Audrey's strength

Up and down

I got home Marry was waiting with dinner for me. I decided apologies her for my morning behavior. She just hugged me. After I saw she wanted say something I wasn't sure I wanna listen but I asked.

"Marry talk with me? What's on your mind" I asked with fear.

"I know I just work here and I'm no one for you. But if you would like talk with me I'm here for you. Am.. am.. a... Ech s*x including" Marry was more than help for me, she saved me and I was terrible for her. I felt bad.

"Marry you are important to me. I know I was a*s to you. But I know I can come to you with every sorrow, happiness and to ask about s*x" I smiled

"I brought it because I see that u and Jess got a thing. And you already sleeping together. I just wanna note protection, oh mine I'm more blushed than on my first date." yeah she was red and ashamed. But was the only person who wanted make me be aware.

"We slept in one bed. It's all. He is my friend. We did nothing" I said the truth. Half truth. I skipped the part that I'd like more. I didn't say that as soon as I was alone in the car I started to miss him. I went to my room, stretched out on the bed, and hugged the pillow that Jess was sleeping on. It smelled like him. I didn't have much time to dwell on the last days with him. I had to prepare for tutoring. It was my way to have some of my money. I made money teaching others, writing a little. All to be independent as soon as possible. Every month I got pocket money from my grandparents. I put them on my account.

"So you and this new guy are together?" Eric asked me when his mother closed door behind us

"We're friends, but I'm not here for gossiping. Can we learn?" Me and Eric it was only work. He always was nice for me but when I was teaching him he or didn't listen or play on his cell. Next day I always have been sending him notes and his grades were better. So when he asked about Jess I didn't feel obligation to answer. It wasn't easy work making abbreviations from whole week. It was hard because most of the time I felt like I was talking to myself

About 10 pm I was back home. Mr Johnson came to me when I left car in garage

"Miss Audrey you have guest. I let him inside after half hour when he was sitting on stairs" was it Jess? I run inside. Jess was sitting on couch. His leg was jumping he held his cell in hands

"Hey, what's up?" I was so happy to see him

"f**k Audrey! Where have you been! I wrote, call!" my smile didn't disappear was wider. Jess Logan was worrying about me

"I think my cell is on my desk. Sorry I'm not use to check" how to melt his anger? I came closer to him and made him looking in my eyes

"Hey why you not at Hill? I'm ok, sorry and thank you" his eyes from black changed to dark brown is it sign his mood changing?

"I was worried Audrey, so worried!" his hands grabbed my face. I was vulnerable under his warm touch closed me eyes.

"Where have you been A?"

"I was at Maclaren's to teach Erwin as every week" his eyes pierced in mine. I didn't feel comfortable

"Eric! For so long?" was he possessive or so curious

"Whole week, every subject I was fast" I was trying to warm up the atmosphere he was so tense why he was so worried about me. I achieved smirk.

"I have to go back, please remember about phone ok?" I nodded he kissed my nose and left me. My cell was on my desk 13 miss calls and few messages all from Jess.

'hey how's your evening?'

'I did something wrong?'

'Audrey?'

'please just say you ok!'

First time in my life someone gives a f**k about me

'hey, Jess how's work? Sorry for silence was out and forgot phone. Hope you not upset'

Maybe I shouldn't do it.

'Audrey it's not funny'

Fuck!

'will you come after work to talk?'

'I can't A.'

Great Audrey you f****d up! Congratulations! I didn't respond for his message and went sleep. From dreaming woke me up Marry wandering in kitchen. I took cell to check hour. New message waited for me.

Was picture of hudge hand tightly holding steering wheel. Sent at 6:30!

'I've promised mom company at family visit. That's why couldn't come. Have a great day A.'

I've answered immediately

'6:30! On Saturday! t*****e!'

Master of writing. Audrey Monroe dream to be writer but can't write simple message!

'you like sleeping long hm? I dream about nap'

Well I've dreamed about you Jess but won't write it down

'can't you hide to sleep a little'

'it's impossible 3 little cousins run around'

Poor Jess.

'do they have tree house? Good place for nap'

So wise Audrey! He responded with picture of small pink house on a tree

'Audrey I'm 6,6 ft, I'm screw!'

6,6 ft of pure muscles. How best describes him? Not as wide as basketball players still not so slim as volleyball ones. Perfectly in between

'will show you something'

And I've send him a picture of my hand on duvet

'cruel'

I was laughing. Not only from funny conversation but because I was happy we were talking normally. Like wasn't yesterday evening when he got angry at me. But why he was so worried and nervous for not responding to him

'Jess sorry for yesterday. I all the time forget about cell. Hope you not mad at me anymore?'

It was so good view of him on my couch yesterday. Handsome guy was worried about me. It was odd still feel good knowing that someone gives a s**t of you

'I'm sorry. I've panicked'

Mr talker! I like it in him, but this answer is annoying. He doesn't like being pushed so I left it like this

'I'm making coffee. You want one?

'Already got two. One with you would be the best'

I read that over and over. He can be flirty. If he would have told me it in front of me I would be covered in red. Now I don't know what to say. And just like that we've been chatting whole weekend. The worst were almost 3 hours of his ride back home. When he wrote from home I wanted invite him in, but was coward

'my pillow still is full of your sweet scent'

OMG! I'm afraid invite him and he crossing all boundaries!

'mine needs recharge'

Why I've just wrote it! I felt sleep with phone in my hands. When it was buzzing I've opened eyes

'where are you?'

I forgot set alarm! Because Marry worked at weekend got free Monday Was 9:20. Well best classes just ending will skip school

'f**k! You woke me up! I overslept!'

Now he could laugh at me.

I used free day for doing nothing. Take food and played on my Xbox. I was killing monsters as Witcher when bell rang. As always sure it's only Mr Johnson I run to doors. And second time it wasn't him. This time I really regret my outfit. I had only my pj on my back, didn't brush my hair since yesterday

"Hey sleeping beauty I've heard here I can get great coffee" his shimmering eyes were scanning me with smile on his face, I felt embarrassed

"What's in the bag?" he came with shopping paper bag full of groceries

"If Marry let me in exchange for coffee and company I offer dinner" I looked inside he moved aside from me

"I'm alone today"

"The better" he didn't ask for letting him in. His free hand put on my waist and slowly pushed me inside with him. Went straight to kitchen unpacked his groceries I observed how good as home he already felt in my kitchen

"What coffee you like?"

"Still looking for my favorite" I rolled my eyes

"At least tell me with milk or without?"

"With but not too much" I looked at his face. Grumpy? Annoyed? I had to learn so much about this perfectly looking guy and I was willing to do it. But wasn't sure that with first my idea of coffee for him would pleased him.

I made two cups and passed him. Well waiting for sentence was killing me. I'm inpatient! One sip, second! Oh f**k me yelled my brain

"A. It's the best coffee I've ever drank! And not only because of perfect companion!" I knew how at this moment looked my face, my embarrassed was connected with his smirking.

"Taste second" his eyes had puppy look. He took second cup and again on verdict I had to wait, he was teasing me!

"Love them both." he took cups looked at me and asked where we're sitting I pointed my room and he went. I was shocked. How easily we built connection between us. We both loved being on our own but after we talked for a moment some kind of bond showed up. Both wronged by life. Both lonely. We understood each great and I really enjoyed his presence and I think he was too. Like two junkies addicted to each. I run after him he was already settled comfy on my bed with his cup

"What were you doing during day?" his curiosity I liked the most

"I was playing" gosh I sounded as the most boring person in the world

"On guitar?" I burst out laughing

"on Xbox, sorry to disappoint you but I can play only in games" we started to giggled

"Hey can you play on instruments?" he liked when I was same interested of him. He waved his hand in half half

"No one ever teached me but when I see piano can play melody" he was f*****g absorbing creature. I've smiled and run upstairs and same fast got down with ukulele.

"Give me some tune" he looked at me took small guitar and checked how it sound. Ukulele in his hands looked smaller than normally. He looked sexy whole in black only with silver necklace his back on my pillow bent head, one leg straightened and in his strong hands with ukulele. He made some practice and after I heard a song. He felt ashamed and pulled me on bed

"End of concert. What you playing?" and I've told him about my game he filled me with book details which was base of it was one of his favorites one. Soon he made steaks best I've ever eaten! I tried hard ate slowly but it was masterpiece! He looked at my empty plate with wide smile. When his smile was honest his dark eyes were shining like stars.

"Jess! I'm speachless! Believe me I ate many steaks but this one was the best! Why you eat so slowly!" he was laughing and cut part of his meat and slipped on my empty plate. I stood up and kissed his cheek. After we laid on bed and watch TV. Plan was we watch and I'm taking him home. But we both felt sleep. I woke up about 1 am in his arms. Strong grip tighten when I began to stir.

"Jess I need move to set up alarm"

"What" And he left me I looked at him how he was fighting. Be awake or go back to sleep. I set alarm at 7.

"Audrey can I stay?" we were already sleeping and about it he was asking. Best dreams I had in his arms

"Yes. But if you want I can drive you home or borrow you car" please stay, please stay I've repeated in my head. When my eyes were open I saw he took off his hoodie and t-shirt and was fighting with his jeans. Just in case I've made double check of alarm set and laid down his body immediately was by mine. Sorry Marry for the view in the morning.

Till Thursday Jess could stayed for night. His mom, gim, practice.

But on Thursday Dr Madsen called to warn that my mother escaped again but soon will be back. I saw new guard in front. And when I got crying attack Jess called

"Audrey what's going on?" my curious friend

"Nothing Jess, how's practice?" I've tried my best sound okey

"Are you alone?"

"Yes"

"Will be in less than 20" I have been driving from my home to Hill in 23 minutes. How was he going do it in less than 20?he was good trained driver and came after 15 minutes.

He came in without knocking, grabbed me and made to look at him

"Audrey talk please" his black orbs are like salvation. Warmth of his hands gave me sense of security. His fingers cleaning my face from tears changed my mood

"my mother run away again" and I didn't have to talk more. He closed doors and checked every window. Closed even doors to basement

"maybe we go to my place?" I shaked my head in no. With him I felt safe. He took me to my room sat on bed and dragged me on his laps. I tucked in his arms. For some time we just sit motionless.

"Jess?"

"Yes?"

"Where is a contest. I would like try it but it's team work. Can you help me?" I was ashamed of asking. For the first time I've asked for help earlier always teacher had to pair me with other and still I was doing it on my own.

"It depends." of what! I felt disappointed and looked at him

"what about it is?"

"Business plan contes. Not sure witch college is it but I think California because of language" I stood up and showed him details

"From when you interested in business?" And again he was curious but still didn't say that will help me!

"Always, so what's the verdict?" he just nodded and I hugged him. We laid down face to face. He was stroking my face my hands were traveling on his chest. When it was getting late Jess just grabbed me and turned me. He nestled on my back with his head in crock of my neck and shoulder.

"Audrey?"

"yes?"

"What about tomorrow evening? Maybe you will come with me to work?" my knight!

"Don't worry I got date tomorrow" when I said date I felt his body got tense. I turned to him and comb his hair

"With my uncle Kevin at Hill. So I won't be your burden and you will be able focus on your job" his dark eyes showed relief

"You never a burden Audrey. What about Eric?"

"He got a party, and moved our meeting on Monday" he was so sweet in worrying about me.

"I will keep eye on you on weekend ok?" I smiled to him, got goodnight kiss in forehead and was in his arms in our favorite spoon sleeping position.

To school we went straight from my home. If my mom would showed up would die looking at him in my dad's clothes. I liked this view.

"Marry its too much! I'm already full"

"Audrey I will stay for weekend!" no need for that. But I had to be gentle. Last time Marry saved my life when my mother attacked me, she felt responsible over me. But I wasn't sure if will be much home

"Marry go home I need prepare. I will be home very late or tomorrow. I'm going to Fun Hill to meet uncle Kevin. So please don't worry and go have weekend at home. Fridge is full of food, on Sunday I'm going to city to grandpa. So I will survive, ok?"

"And Jess?" she asked with suspicion.

"For sure he will race today so we probably say hi, on Sunday Jess and his mom are going with me"

"And Saturday?"

"I have no idea. I want prepare for next week to school. But if he will want to join or go somewhere I probably will agree. Marry I like him. But I will not be recless. I'm not ready, and I'm in too big mess." she hugged me said goodbye and I was alone till Monday.

I didn't have much time to be selective. I must trust my first choice of dress. It was short one bright colorful with flowers emblems matched it with shoes on high sole. Put tight blue jeans jacket on and silk light scarf to hide neck. My wrists was exposed so I covered them with bracelets on both hands. I put delicate make up. With red lipstick for contrast. I straightened my hair and left them loose. I took small purse grabbed few dollars and was ready. In the meantime I texted with Jess. I was addicted with him. Before leaving he send me his slefi with car he will be racing today. It was so cute I immediately put it as contact Pic.

Ride to hill was short. On gate security let me in. He knew me and my car very well. I found uncle by the main building. Kevin was tall and hudge. Had blonde hair and green eyes filled with shade od sadness after his wife left. She was his sweetheart since high school. They walked together whole youth but decided get old separately. It changed uncle, but not his feelings to me. When he noticed me greet me with huge smile.

In back of the main building was a flat stone part of the hill from which you could watch the 1/4 mile races and the main race finishing the competition. It was a place only for the chosen ones. I liked it. I was away and still saw everyone and everything. My uncle had his team of great drivers among them was Jess. They competed with visitor racers on 1/4. To competition could join everyone with strong car. At the end was the best fight emerged winner of a day.

When uncle was telling me how his business is working, what he plan to expand I was looking for black and green Mustang Jess was supposed to ride today. I Found it on racers parking. Jess was sitting on the hood and smoking while was talking with Bastien. I noticed he was holding his cell in hands. I took mine. When I wrote look up from pressing send button held me a hosstes. She approached to Jess and put her arms on his shoulders. He grabbed her hips. I thought I will pass out. Before I noticed Jess left her and went to the bar. I was sure he will buy her a drink. But he walk away with bottle of water. When he vanished from my sight I felt relive. Second later got text from him

Hey where are you? I start soon wanted greet you here.

I'm on rock

Don't go be in a sec

I wasn't sure if I wanna uncle to see us together. But before I made my mind I was in Jess hug.

"Wow you look stunning. I need find some guard to look after you" he played with my scarf.

"don't worry I'm under owner protection" I winked and we started to laugh. As always we had to be close. his shirt in some way was in my fist on his chest and was telling him about something not important when my uncle came. He gave us cold gaze but didn't comment. Jess asked to cross finger for him and went for race.

My uncle observed me for a moment cleared his throat

"Every my hosstes is charmed with him."

"and he?"

"I thought he is gay to be honest. Was always immune on theirs flirts. Now I see that he just got good taste." uncle gave me sweet look. He was always for me but never told me what I can or can't.

"He is good kid, you know. I like him, but look out ok? Don't gave him everything he wants"

"Uncle u are second person who try talk with me about s*x, and me and Jess are friends"

"Honey I walk on this earth for a long and I can recognize affection. And you two look much more than friends. So listen to uncle and call me around Kev. I need keep my tough image".

"Sure Kev" my uncle words touched me. Hmm did I have thing with Jess? I was happy that "Kev" likes him. I heard calling for first start. I saw Jess sliding to his car through window without opening doors and driving to line. A hostess the one who tried Pick up him earlier stood before 2 cars and count down began. She dropped her scarf and run started. Jess win easily, his opponent was total amateur. The rule was who wins can kiss hostess who started rally. When Jess won it was she who run to kiss him. He stopped her before she reached his face.

"told you" my uncle whispered me to ear.

"Kev can you fire her?" I asked totally serious but it made my uncle laugh he tried stop but just couldn't until tears felt from his eyes.

"I can't but I'm looking for bartender for weekends, interested? I will put you on race's bar, after u will help at ring's. U will have him on eye all the time. I pay good money" he offered me a job. I wasn't sure he joked or was serious.

"Kev it's serious offer or you just play with me"

"kiddo I'm telling the truth I need bartender. And you worked here earlier so u know the job. are u in? We will spend more time together, come on say yes"

"when do I start?" I needed job.

"Tomorrow and Sunday. Always u need be here before 6. On Sunday at 5 but only till 10 pm. Friday and Saturday till midnight. Later talk with Dimitri he will gave you prices of drinks. And rules. Zero alkohol to drivers. After last race they can drink but only in privet bar, rest must show you ID. It will be easy for you Audrey. I'm so happy we will be able spend some more time together. I really miss it."

While I was talking with" Kev" Jess finished his third run and was qualified to rally of night. All his runs started the same girl end every time she tried kiss him. I didn't know why but my blood was boiling.

"How much more 1/4 will be?" I asked uncle. He checked his cell and answered 4.

"Kevin can I have favor to ask?"

"For you everything. But before u ask I need say something. I am disappointed I was sure you look so good for old uncle and it's for Jess. Longer I look at u I'm more and more jealous. Joking. But you really look beautiful" with years Kev began be more and more sentimental. I liked him like this. But I felt he was lonely. He loved his exwife and was always faithful to her. She also was alone. I didn't understand why they not together.

"Am thanks and my look is for both of you. Now about my favor"

"shoot kiddo"

"Can I start main race?" I asked with full confidence.

"What if he lose?" my uncle asked what I was worried about.

"he won't. Let me please. I can't compare with them as a driver so let me at least do it, this one time? I'm aware of consequences"

"main race is yours, but I will take this girl close if u change your mind"

"I won't, and I'm sure he will win"

"just checking" my uncle has known me like no one

"what if he wins and treat you like this hostess?"

"I will move on, as always"

"you promise?"

"yes"

"And still will working for me?"

"yes"

"you sure u wanna check"

"yes"

I didn't know why I wanted do it. Maybe my father's blood appered. I was after him possessive and this hostess made me fuking angry. Before me about consequences though Kev. But it didn't stop me from doing it. I believed in him. I had to. f**k.

We got down to the start. My uncle called off a hostess and took off my jacket. I was only in my summer flower dress. I was ready. Jess saw me by the bar with uncle. He was confused, I'm sure he was. My uncle brought me shot of vodka he knew I needed it.

Spiker announced last most important rase. Around the hill. Cars was on theirs positions. Jess was in the middle of first line. I stood by his car's hood. After scarf fall don't move that's the rule. I put my hand up, they started engines. I waited for count 3,2,1 and the scarf down. I felt Jess eyes on me. When they passed me I went to bar, took another shot and looked on screen where you can watched whole race. Jess was third. I needed third shot, but my uncle told me to wait. And was right. Near the end Jess use straight part of road to passed rest. He knew this track great. At this run line of start was also the end. I saw him aproching it. He won. He passed the line and waited for rest.

I stood on place I supposed to be. With a flower and envelope with money for 1st price in hand. Rest came after good 20 seconds after Jess all this time we looked into our eyes. When we heard official end sound. Jess slided through window approached me with full confidence stood against me. With his right hand grabbed my back and slide me into his body. With left hand touched my face pulled to his and kissed me. Without asking for permission. At first delicate after small hesitant we kissed passionate. Till we both couldn't breathe. My first kiss was perfect. He didn't let go of me. Looked deep in my eyes.

"Don't do it ever again please"

"So no more kisses ok" I said with sarcasm.

"kissing will be much more but it was hard to win today and I had to be first for all coast, you know why?"

"I want to hear it from you"

"I can't let anyone to kiss you but me" and we kissed again. Our moment broke my uncle.

"Jess I need you unglue from her, Audrey gave him money, guys hello"

I gave Jess envelope and flower which he gave me back with kiss.

"ok so u put cars to garage and come to my bar. I want show it Audrey and need moment alone with her. And after who don't fight can drink at this beautiful Friday. Who fights wait with alcohol."

Jess came back to car and uncle took me to bar.

"you are your father's daughter you know. You risked all to get big win. He did that all the time. Always on the edge. If your dad was here Jess would be dead for being just close to you. And I let for way too much. Audrey do u even listen to me?"

"I'm trying but can't focus."

"Kiddo when your dad died I gave a promise, when you was in coma. That I will do everything to see u happy. U happy with him now?"

" yes"

"I will tolerate it, but it's hard see you become grown so fast. If he hurts you u will tell me ok?"

"I will"

"you both older than rest in your high but still kids, please take things slow ok?"

"I will try"

We were by entrance to my uncle bar. It was private place for him his driver's boxers and friends. Exclusive place here. Before we walked into my uncle said strange thing.

"Kiddo I did it for me, and him. It's not against you". We entered