She had them legally promise never to tell me that I was adopted, as she did not want me looking for her. She did everything to protect herself from me ever finding her.
She didn't want me, never did.
I took in a deep breath, releasing it, I tell Josh "Yes."
"Are you sure?" he scrutinized.
I frowned, rolling off him onto my back. He follows my movement, hovering over me.
He places both his hands at the side of my face, exaiming me closely. I see him lean in closer, his nose caressing mines.
He's going to kiss me!
My overly excited brain relays to me. I felt happy looking deeply into his enticing eyes. Josh lets his lips lightly touch mines, giving me butterfly kisses.
Unexpectanly, he plunges his hot wet tongue into my mouth. I let him lead me, as I was inexperience.
I had answered my own questions. I did want Josh to kiss me. I did want to do s****l things with him. I did want him to be my boyfriend.
His kiss deepens and I hear him, moan into my mouth. I feel his body tenses and he shivers. I didn't know what wae happening to him.
A feeling of unease began creeping into my subconcious, I tried to push it down but something bad wanted to come forward.
Josh leaves my lips, kissing me all over my face, he kisses my forehead, my eyes, my nose, my lips again. He moves down a bit kissing my chin, then my neck, sucking on it harder and harder.
His moans became more frequent and louder.
My body freezes, but he doesn't seem to notice, too caught up in the rapture of his feelings.
I feel the pressure inside me, boiling over looking for release.
Then I feel Josh hand on my breast.
I hear a loud pop, and the pressure inside me bursts out, seeking to destroy and descimate all in its path.
Regaining consciousness, I found myself high above the trees, the wind whipping my hair all over my face. I landed on my knees, and looked around me. The place was unrecognizable.
Trees were ripped up and houses were torned apart. Utility lines laid on the ground, the wires sparking. Cars were strewn all over, I saw a BMW i Grand Coupe in the window of a house. After searching ten minutes, I found the broken Eucalyptus tree.
I walked over the debri looking for my treehouse.
My former tree house, laid in a million pieces on the ground. I ran towards it, shoving pieces of wood aside, trying to find Josh.
I panicked, no I did not do this! I could not have!
"Josh, oh my god, please, please don't be dead," I wailed in anguish, sobbing out loud.