Angel wings

Chapter seven - This needs to stop

Melanie's POV:

I promised myself that I wouldn't talk with this boy again. I failed. He came up to me. I would've been rude if I had made him go away. At least I know his name. Jordan. I believe that this won't be the last time we'll meet. I'm still scared of his tattoo, but not as much as before. Mostly, I am confused. I still don't understand how this is possible. I'm not sure if I have to tell him about mine. He deserves to know, but I have no idea what his reaction will be. There is a chance that he won't like it. I have to be careful with my next move. I need to make sure that Jordan won't get mad at me. It's not like this is my fault. I had no idea that he existed. I mean, we haven't met before. That's why the worst thing is that I can't talk to anyone about this. That is if we exclude Adriana. For now, she is the only one who knows everything. Honestly, it's her fault. I would've never met him if she hadn't told me this nonsense. I know she had her reasons for that. I can talk to her, but I have nothing to talk about. Maybe I have to leave the boy alone. The less he knows, the better. Otherwise, things might get complicated. It's not like I expect something to happen. We only have matching tattoos. I will say this is a coincidence. No one knew about this. I think there is a reason for all this. There is a chance that he is my soulmate, but I don't believe it. I should tell him the truth, but I can't. I need to stop talking to him. This will only bring me problems. I hope that I won't see him again.

For the past few days, I couldn't sleep well. I keep thinking about him. That is because I realized something. Since he has an angel wing tattoo, this means something has happened. I know why I got mine. I can go to ask him. Well, I bet he won't tell me. This is too personal. Only my parents know what I did back then. Later, I started hanging out with my friends. I never told the girls anything. They don't need to know about all my mistakes. It's enough that I feel guilty every day.

I have a class now. I like our art teacher. She always gives us great topics to draw on. Today, we have a free choice. This means we can draw whatever we want. I'm not an artist, but I'm trying my best. In the end, I decided to make angel wings. Here is my drawing. There were two shadows with wings at the back. I didn't make an angel or devil. They were equal. At the end of the class, the teacher went to check our work. She came up to me and stopped. That's when the bell started ringing.

- It's interesting what you did there. What is the meaning?

- There is no meaning. That is the first thing that came to my mind.

- Are they connected somehow?

- They just met.

- I see. If you work more on it, you can make it perfect.

- You know I can't draw.

- There is no such thing as can or can't. It's either you want it or not.

- I understand.

- You can go and get ready for the next class.

- Thanks. I'll see you next time. - I said and left

I went to my locker to get the things for my next class. The girls were already waiting for me. I'm sure they will ask me questions. They want to know everything that is going on with me. I don't mind sharing, but I don't need to say everything.

- What happened? - Chelsea asked

- Nothing. I talked with the teacher for a while.

- For what? - Katy asked

- I don't need to tell you everything.

- Girls, she is an art teacher. For what else can they talk about? - Natalie asked with sarcasm

- We don't know. That's why I asked. - Katy said

- You need to learn to respect people's privacy. - I said

- What do you mean? - Chelsea asked

- I mean that you and Katy want to know everything for everyone. Don't you think this is too much? People don't need to tell you what they do every minute.

- Then what do we have to do?

- Find something fun. Don't you have a hobby?

- Melanie, their hobby is to talk about people. - Natalie said, chuckling

- Then find another one.

- Fine. We won't ask you anything. - Katy said

- Good.

For lunch, we went to the cafeteria. Katy and Chelsea were silent. Since they can't talk about people, they have nothing to do. I feel bad for them, but they deserve it. You can't gossip all the time. There are other things in life, too. I tried to have a conversation with them. It didn't work. They had nothing to say.

After school, I went home. I plan to go out later. That's why I finished my homework as fast as possible. I should be back until dinner. If not, I will send my mom a message. I know she will read it. What I will do is not right, but I want it. I took my things and went out. Then I went to the coffee shop. Well, I didn't walk inside. I only wanted to see if he was there. He told me that he worked full-time. I saw him sitting behind the cash register, making a drink. Something is calming in that. Except for the tattoo mystery, he is a nice guy. Soon, he lifted his head, and I ran away. Jordan can't see that I am here. I hid in the first corner I saw. It was right next to the shop. I checked out and saw him outside. Please tell me that he won't find me. I closed my eyes and crossed my fingers. That's when someone touched me.

- Can I help you?

- Hey, you. What are you doing here?

- I should ask you the same. You know that I work here.

- Oh, yeah. I forgot.

- Are you sure? I think you came here on purpose.

- What? No. Why would you think like that?

- Just because my head was down doesn't mean I didn't see you.

- Really?

- My eyes can see everything.

- I'm sorry.

- It's ok. Can I know why you are here?

- I only wanted to walk around.

- Melanie.

- It's true.

- Ok, don't tell me. I don't care anyway.

- You don't. - I said, a little bit disappointed

- Why should I?

- Right. I will go now.

- Don't you want a drink? There will be no coffee.

- Thanks, but I'm not thirsty.

- We have food.

- I'm not hungry.

- I can't offer you anything else.

- No one said that you have to do it. I will go home.

- If you wait for me, we can go for a walk.

- I can't.

- Why?

- Because coming here was a mistake.

- I don't think so.

- Look, it's better if we don't talk.

- Why? Did I do something?

- No, you have nothing to do with this.

- I think I do. You still haven't told me why you ran away.

- I have to go.

- Wait! - he said and grabbed my hand

- What?

- Will I see you again?

- Probably not.

- I think I will.

- You think much.

- How about a free drink?

- I don't get it. How will it be free?

- Well, it will be free for you. I will pay for it.

- Thanks, but you don't have to do it.

- What if I want to?

- I don't care. Can you let me go now?

- Why do you keep running away from me? What did you see?

- Nothing.

- It's not true. I know it. There is something that you don't like in me.

- Why do you care?

- Because if you don't like it, other people might do it, too. I don't want to be scary for anyone.

- You are not.

- Yeah, right. Please tell me.

- It has nothing to do with you. The problem is Adriana and me.

- Who is Adriana?

- One woman. It's a long story. The thing is that you are good the way you are. That's it.

- Then will you stay?

- No, I want to eat dinner at home.

- I get it. You don't want to be around me.

- I didn't say that.

- There was no need to. If you don't like me, stop coming here. It's simple. - he said and left

I was sure. Coming here was a mistake. I don't understand why he cares so much about that. I ran away, but it had nothing to do with him. Do people's opinions matter that much to him? I'm sure I was the only one who did it. He doesn't need to care that much. It's already in the past.

I walked around, and then I went home. My parents were already at the table. I'm probably a bit late, but it doesn't matter. I went to take a plate and started eating. I wish this could solve my problems.

- Honey, are you ok? - my mom asked

- Kind of.

- Did something happen?

- I don't want to talk about this now.

- Then how should we help you?

- I don't want help.

- But you might need it.

- Your mom is right.

- I think I disappointed someone again.

- What do you mean by again? We have talked about it. What happened is in the past. Please stop thinking about this.

- But I can't. These things haunt me every day.

- Melanie, this is not healthy for you. I think you have to let them go. You can't go back in time and change things.

- I know, but I want it.

- Take it as a lesson. You are not the only one who has done this.

- This won't make me feel better.

- Your mom wants to say that you are not the only one having problems.

- So what?

- You need to find a way to heal yourself.

- How?

- Maybe someone can help you. - my mom said

- If you mean the girls, I won't tell them.

- They are your friends and deserve to know the truth.

- No! I won't ruin my friendship.

- Honey, no one said that this would happen. I'm sure they will understand.

- No, I'm not doing it.

- Then how do you expect to get over this?

- I don't know. I will find a way, but it won't be this one.

- I think you need to trust them more.

- Well, I do.

- Are you sure? Best friends don't keep secrets.

- That happened before we became friends. Why do I have to tell them?

- Because they can help you. Natalie will be by your side all the time.

- No, I can't do that. I don't want them to feel sorry for me.

- Why don't you accept the help you need? - my dad asked

- I don't need it.

- Yes, you do.

- No, I don't. End of conversation. - I said and left

I don't know why my parents insist so much. There is no way I will tell my friends about this. I don't want them to think there is something wrong with me. I pulled out my headphones and played some music. Hopefully, this can help. I laid down and closed my eyes. I feel bad for what I told Jordan, but it was for the best. He doesn't need to know everything. Soon, I was pulled for a hug.

- Mom?

- Hey.

- I won't talk about it.

- That's not why I am here.

- Then why?

- Because I care. I hate to see you upset.

- I'm not.

- As a mother, I can see the tears.

- I don't have any.

- On the outside, no. You have them inside.

- That is ridiculous.

- All I want is for you to share with me.

- I have nothing to tell you.

- What you are doing is not healthy for you.

- So?

- You are breaking yourself even more. Why?

- The problem is mine.

- No, it's mine, too.

- Mom, please leave. I'm not in the mood to argue with you.

- I hope one day you will meet someone who will make you change.

- Why?

- Because you deserve to be happy.

- If you say so.

Mom stayed for a while. I didn't listen to her much. I understand that she cares, but this is my battle. I am the one who has to fight. It won't be easy, but I have to do it. Also, I need to apologize to Jordan. I don't know if I should go there again, but he needs to know that I feel sorry for what I did. He didn't deserve it. I should stop seeing and talking to him, but I can't. Something makes me go back there. I want Adriana to be wrong. I feel like she isn't. Part of me still wants to know what happened to him. There is a reason why he got this tattoo. I hope that my curiosity won't bring me more problems.