Stuck Between Brothers

I open my eyes as I hear something shattering downstairs. "You were out with her again, weren't you?!" I hear my mother yell. Dad came home late again, and mom must have been drinking. "I already told you Amanda, I had to stay late for a meeting!" I hear what I assume is a bottle breaking. "Bullshit!" Mom screeches. Having heard enough, I slip out of bed and grab my bag. I always have an extra bag packed for nights like these. Josh and Lucas are my neighbors and best friends. Our parents used to be close, but my mom started arguments during every outing. Their parents still love me like I'm theirs, so they don't mind. Dad knows I run to their house during arguments, but mom is usually too hungover to notice I'm gone. "Chris, Chris! Stop, please. I'll do better. I'll be better." I hear my mom plead. Thats usually the sign that dad had enough and was about to leave. I hear the front door open and shut. Quickly I open my window and hop out, hoping to catch dad before he drives off. "Jude, honey. Sorry we woke you baby girl." I hear my dad say. We can hear things being smashed and thrown around inside the house as mom has one of her tantrums. "Go ahead and go to the boys', I'll be home early tomorrow." He says with a kiss on my head. Wiping the tears from my eyes, I cross the street and run up to Josh's window. I give it 3 taps before opening it. "Josh?" I croak out through my tears. He sits up quickly and throws his legs over the bed. "Jude? Are they fighting again?" I nod. He helps me through the window and just holds me in a strong hug. I breathe in his smell. It gives me comfort. He always smells like clean linen. Its my favorite smell. "Come on Judey girl, you can sleep against the wall." He leads me over to his bed and pulls the covers back. I like sleeping against the wall because I feel safety in the sturdy sheild. Nothing can get to me through it. Josh goes over to his closet where he has extra blankets and grabs one down for himself. He always gives me his blanket and grabs a new one. "Thanks Joshie." I sniffle. He climbs in to bed with me and starts twirling my hair around his fingers. "Anything for you Judey girl." As I snuggle in deep into his blanket and pillow, I hear his bedroom door open. "JuJu, did I hear you come in?" Looking over, I see a very sleepy Lucas. His hair is all over the place and he rubs sleep from his eyes. "Hey LuLu, you heard me." I say unable to hold back the sobs. "Oh JuJu!" Lucas says as he jumps into bed with me and Josh. "Hey! Watch it LuLu." Josh says mocking my nickname for Lucas. Giggling, I swat at Josh. "Oh stop that Joshie." "Theres that smile Judey girl." Josh says. He scoots over and I follow. Lucas squeezes between me and the wall. Thats the only time I give the wall up is if i have both brothers to protect me. After some shifting around and a few "ows", we all settle in to sleep. Lucas has his leg thrown over me, while Josh stays playing with my hair. I always feel so relaxed when he plays with my hair, it puts me to sleep. --------------‐---------------------------------------------------- The next morning, I wake up to Lucas breathing his morning breath into my nose. I look over and Josh's head and arm are hanging off the bed. I always feel bad for intruding, but my boys never seem to mind or complain. They are my best friends. Josh is 9, and Lucas is 8. Josh looks more like his dad with dirty blonde hair and deep blue eyes. Lucas takes after his mom with medium brown hair and the prettiest green eyes. I wiggle out from between them, and go to walk out of the bedroom. I open the door and come face to face with Bettie. Bettie is their mom and shes like my other mom. Well more of a mom to me now than my own. "Oh, Hi Mrs. Bettie!" I say, while wrapping my arms around her stomach. She pulls me in close and says "Jude, sweetie, is everything ok?" "Yes ma'am. Mom and Dad were arguind again." I tell her. My eyes start to sting a little, but I push it down. "Oh, ok baby. Go get ready, I'm making pancakes for breakfast!" I squeal in delight. I seriously love pancakes. She definitely knows the way to my heart. "Yes ma'am!" I shout as I run to the bathroom. After peeing and washing my hands, I make my way back to Josh's room. I left my overnight bag in there, and I need a shower and to get ready for school. I open the door and see Josh and Lucas bickering at eachother as they get up and out of bed. "You snore!" Josh yells. "I do not!" Lucas yells back, pushing Josh off the bed. "Oooooooh you!" Josh jumps up and jumos on Lucas and now they're wrestling. *sigh* Boys. "Hey, you two doofuses. Your mom is making pancakes!" They both whip their heads over to look at me. They smile, then they share a look. I know that look. I scream, and take off running. I hear their feet falling in step beside me, as one of them grabs me and I fall to the ground. "Get off!" I yell through my fits of laughter. Josh is sitting on my stomach tickling my ribs, while Lucas sits on my knees and fights for my feet. "S-s-stop it!" I say through clenched teeth. The tickle is starting to hurt. WHACK WHACK I look up and Mr. Andrews has a rolled up newspaper in his hand. No doubt, he smacked the boys with it. "Geez dad, she started it." Lucas says while pouting and rubbing the back of his head. "When a lady says stop, you stop." Mr. Andrews says while giving me a wink and helping me to my feet. "Now, how about some pancakes." He claps his hands together and licks his lips. As we all make our way to the kitchen, the doorbell starts ringing. Someone is hitting it over and over again. "Oh for the love of Christ!" Mr. Andrews yells out and starts walking to the door. I look around the corner when he opens it and I see my mom. "Is Jude here?!" She says frantically. Her face is all red and swollen. It looks like she has been crying. "uh, mom?" I say, worry in my voice. "Oh Jude!" She cries out, pushing past Mr. Andrews and runs to me. She scoops me up in to her arms and starts sobbing. "Amanda?" Mrs. Bettie walks up behind me, and runs to my mom. She wraps both her arms around us and my mom continues sobbing. "He he he's gone." My mom says between gasps of air. "Who's gone, mom? What happened?" I ask while awkwardly patting my moms head as she sobs in to my chest. "You're dad." She says. "Dad always leaves when yall argue, mom. He told me last night he would be home early today. He always comes back." I say with confidence. "N-no Jude. He's not coming back this time. My sweet Jude, I was so worried when I woke up to the police knocking and then I couldnt find you." She chokes out. I look up at Mrs. Bettie and she has tears in her eyes. "Jude?" Josh says from behind us. I look over at Josh and he looks just as confused as I am. "Dad. Dad whats happening. Why are you crying?" I look over at Mr. Andrews and see his hand covering his mouth while silent tears run down his cheeks. Then it clicks. The tears. The police. My mom actually hugging me. "NO!" I yell. I shove mom and Mrs. Bettie off of me. "NO NO NO NO NO. He always comes back!" I scream as I back away from the heap of adults on the floor. Mr. Andrew takes a step towards me with a choked out "Jude". That was all it took. I took off running. Dad always came back. He never left me more than over night. Dad was indestructible. Hes my best friend. My daddy. I run out of the door and out to the side walk. Looking both ways, I decide to go left. I take off running. I hear Mr. Andrews yelling for me but I dont stop. Dad has to be out here somewhere. I continue to run. As fast as my little legs can carry me. I hear two sets of footsteps running behind me and I know its Josh and Lucas. "Go away boys, I got to find my daddy." I say through my sobs. My vision is blurring from the tears, but I dont stop. I keep going. The boys never stopped following me. As I made my way through the streets of our little town, and run towards the only hotel in town, I see it. The bridge has a hole in its siding. Like someone drove traight through it off the bridge. There is police tape and cones around it, blocking it off to the public. I see my dad's car being towed up the side of the cliff. I collapse. "No! No! No!" I yell. I get back to my feet and take off towards the cops. One man hears me and turns around. He grabs me up. "What are you doing here?" He says. I look up and see the face of my uncle Donnie. "Oh Uncle Donnie! They said dad was gone." i sob into his vest. He starts rubbing small circles in to my back. "Shhh Shhhhh, princess." He coos at me. "No! Uncle Donnie, Where is Daddy?!" I yell. "He's gone baby. Hes gone." He whispers through tears. "He wouldn't leave me!" I yell. I start kicking and hitting Uncle Donnie. He puts me down and then I'm engulfed in 4 arms. I smell clean linen and know my boys are hugging me. I fall to the ground, and they go down with me. Holding me while I sob and cry. I'm pulling at their shirts, pulling at my hair. I just want the pain to stop. Who's going to love me? Who's going to take care of me? Who's going to protect me from mom? My daddy. My daddy is gone. And this time, he isnt coming back.